Some Welding Puns Being Made in r/OSHA Right Now
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalliKyle95
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2020
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My Dad works for a welding supplier, so heres his welding dad joke

A guy was cutting with an acetylene torch when suddenly there is a break in the line. The acetelyne starts shooting up his arm and a stray spark ignites it. His arm bursts into flame. He starts running around the shop waving his arm around while it's on fire until someone hits him with the fire extinguisher.

After the fire is out and the EMT's arrive, the police are there taking statements from the witnesses. When the officer finishes this, he pulls out his handcuffs, goes over to the burned guy on the ground, pushes the EMT out of the way, and arrests the burned guy.

When he brings the guy to the station, the chief asks him why he arrested this guy when he clearly needs medical attention. The officer responded by saying "He was waving a firearm in public"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Better_Devil
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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From the 2020 SAT, geometry section: A farmer is welding parts in his barn. He wants to cut four bars of equal length from two lengths of iron rebar measuring 16 feet, 8 inches and 5 feet, 10 inches. How much material will be discarded? Bonus: where will the rebar, once welded, go for a good time?

A square dance

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadacolt45
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
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I was out at Harbor Freight today with my dad getting gloves for welding, he said they fit perfect.

I said, "Like a glove."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FatKidFromTarget
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
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My wife and I were high school sweethearts. We met in welding class.

Her and I really bonded.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kopextacy
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2017
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What do you call two daggers welded together?

A shiv-al union...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tca_ky
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2020
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Why are all-weld aluminum boats so boring?

They have never done anything riveting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/observer2017
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
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When I was in the mafia I was working as a welder on the side, one day I accidentally welded two crucifixes together.

My boss is going to be so mad when he finds out about this double-cross.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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2 metal workers got married....

It was a beautiful welding.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
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My buddy wants to learn to weld from his dad

for some quality father son bonding time

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πŸ‘€︎ u/clarkanine
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2018
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Iron man is getting married

His welding is tomorrow and it’s with a fe-male. Apparently he was steel a bachelor and Tonys Spark led to an impromptu proposal and welding.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ssigea
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
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You know why frogs don't weld?

Because they still ribbet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/copper_wing
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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If Noah were to build a boat today, would it be steel?

Held together with ark welding.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2020
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Got my weld instructor last night

He was inspecting my tacks on a project and said "Real good tacks Steakfatt." I replied "would you say they are spec-TACK-uler?" He shook his head and walked away.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/steakfatt
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2015
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On vacation, my parents saw a "modern art installment" made of multiple brass instruments welded together ...

My dad told us the exhibition was entitled, "I'm so horny."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CosmicAutumn
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2014
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My wife had to sit through a presentation on galvanized steel

Wife: I got a free lunch today for watching a presentation on galvanized steel

Me: I hope they talk about joining a bunch of steel sheets together. That would be riviting.

Wife: I hate you

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tracebusta
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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I was caught breaking into a machine shop.

The owner said " Weld, weld, weld, what do we have here."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
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What does a Blacksmith say to his apprentice after he fuses metal.

Weld-done lad, weld-done.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/9ine0ne0ne
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2019
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Have you read the manual on connecting steel beams?

It's riveting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2018
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How do iron workers order their steak?

Weld done!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MBTAHole
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2017
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Last night I watched a documentary on how ships were built...

It was riveting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SimonDanziger
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2017
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My dad worked in sheet metal for many years. Now I work in a metal fabrication shop.

Guess you could say I come from a pretty weld to do family

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kowboooy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2015
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