The future, past and present had an argument...
It was in tense .
( you may have seen this post in r/jokes already because I posted it there too )
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︎ Jul 14 2021
What do you call it when you have an argument with a short person?
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︎ Aug 18 2021
My daughter, Ana, and her boyfriend had a long heated argument about what is and isn't counted as a fruit.
I told her she needed to let that mango. If things don't improve I might just have to banana from seeing him anymore.
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︎ Jul 15 2021
Apparently a lot of English people are getting into arguments over a local river. I heard them talking aboutβ¦
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︎ Jul 30 2021
A Russian man was killed last May when his wife sat on his face during an argument.
He died of ass-phyxiation.
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︎ Jun 27 2021
Two painters were in a heated argument on the street
They used a lot of colorful language.
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︎ Jul 22 2021
Yesterday, my friend and I got into an argument over which vowel was the best
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︎ Mar 28 2021
My wife says during an argument, βyou are so petty!β
She still wonβt tell me if she meant Richard or Tom.
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︎ Jun 28 2021
I always win arguments with my wife
She always falls for debate
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︎ Jun 02 2021
I once got into an argument with a decimal.
I have to admit he had a point.
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︎ May 14 2021
I got into an argument with a statue the other day...
and I have to admit it had some rock solid points.
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︎ Apr 11 2021
My wife and I had a 2 hour argument last night because I "have no sense of direction"
So I packed all my stuff and right.
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︎ Mar 17 2021
I got in argument with my butcher
Relax. It's just a local beef.
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︎ May 28 2021
Itβs not a drunk argument
Itβs a spirited discussion.
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︎ Apr 15 2021
My optometrist and I had a big argument.
After that, I just can't see going back there.
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︎ May 21 2021
My wife and I had a huge argument as to whose turn it was to do laundry.
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︎ Mar 06 2021
If two vegans get into an argument
Is it still considered beef?
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︎ Feb 13 2021
I got into an argument with my video game character
He said I was too controlling.
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︎ Apr 08 2021
Argument at family dinner...
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︎ Mar 23 2020
When arguments get silly
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︎ Jan 19 2021
I had an argument with my brother about how to get to the next floor in the mall because he refused to use the stairs or the elevator
My next thought was: "Well, that escalated quickly"
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︎ May 05 2021
My wife and I got into a heated argument where she told me I had to stop pretending to be a flamingo
So I had to put my foot down
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︎ Apr 19 2021
I had an argument with one of the seven dwarfs.
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︎ Mar 02 2021
me when I win an argument
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︎ Feb 06 2021
A lawyer finished his closing argument...
He then took out a pillow, put his bag on it, and covered the bag with a baby blanket. "What are you doing?" asked the judge. The lawyer replied, "I rest my case."
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︎ Apr 15 2021
After a heated argument, my kid shouted βJim Morrison was overratedβ
Me: What did I say about slamming The Doors?
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︎ Aug 30 2020
Two microwaves had an argument
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︎ Feb 22 2021
Every time I get my haircut I get into lengthy arguments with my barber.
The guy can really split hairs
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︎ Mar 31 2021
My wife and I had this weird argument as to which vowel is the most important.
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︎ Jan 06 2021
Is an argument between two vegans still called a 'beef'?
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︎ Jan 12 2021
I got into an argument with someone I thought was a "birds aren't real" supporter. I'm an idiot; they were just messing with me and they made some amazing bird puns along the way that deserve attention. The link to the post is in the comments so you can go give the user karma and see the context.
https://preview.redd.it/n7zvpwxkj6m51.png?width=1280&format=png&auto=webp&s=54f0549ebd3c055929698d6fef3bc05782bf5282
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︎ Sep 09 2020
Concrete
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︎ Apr 25 2021
I once got into an argument with a co-worker, who slammed the door so hard when he left, it broke the latch.
Which sucked, because I thought we needed the closure...
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︎ Feb 24 2021
I got into a heated argument with a snowman
in which he lost his cool and had a total meltdown
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︎ Jan 13 2021
Two guys were yelling at each other in a sauna.
It was a heated argument.
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︎ Aug 29 2021
My wife took off her shirt and bra during an argument where I was winning
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︎ Jun 27 2020
Did you hear that Steve Harvey got into an argument with his wife?
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︎ Jan 13 2021
My colleague claimed that vinegar is just the same thing as battery acid.
Such a baseless argument.
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︎ Aug 17 2021
Did you hear about the snowman that was killed?
He was murdered in cold blood.
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︎ Jul 29 2021
I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture...
But when I got home, the tables were turned...
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︎ Oct 12 2019
So I got in an argument yesterday
I told them itβs fine to be gangster, but βfuck bitches get moneyβ is a terrible motto for a veterinarian
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︎ Dec 27 2020
Just had an argument with a cloud.
We came to a thunderstanding.
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︎ Oct 25 2020
I just had an half hour argument with my 5 year old about the importance of wearing pants in public, and she won.
So today Iβm wearing pants to take her to school.
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︎ Dec 21 2018
If you're feeling depressed, change your name to "Morgan".
Then move to Germany.
You'll get some positive reinforcement every day until noon.
(Trying to find a way to format this so it sounds funny but i give up. Even jokes about Germans aren't funny)
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︎ Jul 02 2021
I got into an argument with a midget and he wanted a fight
But I refused because I was the bigger man
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︎ Nov 18 2020
I got into an argument with a cement mixer the other day.
I tried my hardest, but he had some real concrete evidence.
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︎ Nov 25 2020
Me and my wife got into an argument about how to contact an ancient Chinese dynasty...
She said...
"Talk to the Hans."
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︎ Nov 18 2020
Iβd like to highlight the important part of my argument
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︎ Aug 02 2020
My wife and I were having this huge argument as to whose turn it is to do laundry.
Finally, I threw in the towel.
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︎ Jul 10 2020
My wife and I had this huge argument as to which vowel is the most important.
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︎ Oct 18 2020
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