A list of puns related to "Annoys"
He said: "cells multiply by dividing"
A noisy noise annoys an oyster
Poke her face.
Toucan play at that game.
Erin go βbrahβ.
Or theyβll get ticked off.
I just canβt get over them
It might come back to haunt you!
Pearannoyed.
Erie guardless
Any ideas?
Age is clearly a word
They have little patients
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Did you hear about the magician who grabbed Eminem so hard his SnapBack fell off?
He pulled a rabbit out of his hat
What do you call a magician who is an administrator at a college, but nobody knows what students he is in charge of?
Whose deanβs he?
A magician went out to the store and bought a big metal structure so he could hang upside down and do situps. He also loved painting, but because of his style he often knocked the canvas around while dabbing on the paint. So he bought another, wooden structure, like an easel, but with clamps to hold the painting in place while he prodded it with the paintbrush. His wife asked, as he brought them in, what the hell he had just bought. He replied:
βAb rack and dab rackβ
What do you call a magician with very skinny fingers?
Slight of hand
The magicianβs wife brought him to the store to buy gifts for a birthday party. She picked out a lovely candle, but wanted to include a nice note. The magician knew just what to do. He brought her down an aisle, found a section marked βbirthday,β and said:
βPick a card, any cardβ
The Russian magician, in 1932, found an amazing new piece for his act: a giant, wooden sarcophagus in the shape of a beautiful woman. The piece had giant, metal blades inside at waist level. They were locked in place while it was open, but retracted as it closed, making it seem as though the magician had escaped death. But one day, while he was practicing, the great sarcophagus fell over - door still open - right on the magician. When he was found, he was cut right in two. Moral of the story:
In Soviet Russia, box woman saws you.
Okay thatβs it. Iβm so sorry, I have nothing better to do.
An askhole.
I didn't even laugh at first. I immediately asked if he'd heard it somewhere. He said he hadn't, that he'd come up with it on his own. When I asked him when he did that, he said it was when we were leaving for church (earlier that day). Then I had a good laugh.
I helped him tweak the setup a little, and then I had him tell his momma. I laughed even harder when she sat in stunned silence for a few seconds and then busted out laughing with her hands over her mouth.
We explained to him that while the joke was not wholly appropriate for his age, it most certainly was funny.
Itβs called Up 2: No good.
[cue confused looks]
"Because, today is a draggin'!" (dragon)
[cue "I hate you" looks and/or painful eye-roll]
Honestly, she can be such a buzzkill
A phew!
Aaaaphew!
Aphew!
Aphew!
Aphew!
Aphew!
Aphew!
^s^o^r^r^y
Aphew!
What a Joker!
Now it's all water under the fridge
When we began discussing what to dine on this evening, she says to me, "How about we have something for dinner that starts with a 'p' and ends with an 'a' and isn't pasta?"
I roll my eyes and groan animatedly.
"There is no way a single pea is going to feed all three of us!"
^^She ^^laughed ^^harder ^^at ^^that ^^than ^^any ^^of ^^my ^^previous ^^corny ^^jibes, ^^so ^^I ^^thought ^^I'd ^^share...
Credit /u/HauschkasFoot for his glorious AMA question the other day.
http://i.imgur.com/hCn7Y1H.jpg
Her (in a hurry to leave): Have you seen my bag?
Me: Yeah it's lovely.
When getting ready to leave the house:
"Dad can you put my shoes on?"
"They won't fit me"
And upon picking them up from school:
"How was Doris today"
"Dad, there is no one at school called Doris"
"Oh was she sick today?"
But now I realize toucan play that game.
But toucan play that game
I just canβt get over them.
An askhole.
I didn't even laugh at first. I immediately asked if he'd heard it somewhere. He said he hadn't, that he'd come up with it on his own. When I asked him when he did that, he said it was when we were leaving for church (earlier that day). Then I had a good laugh.
I helped him tweak the setup a little, and then I had him tell his momma. I laughed even harder when she sat in stunned silence for a few seconds and then busted out laughing with her hands over her mouth.
We explained to him that while the joke was not wholly appropriate for his age, it most certainly was funny.
Because Toucan play the game
Because toucan play at that game
Because toucan play at that game.
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