I'm going to start a yacht building business in my attic

Sails should go through the roof

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📅︎ Jan 28 2021
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I mean... I guess whatever floats your goat.
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📅︎ Jul 17 2019
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So I walked past a store in my hometown that sells only balloons

...and I thought to myself "what clowns are keeping this business afloat?"

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📅︎ Nov 27 2019
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Two livestock farmers were sat in the pub arguing over the government’s upcoming ban on exporting live animals...

The beef cattle farmer thought it was a silly policy and would greatly reduce his income from selling meat overseas....

The pig farmer disagreed, he thought it was a great opportunity for livestock farmers to benefit from higher profit margins in a strong domestic market with fewer overheads.

Feeling very passionate after a few beers, the beef farmer says to the pig farmer:

“This time in 12 months, the government will have repealed this policy because it’s such a terrible idea... in fact, I’m willing to bet on it. If I’m wrong, and they don’t repeal it, I’ll give you my prized cow, Daisy. But if I’m right, and they do repeal it, you have to give me free bacon for a year”.

The pig farmer is confident that the policy will be a success and won’t be repealed. So he says “deal”.

The beef farmer carries on:

“Actually, I think this policy is going to be such a terrible failure that I’ll need to sell half of my cows to stay afloat... in fact, I’m willing to bet on it. If I’m wrong, and this policy doesn’t mean I need to sell half my cows, I’ll give you free steaks for a year. But if I’m right, and I do need to sell half my cows, you have to give me your prized boar, pumba”.

The pig farmer is confident that the beef farmer won’t need to sell any cows. So he says “deal”.

12 months pass following the introduction of the live export ban. The government hasn’t repealed the policy, but unfortunately the beef farmer has had to sell most of his cows.

Both farmers reconvene at the pub. The beef farmer says to the pig farmer:

“Well, it seems you were right about one thing but wrong about the other...

So... You may have won the cattle, but you’ve lost the boar!”.

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👤︎ u/dens382
📅︎ Nov 02 2018
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I launched a seafaring business today.

I hope it stays afloat.

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📅︎ May 01 2018
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"Thank you"

"No you didn't, I'm thtill afloat."

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📅︎ Nov 18 2015
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