Winemaking cooperative Puns

Since the 1940s, the economic form of socialism in France has taken on a particular character. In 1949, PROF economic specialists have given the name "Socialisme dirigiste" to it, often shortened to simply "Dirigisme"

French economics is controlled by the Commissariat général du plan or the CGP, equivalent to the Soviet's State Planning Committee. The CGP is directed by two Ministries, the Ministry of Energy, Industry, and Infrastructure, and the Ministry of Labour. These two ministries direct the responsibilities of the CGP and the direction it should head in. The CGP practices united planning, a synthesis between Indicative planning and Directive planning, where indicative planning can guide markets and spot incidents of oversupply and undersupply. Alongside it, directive planning can produce quotas when necessary, based on indicative planning to ensure that quotas and directives are placed when best necessary for the economy.

Most large industries in France are nationalized. Military companies, banks (although Credit Unions/Caisse still exist and are run as a cooperative), energy and infrastructure companies (such as Gas de France), and other industries deemed necessary for social ownership under state direction. Car companies are also nationalized, and directives and prices are set to ensure that cars are affordable to the French public (with an emphasis on ensuring the rural population has easy to access, while Urban population is to focus on public transport. The main trade union in the country, the CGT, has a large say in nationalized enterprises and lower-scale collective industries.

Smaller industries, such as artisanal glassblowing or artisanal winemaking, has either been allowed to stay privately owned (there is the story of 1945, when Maurice Thorez personally helped Albi glassmakers receive coal for their furnaces when they had none before, this is now conducted on a larger scale, with Dirigisme and the CGP ensuring that local industry has the necessary materials for its propsering.) Also remaining private is things such as restaurants or stores (against the "Americanized" grocery store, the French still get their everyday consumer goods from local markets or local family-owned speciality shops, like butchers and bakeries.), which are once again taken into account in the CGP. However, the CGP ensures the artificially low price of things such as bread and other incredibly necessary provisions but allows for regular market prices

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

5396 words. 22-minute read. The maximum allowed by Alexis Ohanian.

##authorities use the new asset forfeiture law against a ranking NSS/penitentiary official over alleged embezzlement

The new law aims to recover embezzled property more easily, without throwing suspects in jail. If there is evidence of large-scale fraud, the investigators can ask the court for a warrant to investigate and to force the official to prove they did not steal the property.

The first such trial began in Yerevan. Per investigators, Serob Harutyunan and Anush Antonyan failed to prove they obtained the property legally, so the court is asked to confiscate their >$1 million house, garages, income from rent and car sales, company shared, and պոռճ PANAMERA.

One of the suspects is Col. Serob Harutyunyan, the former head of Nubarashen prison and a ranking NSS agent. Last year he was accused of cooperating with the ex-regime to illegally leak the personal records of a ruling party official to inflict political harm; the charges were later dropped.

https://armenpress.am/arm/news/1065865.html https://www.irazek.am/hy/news/3893 https://hetq.am/hy/article/128670

##prosecutors win a lawsuit brought by Serj Sargsyan's family who wanted to suspend the asset forfeiture investigation

Serj's brother Levon's adult children Narek and Ani are among those who are suspected of owning stolen properties. Levon is accused of embezzlement during the North-South construction.

Narek and Ani filed a lawsuit against the prosecutors but the court threw it away, finding that prosecutors had the right to launch an investigation.

https://armenpress.am/arm/news/1065921.html

##anti-corruption: NSS uncovered bribery by high-ranking IRS agents

NSS reports: last week, the head of IRS's Investigation and Operative Intelligence Department conspired with two agents to ignore violations by a Yerevan business in exchange for a ֏1M bribe. They took the bribe during a meeting at a cafe. The bribe givers and takers were immediately arrested. The investigation revealed that one of the suspects had 5 other bribery instances this year. In all, four IRS agents have been arrested. //

https://armenpress.am/arm/news/1065908.html

##municipal elections were held in 6 towns: ruling party gains 3, ex-regime loses all but 1

Dilijan (Tavush)

Pashinyan's QP won with 58% votes. They captured the city from Serj's HHK mayor who was charged with corruption in 2019.

Former Pashiny

Do your worst!

Your 11-minute Wednesday briefing in 2756 words.

##Armenia imported liquid oxygen stations to increase production to meet COVID demand / "clean room" for scientific research

The demand has never been this high, said the director of Physics Institute (National Science Laboratory) Ani Aprahamyan. On July 13 we learned that the NSL planned to import cryogenic equipment to produce liquid oxygen.

Ani Aprahamyan in July: the NSL was producing oxygen to the best of its abilities. Last year, at one point, we were supplying 95% of oxygen in Yerevan hospitals. The issue is with the center being 65 years old. Things would break often.

Our U.S.-based diasporan doctors and orgs helped modernize the station. It should work another 50 years. The new center will launch its operations on August 13 and will supply oxygen to all of Armenia.

We had to import the liquid oxygen from Georgia during the war. The new station will make us more self-sufficient. Besides that, the quality of the new oxygen is much better. It's good enough for scientific use. //

Aprahamian gave an update during an interview today. "The demand for oxygen has never been this high." Several facilities produce oxygen today.

Aprahamian: as of last December, NSL was producing 48% of Armenia's liquid oxygen. Other stations can also produce the gas. Hospitals produce 35-100L/hour. Ours produces 2,600L/day.

Liquid production is the most efficient with its high density, if you have the gasificator to turn it into gas. Last week the demand was 4x our production; we try to utilize the old station whenever possible so we hired new operators.

The new oxygen station was purchased recently from a Russian company Gleimash (?). They sent experts to retrain our workers.

Healthcare Ministry recently contacted us and wanted to take over the distribution process. Previously, hospitals would contact us directly for oxygen and pick it up. Now we give it to Ministry so they can distribute it where necessary.

This liquid oxygen and its gas can also be used for scientific purposes because it's 99.9% pure. You can use it in chemistry, the army, etc. Non-pure oxygen is sufficient for healthcare only. //

##Armenia is working on a Cleanroom lab / Ability to produce materials to help soldiers hide from enemy drones

National Science Laboratory director Ani Aprahamyan

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Buenosdillas

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

Nothing, he was gladiator.

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved

Him: I can explain everything!

(It's his best joke yet I think)

Bob

So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."

Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.

Just to clarify, 12345678

Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...

Notices there's only 2;

Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."

I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.

I was just sitting there doing nothing.

“BOOM”?!