My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.
So I have an uncle, once removed.
What did the drummer call his twin daughters?
I once dated a girl that had a twin. . .
People always asked how I could tell them apart but it was pretty easy.
Jessica had purple fingernails, James had a dick.
If I ever had identical twin daughters, I'd name the first one Kate....
......and the second one Duplikate.
So a mom and dad walk up to the register at work today holding baby twins.
I asked the mother if it was hard giving birth to two babies in one day.
She looked me dead in the eyes with a straight face and said, pointing at her husband, "not really. I had one and he had the other"
What do you call a waffle's evil twin?
My friend told me, “Your wife and daughter look like twins!”
I said, “Well, they were separated at birth.”
Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet.
Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
I know twin EMTs
You might say they are a paramedics
Why did one twin refuse to live with his brother?
Because he was a terrible womb-mate.
What do you call identical twins that join the police force?
I've been having an affair with my wife's siamese twin.
We're doing it behind her front.
Twin brothers just had a birthday
One turned twenty. The other turned twenty too.
(Trust me it works when you say it out loud)
I have a twin brother in prison
We finish each other's sentences.
What did the drummer name his twin daughters?
I read a story about twin brothers born with a single body and shared organs.
Age 6 they were separated in a successful 13hr surgery. Later in life they went to prison for armed robbery. They served 10yrs. Afterwards they wrote their book about being ex-con joined twins.
My friend Jay recently had twins, and want to name them after him.
So I suggested Kay and Elle.
My twins give me chills, dehydration, fatigue, fever, loss of appetite, and extreme diarrhea.
Their names are Sam and Ella.
What did the Hispanic firefighter name his twin sons?
I failed my Calculus exam because I was seated between two identical twins.
It was hard to differentiate between them.
Womb-mates is an acceptable term for twins
My brother just had twins so I invited him to join the group.
My friend just found out she will be giving birth to twins in 9 months!
For now, they're just cell mates.
My twin sister always takes the stairs, but I prefer taking the elevator.
I guess.... we are raised differently.
A man called his twin brother from prison
“Hey remember when we were kids and use to finish each other’s sentences?”
My wife told me that she was pregnant with twin girls.
I told her that I wanted to name the first one Kate. She asked what I wanted to name the second one. I answered Duplicate.
What do you call conjoined twins that have emotionally bonded?
My twin preschool boys were playing with foam letters in the bathtub.
One happened to put the letter T into a toy stacking cup I was holding. I tried to give it to him but he didn't want it.
So I turned to my other son and said, "Hmm, guess it's not his cup of T".
Neither 3yo got it so I had to tell someone.
My sister had twins, a boy and a girl, and asked for help naming them.
She liked my suggestion of calling the girl Denise, but had second thoughts when I suggested calling the boy Danephew.
What are male twins inside a pregnant woman called?
Why aren't high school twins afraid of getting mono?
Because they get stereo instead!
What did the drummer call his twin sons?
How did mama Moose differentiate between her twin son Moose?
If I ever had identical twin daughters, I'd name the first one Kate....
....and the second one Duplikate.
My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at work.
So, I have an uncle, once removed.
If I have twin daughters, I'll name one Kate
And I'll name the other DupliKate
Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mum only carries one photo......
...... because if you’ve seen Juan you’ve seen Amal
Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet.
Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
If I ever had identical twin daughters, I'd name the first one Kate....
........and the second one DupliKate.
My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.
So, I have an uncle once removed.
If I had twins I'd name the first one Bill
The second one is Doubill
What's the name of Kate's identical twin?
My dad was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.
I have an uncle, once removed.
What did the drummer name his twin daughters?
What did the drummer name his twin daughters?
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