A band should do a cover of The Knacks song My Sharona and call it My Corona.

It would be sick.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/G3ffr0
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2020
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Did you hear about the guy who keeps singing songs by The Knack?

He has the My Sharonavirus.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryanooooo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2020
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A Frog and a Bank Loan

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation." Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.

The frog says $30,000.

The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.

Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone"

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bstie
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2021
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A Mafia hit-man was arrested for killing a man in a rice field with a porcelain figurine.

The police said this is the first known case of a knick knack paddy whack

πŸ‘︎ 93
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NeGuy1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
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A frog walks into a bank for a loan.

All he has for collateral is a ceramic statue. The loan officer, Patty Black, is unsure of what to do so she consults with her supervisor; "Oh fine", he says. "It's a knick knack Patty Black, give the frog a loan."

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Remo1975
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2020
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One day, Kermit the Frog was a little short on cash, so he went to the bank to speak to a loan officer...

When he got there, a woman extended her hand.

"Good afternoon, sir," she said. "My name is Patricia Wack. How may I help you today?"

Kermit replied, "Hi-ho, Patricia! I'm Kermit the Frog, and I would like to borrow some money."

They walked over to her desk and sat down.

"Certainly, Mr. Frog--"

"Oh, just call me Kermit."

"Okay... Kermit. How much money would you like to borrow?"

"Ten thousand dollars."

Mildly surprised, Ms. Wack looked intently at Kermit.

"Do you have any references?"

"Well, I suppose I could use my father, Keith Richards."

Ms. Wack froze for a second, then...

"THE Keith Richards?"

"Oh, yes. In fact, he told me he's friends with your manager, which is why I came in here."

"Okay... Do you have any collateral?"

"Excuse me?"

"Collateral. Something of value, like a car, or a boat..."

"Oh, yes! I do have something. I have this."

Kermit reached into his briefcase and placed a small figurine on the desk. Patricia looked curiously at the object, then at our amphibious friend.

"What's this?"

"It's a Hummel."

"A what?"

"A Hummel. They're supposed to be quite valuable. Well, at least this one is to me."

She picked up the Hummel and stood up.

"If you don't mind, I would like to show this to the manager."

"Oh, no! I don't mind at all!"

So, Patricia took the Hummel to the manager's office, knocked on the door, and walked inside.

"Patricia! What can I do for you?"

"Mr. Wilson, there's this... frog named Kermit at my desk, and he wants to borrow $10,000, but he has only this for collateral."

Mr. Wilson looked at the Hummel, then out to her desk.

"I don't see anything out of order here."

"But, Mr. Wilson--"

"Look, it's a knick-knack, Patty Wack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/norrisrw
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2019
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Did you hear about the man who beat his friend with a stolen trinket in the rice fields?

Apparently, it was the first ever case of a knick-knack-paddy-whack.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Asian_dodo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
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A frog walks into a bank.

He approaches the teller, Ms. Ursula Paddywhack. He says he needs a loan.

"What for?" asks the teller.

"I want to build a house," the frog replies. "Nothing too fancy, but I want $20,000."

"Do you have any collateral?" asks the teller.

The frog takes out a small crystal horse. "Would this be enough?"

"No, that's not enough," the teller replies. "Do you have anything else?"

"My father is Keith Richards," says the frog.

The teller, unsure what to do, goes to the bank manager. She describes the entire situation and asks for advice. The manager says,

"It's a knick-knack, Paddywhack. Give the frog a loan! His old man's a Rolling Stone."

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItsNinety
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
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A frog hops into the credit union and meets with his loan officer, Ms. Black. She asks if he has any collateral for the loan?

The frog pulls out a small weird shaped item, made of ceramic. Ms. Black isn’t sure what to make of it, so she asks her manager. He takes one look at the item, and says, β€œWhy that’s a knick knack Patty Black, give that frog a loan!”

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamkeerock
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
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A gangster recently plead guilty for beating a cow to death in a rice field using two porcelain figures.

Authorities say it’s the first first time they’ve ever dealt with a knick knack patty wack.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Adamkm92
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2018
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asking for a loan

Mr. Sterling Frogsen was desperate. After a few months of success, his bakery was beginning to flounder and running in the red. He was a proud man who was proud of starting his small business without asking for any help. But now times were tough and he had to face the fact that without a loan his bakery was doomed.

So he went to local bank but was disheartened to see that the loan officer was the notorious Patricia Wacomb, the hard-nosed banker who only agreed to sure bets and rarely took risks.

"Please, ma'am, I am in sore need of this loan! My bakery is only going through a temporary setback!" Normally such pleas fell on deaf ears, but today Patricia was feeling generous. Something about Mr. Frogsen moved her and she believed his plight.

"Mr. Frogsen, I would approve this loan, but this bank cannot afford to take any risks."

"Is there anything you can do, Ms. Wacomb? I am desperate!"

"Well, do you have any collateral?"

"Only this family heirloom," Sterling responded while handing Patricia his prized family treasure. Patricia was at a loss, however, for she had never seen anything like that before.

"Let me ask my manager," she responded as she showed her director the prized heirloom. His eyes opened wide in amazement as he told her,

"It's a knick-knack, Patty Wack, now give the Frog a loan!"

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mxwp
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2017
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The mafia killed a man in a rice field today because of a dispute over a small trinket

It is the first documented case of a knick-knack paddy whack.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ValkornDoA
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2018
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So kermit the frog walks into a bank...

He walks up to the teller. Her nametag says "Patricia Wak". He says, "Hey there, Patty, I'd like a loan." She replies, "Okay, for how much?"

"Ten dollars."

"I'm sorry, but I can't authorize that."

"Really? Well, what if I give you this?"

He hands her a clam with a top hat and googly eyes.

"Um... What is this?"

"Alright, alright. What if I told you my dad was Mick Jagger?"

"I can't give you a 10 dollar loan, it's simply against policy."

"Alright, I'll tell you what. Go talk to your manager, and bring the clam with you. He'll let you give me a loan."

Patricia walks into the back office and tells the manager the story. He immediately says "Alright, give him the loan."

"I'm sorry, but why this time?"

"Well (picking up the clam), it's mainly because of this, and also because of his dad."

"What is it exactly?"

"It's a knick knack, Patty Wak, give the frog a loan! His old man's a rolling stone!"

My dad's favourite.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hylandw
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2013
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Amphibious Lending policies

A frog walks into a bank. He walks up to a desk and sees the name plate "Patty Whack Loan Officer". He says "I'd like to get a loan to start a business making lily-pad art." Patty, a little put off by a talking frog says "Okay, but we are going to need some kind of collateral." The frog says"I have this." and he puts a small porcelain figurine on her desk. She says "That's very nice but I'm not sure it's enough. Do you have any references?" "Sure!" the frog replies. "My Father is Mic Jager!" Further taken aback, Patty says, "I'll have to check this with the bank manager." She calls the bank manager over and explains the odd situation. "I don't know what's going on...this frog says his father is Mic Jager and all he has for collateral is this...figurine thing." The bank manager looks up and smiles at her and says "It's a knick-knack, Patty Whack, give the frog a loan! His old man's a rolling stone!"

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quicksdraw
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2014
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My dad's personal favorite.

So this frog walks into a bank looking for a business loan and sits down with a banker, miss Wak. "I'm afraid in order for this loan to go through you may be required to put forth some collateral." To which the frog replies, "Well Patty, I do have one thing I could offer." He then proceeds to offer up a small trinket, says it's been in his family for generations. Unsure if it was enough, she excused herself to consult with her manager. After a short debate between the two her manager finally exclaimed, "It's a knick knack Patty Wak, give the frog a loan!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lawliet1979
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2016
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I'll never learn his secret

My dad has a knack for sleight of hand. Every time he does a magic trick, the same thing happens...

Me (in awe): How did you do that? Dad (grinning): Very well!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lauradhahn
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2013
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Heard this one just moments ago...

So a frog walks into a bank to get a car loan. He walks over to Patricia Wack, who happened to be the loan officer. "Ms. Wack I would like to get a car loan, but I want the title in my name." Ms. Wack asks the frog if has any sort of collateral. He replis "well, all I have is this is this token I got from the Grand Canyon." Patricia tells him there is no way she can take that. Irritated the frog asks the see the manager, so Patricia calls the manager over and explains the situation. The manager looks at the frog, then the token, then Ms. Wack and proclaims, "That's a knick knack Patty Wack give the frog a loan."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/92sideoffries
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2014
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Awful form dad...

My Dad has thrown me some pretty good/bad dad jokes in his time... but yesterday he sat me down on the couch and started telling me about a frog who couldn't get a loan from the bank. He looked really concerned and it went something like this...

"... so this frog really just wants a loan, and decides to try one last time. He walks up to the teller, a Mrs Patricia Wak. P.W: Hello sir what can I do for you? F: I'm just after a $30,000 loan. Can you help P.W: Wow, that's a really large loan. What collateral do you have? F: Just this little toy elephant (pulls out from pocket) P.W: I'm afraid that's not going to secure the loan, sir. Do you have anything else? F: No P.W: Well them I'm afraid we can't help you

And the frog starts to well up and cry, he starts howling inconsolably and is an absolute mess F: You don't understand! I need this loan! Please, my name is Froggy Jagger. I come from a long line of Jaggers, my father Mick is good for the money now please help me! P.W: I'm sorry but a little toy elephant is never going to secure you... F: I want to see a manager!!

So Patricia Wak goes and gets her manager, and the frog tells the man about his need for a $30,000 loan. The manager agrees and pulls Patricia aside to explain why...

P.W: I don't understand this guy, what's the deal with the little elephant? M: It's a knick-knack, Patty Wak! Give the frog a loan! His old man's a rolling stone!

Dad then proceeded to slap his knee and laugh wildly while I stood up and walked away.

(I think this joke makes a lot more sense if you're an Australian...)

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/siqsadworld
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2013
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A Frog and a Bank Loan

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation." Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.

The frog says $30,000.

The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.

Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone"

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bstie
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2021
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A hit-man was arrested for killing a man in a rice field with a porcelain figurine.

The police said this is the first known case of a knick knack paddy whack.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiny_spring
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
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I notified police after finding dozens of smashed porcelain figures in a rice paddy

They said it was the first known case of a knick knack paddy whack.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LowInFat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
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A frog goes to get a loan...

The frog is greeted by the teller whose name is Patty Whack. The frog asks Patty for a loan, patty tells the frog to get the loan she will need a reference and a form of collateral. The frog says β€œwell my father is Mick Jagger and I have a small porcelain elephant that I can give you. Patty says β€œI’ll need to speak with my manager” and leaves to the back. When Patty returns the frog asks β€œwhat did the manager say?” and she tells the frog the manager said β€œIt’s a Knick-knack Patty Whack, give the frog a loan, his old man is a Rolling Stone!”

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/my-little-puppet
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
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A Mafia hit-man was arrested for killing a man in a rice field with a porcelain figurine.

The police said this is the first known case of a knick knack paddy whack.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rockstorm8232
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2019
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A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller

He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a vacation."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"

.

.

.

The bank manager looks back at her and says...

"It's a knick-knack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

πŸ‘︎ 588
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πŸ‘€︎ u/goboatmen
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2013
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