Guess that's what I get for using Dolly pegs.
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
He said, “Wow, that’s the worst case of parking son’s disease I’ve ever seen.”
The difference is staggering.
It’s starting to become a running joke at this point
The executioner left him hanging.
Why was the cookie sad?
His mother was a wafer so long
And suddenly I’m the idiot....
Because Logan Paul left him hanging!
I couldn't turn it down.
As my son have me my 50th birthday card, I said " You know, i would have been happy with one"
😁😆😅🤣😂🙃
Then I got tired so I picked up the block and put it back in the toy box!
(Five-year-old) I'm a fun guy, so they would eat me.
Apparently I exceeded the maximum number of attempted Loggins.
But Seal Team Six got the job done!
I took my piggy bank to the five and dime store and they told me they didn't take any thing under a dollar...
A policy like that just makes no cents...
My wife yelled at him to close it immediately, as it wasn’t safe in a moving vehicle. I told her it wasn’t a big deal since both of our vehicles have umbrella insurance.
The kids didn’t get it but it elicited a nice groan from the wife, so I’m pretty sure it counts.
...so I told her that her mom saw a few hairs fall out of her head and freaked out.
My daughter responds, completely deadpan, "mom had rabbits falling out of her head?"
She's going to be a great dad one day.
Edit: skipped a word
After a few hours of debate, no one was willing to concede, and it was decided that a vote must be held. Unfortunately, with so few friends present, it was clear that they would need to bring the vote to the greater public. The group decided that each friend would make a plea to the subreddit of their choice, and whoever received the most karma for it would win.
Adam, already undecided himself, decided to go to /r/AskReddit. He laid out the agreement, and asked that everyone vote one their favorite movie, and the one with the most votes he would use for the his friends. Unfortunately, as the votes were split in that sub, his highest post amounted to a mere 38 points.
Paul, a big proponent for the Toy Story franchise, posted to /r/nostalgia in the hopes that everyone who grew up with Toy Story would agree. Unfortunately, as there had been two sequels (with a third on the way) it wasn't exactly considered "nostalgia" and he got downvoted into oblivion.
Bill, who loved Monsters Inc., made his case using some trickery. Going to /r/news, he found a seemingly unrelated post, and made a top-level comment describing, in great detail, why Monsters Inc. was the greatest film of all time. The fact that the post was so out of context made everyone flock to it, and drew enough attention to new him over a thousand fake internet points.
Mike, who loved the Incredibles movies, decided to stay in his wheelhouse. Over the course of several hours, he created each of the family members from the Incredibles in Soulcaliber VI. Finally, he photoshopped the family together, and posted it to /r/gaming. Under normal circumstances this would have skyrocketed to the top, but the format was stale, and thus only received 20k karma. Still, Mike was confident in his victory.
While the other four friends came up with plans on how to maximize their karma gains, Chris sat silently. For hours he sat, making no posts, coming up with no original content. Finally, an hour before the deadline, he broke into his neighbor's house, stealing his copy of the Pixar movie "Up". He took a picture of his theft and posted it directly to /r/dadjokes with the title "STOLEN".
When the group got together the next day to see who got the most votes, everyone was in awe. Chris's post had over 40,000 points. "How did you know that would win?" "Easy," Chris replied. "Everyone knows stolen content on /r/dadjokes gets all the Up votes."
You would think he'd learn to duck under it by now...
Is it called Nahtzee?
It was a Torahnt.
"Five penises!!" he said "How do your trousers fit"
"Like a glove" I said
Cause logan Paul Left them hanging
They were Fibonacci sequins
Sadly, no pun in ten did.
the sense of humor
The difference is staggering.
The difference is staggering
And suddenly I’m the idiot.....
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
The difference is staggering.
I was so tired afterwards that my son had to put it back into the toy box.
"Like a glove."
It's a 35 minute walk from the pub to my house.
The difference is staggering.
The difference is Staggering.
His pants fit like a glove
