That girl with only fans used to be really hot
Until she got an air conditioner.
A girl with three cats told me that she wanted to get another cat
I was confused why she wanted a hat made of forks
I once told a girl that her body was shaped like a ketchup bottle.
She took it as a condiment.
I once dated a girl that had a twin. . .
People always asked how I could tell them apart but it was pretty easy.
Jessica had purple fingernails, James had a dick.
I want to tell you about a girl that ate plants
but you've probably never heard of herbivore!!
My son asked, "Dad, every time I talk to girls, I get butterflies in my stomach! What should I do?!" I gently put my arm around him and replied, "That's easy son..."
"Stop eating caterpillars!"
So the doctor sat me down and gently revealed to me me that my child is a boy trapped in a girls body...
...Until my wife gives birth that is. Only three more months to go!
Me: I me this girl with a dozen breasts My friend: that sounds strange...
what do you call a dozen girls named monica that produce music?
someone asked me why i'm dating a girl that works as a typist
i said she's just my type.
I once dated two girls called Edith and Kate. Kate found out and told Edith that I was dating both of them at the same time. They both broke up with me on the very same day!
Moral of the story is you can’t have your Kate and Edith too
It has been scientifically proven that girls reach the age of puberty earlier than boys. Girls develop boobies around the age of thirteen...
...and boys develop them around the age of forty…
Recent studies have shown that roughly 80% of goth girls in our country's high schools enjoy reading parenting magazines.
Strangely enough, they mostly only read the daddy issues.
There's a girl group that consist of failed fashion models.
They are called One Expression
A little girl turns to her mother and asks, "What is that rasta man cooking behind us?"
The mother turns around to look and says, "I don't know sweetie. What Jamaican?"
My wife told me that she was pregnant with twin girls.
I told her that I wanted to name the first one Kate. She asked what I wanted to name the second one. I answered Duplicate.
More stock photo puns from this silly site😃😃 Is that the girl from distracted boyfriend?
[ Removed by reddit in response to a copyright notice. ]
I told this girl I was talking to that I like to race cars, she asked me if I win often
I said no, the cars are much faster
I was talking to a girl that had alot on her chest...
... she said it was good to talk abou tit
I once fell in love with a girl that only knew 4 vowels.
Unfortunately she didn't know I existed.
I tried learning about all the different kinds of aircraft but I quickly found out girls didn’t like that basic personality trait
They thought I was such a plane guy
I met a girl on tinder whose bio said she used to work at a meat packing plant and that she'd heard all the jokes before...
So I asked her out on a date for the weekend but to let me know by Friday if she had to can salami.
(Cancel on me)
I proclaimed to my wife that the world does not revolve around our little girl. Perturbed, she shot back, "Why on Earth would you ever say that!?" I explained, "Well, it's really quite simple you see, she's our daughter..."
What do you call a south American girl that's always in a hurry?
Did I ever tell you about the girl that only ate plants?
I can't believe I never mentioned herbivore.
If a girl thinks long and hard enough about becoming an e-girl, does that make her thotful?
I ran into a girl at a vegetarian restaurant that said she new me
But I've never met herbivore
I was driving this girl to her house and told her that I wasn't good with directions, she laugh at me...
So I just right her left there.
I just discovered that Cardi B's mother was one of the Spice Girls.
I knew this girl who wanted bigger boobs, but couldn't afford proper implants, so she had her uncle make her a false set out of pine.Would be great if I had a punchline to go with that though,
Would be great if I had a punchline to go with that though, wooden tit?
“There’s a puppy on that girls shirt.”
That little girl must have had a long day because she looks bushed
Did you hear about that girl who thought she was a small sailboat?
She's just a little dinghy.
A couple expecting a baby girl made a long list of possible names for a girl child, but only one name in the event that they have a boy. They ended up having a boy.
He was named Justin Case.
If the family that popularized gull-winged doors had a baby girl, and they wanted to name her in honor of Star Wars...
She could be Amanda Mandalorian DeLorean
How will a tomato seller will tell his girl that he likes her ?
Seller : I like you from my head TO-MA-TOES
What do you call a girl that looks like a guy?
You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and say, "That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you.
You have died of dissin' Terry.
You’re traveling the Oregon Trail and you meet a man named Terry. You say “Terry? That’s a girls name!” He pulls out his gun and shoots you.
You have died from dissin’ Terry
A Nine year old girl has gone missing after using moisturiser that makes you look 10 years younger
Turns out that , the curvy girl I knew died yesterday . What a waist!
My son asked, "Dad, every time I talk to girls, I get butterflies in my stomach! What should I do?!" I gently put my arm around him and replied, "That's easy son..."
"Stop eating caterpillars!"
It has been scientifically proven that girls reach the age of puberty earlier than boys…
Girls develop tits around the age of thirteen, boys develop them around the age of forty…
I want to tell you all about a girl that only ate plants.
You've probably never heard of herbivore.
I wanna tell you a joke about a girl that only eats plants...
But you’ve probably never heard of herbivore
I once told a girl that her body was shaped like a ketchup bottle.
She took it as a condiment.
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