What if pigs could fly?

They could be employed to float aerial advertising banners, but they would likely be porcine carriers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bardbelle
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
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Some good puns

What do you call a "Can Opener" that doesn't works ?

-A "Can't Opener" !

Why are famous people so cool ?

-Because of their "Fans" !

Why did the man work in the barn his whole life ?

-Because it was a "Stable" carrier !

I hope you guys enjoyed !

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ParsaSamimi
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
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I really hope mailmen don’t start getting the Coronavirus

They’re really good carriers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/danceswithshrews
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
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Did you guys hear about AT&T and Verizon dropping out of an upcoming conference due to corona virus concerns?

It’s probably a good thing considering they’re both well-known carriers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dizmodo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
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What's a rubber gasket on an aircraft carrier called?

A Navy Seal.

Credit to /u/Repulzz for their post.

I wasn't sure on the crossposting rules, but I really thought this joke was r/dadjokes material.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Seanpkd30
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2018
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At our town's 4th of July fireworks show, a vendor was selling pet turtles. My wife, impulsive animal lover that she is, bought one.

After the fireworks, we were gathering up our things to leave. She asked if her new turtle was OK. I picked up its little carrier, peered inside, and said, "It looks a little shell-shocked."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlmostDisjoint
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2017
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One honeydew says to two young melons in love...

you cantaloupe!

Seriously though, this is a two-fer. I was putting a watermelon in a carrier box in the car, saying "There you go little guy, you'll be safe in your own box". My SO rolls her eyes and says 'stop it'.

I say, "What, I can't be melondramatic?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Someoneoldbutnew
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2014
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What language were 19th-Century messages sent in?

Carrier Pidgin

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2014
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My wife is changing her phone number

My wife and I changed cell carriers, so we have new temporary numbers but when the caller ID comes up, both numbers my name because I set up the account. She called me today...

> Me: Oh my name comes up when you call on the caller id > > Her: You'll have to change that > > Me: Yeah I'll have to fix your faux number

(blank stare)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nyran20
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2015
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My daughter made me proud with this dad-joke.

The whole family is together at the dinner table and my brother had just gotten a new cat. Instead of letting the cat get into trouble he opted to put it in the cat carrier while we ate. Sneaky little thing got out of it's carrier and my daughter blurts out, "Well the cat's out of the bag!" ^I'm ^so ^proud. ^^tear

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hanktank
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2014
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Woman marries a funeral director

Just saw this on facebook...

A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. The following day she was being interviewed by a local TV station, and the commentator asked about what it felt to be married again at that age and would she share part of her previous experiences, since it seem quite unique the fact that her new husband was a β€˜funeral director.’ After a short time to think, a smile came to her face and she proudly explained that she had first married a banker when she was in her twenties, in her forties she married a circus ring master, and in her sixties she married a pastor and now in her eighties, a funeral director. The amazed commentator asked her why she had married men with such diverse carriers. With a smile on her face she explained, β€˜I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.’

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sir_mrej
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2014
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