My son wrote s symphony about not caring if your car's tire has no air...

It's written in the key of B flat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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I was asked to play the triangle in our local symphony orchestra! But I quit because . . .

It was just one ting after another.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/urkdor73
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
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I spelled out the first part of a symphony using only AEIOU

I call it the vowel movement.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JonnySwo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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Why did the nurse get second chair in the symphony?

Because they were a Band-Aid

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anakin_I_am_on_PC
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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Did you know that, while alive, Mozart composed symphonies in almost every major key?

Sadly, in death, he was relegated only to D-composition.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hsdad
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
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Why is Beethoven's 5th Symphony the Martian national anthem?

Dome Dome Dome DOME, Dome Dome Dome DOME...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aqua_zesty_man
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2020
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Don’t get Dad onto Schubert’s Symphony No 8...

...you’ll never hear the end of it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Merulius
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2020
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Little known fact: Beethoven wrote nine symphonies.

And not one of them wrote back.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jalfredproofrock
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2020
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I dont let my children listen to symphonies

there is too much sax and violins in it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ovi2wise
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2019
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I disapprove of symphony orchestras.

Too much sax and violins.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/89iroc
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2019
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Only works for the Turd Symphony.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2018
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The Seattle Symphony is playing Beethoven's 9th.

In the version they're doing, the bass section plays a bit at the start, then just sits there til the final part of the last movement. So, they decide to leave the concert and go out for drinks.

While at the bar down the street, they meet a European nobleman, and they become good friends. Unfortunately, the guy had been gorging himself on crappy bar food, and he quickly falls into a food coma.

One of the basses drunkenly checks his watch and says, "crap! We're not going to get back on stage in time!" As they're sprinting back, one of them says, "actually, I thought this would happen, so I tied some of the pages of the conductor's score together - that way, he'll have to slow the tempo way down with his right hand while undoes the knots with his left!"

And so they get back just in time to finish the Symphony, and the audience is none the wiser. The conductor, however, was furious.

After all, they'd left him at the bottom of the 9th, with the score tied, while the basses were loaded, and the Count was full.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PhantomImmortal
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
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Why did the symphony conductor come home with all the wrong groceries?

He forgot the Chopin Liszt

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sztormy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
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What is Mozart's shortest symphony?

His thirty-second symphony

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Amessersmith109
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2017
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What do zombie symphony composers do? offhandcomics.com/zombie-…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScoobyD00
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2013
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How do you call a symphony orchestra?

Euphonium.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maskedeee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2016
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A symphony of groan.

At the dinner table.

Mother in law: "...he has recently had two surgeries to fuse his lower vertebrae, his recovery has been quite slow"

Me: "Well I would expect nothing less after having back to back operations."

after about 4 seconds people started leaving the table.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mactonite
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2014
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What do you call a symphony comprised mostly of pigs?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rotanikleb
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2015
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Why did the man bring yogurt to the symphony?

He wanted to be more cultural!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/K20_FTW
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2017
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The Symphony just played Chopin in four movements

I've never been Scherzo in all my life.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lindleyw
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2014
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Say, son, can you tell me what the bovine symphony makes?

Moosic.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cloudburst_
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2014
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Beethoven wrote nine symphonies. And not one of them wrote back.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jalfredproofrock
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
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