A list of puns related to "Shock cooling"
A police officer walks into a tattoo parlor, hoping to get something cool drawn onto his shoulder. He walks up to the artist and shows him a picture of what he wants. In large text on a ribbon it says, "Protect and Serve." Below it, is a picture of a a badge, a pair of handcuffs, and a pistol. The tattoo artist is very good at his job, and says he can get this done in one session, so the officer sits down and the artist gets started. A few hours later, the artist is just finishing up, inking the last details of his service weapon. Once the last line is inked on the trigger, the cop gets up from his chair and looks in the mirror to see his new tattoo. His face twists into a look of shock and terror, pulls out his gun and opens fire onto the tattoo artist, killing him in the process. He gets on his radio, calling for backup, and took a defensive position until a few more cops and the police chief showed to the parlor minutes later. The chief, while examining the scene asks the officer, "What the hell? Why did you shoot this guy?" The cop says, "What did you expect me to do? The guy drew a gun on me!"
The funniest and shortest puns for kids, you always remember while teaching children puns, try to choose the short ones because they are easy for them to remember and register.
Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A pie-thon!
Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.
What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the court room? Odor in the court!
Two silkworms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.
The streets in the capital of Afghanistan are paved with Kabulstones.
How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? Pleased to eat you.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn? An egg roll!
No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.
Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
What musical is about a train conductor? “My Fare, Lady”.
A man drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
What animals are on legal documents? Seals!
Why did the lion spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny!
Why did the bumble bee leave the house? It heard the school was having a spelling bee.
Being struck by lightning is really a shocking experience!
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans!
Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
Dockyard: A physician’s garden.
What did the angry mother say to the boiling pot of spaghetti? Simmer down!
The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.
“What’s purple and 5000 miles long?” “Ooh! I know! The Grape Wall of China!”
Every calendar’s days are numbered.
This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. “Four bucks,” says the bartender. “Put it on my bill.”
I used to be twins. My mother has a picture of me when I was two.
What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouch!
When does a well-dressed lion look like a weed? When he’s a dandelion (dandy lion).
Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a-salted.
A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is
... keep reading on reddit ➡I´m not really sure if this fits here, but it´s a hilarious story.
A Year ago my Father, mother, brother and me were driving to lunch(or breakfast), when we came to an intersection. This intersection has seen alot of accidents over the years, because people don´t give a fuck and just turn in. Long story short: A guy almost crashes his van into our car. It all went really fast. My dad shouted, hit the brakes and with a screeching sound we halted. The van just drove on and was before us. My dad muttered something like: "That´s it!" and overtook the van. He stopped infron of said van and got out.(Sidenote: We are all tall in my family. my little brother is a little over 2 meters and is really buff. I´m just 2 meters tall and my dad is a little smaller than me. My mum is the smallest of the bunch with just 1,86 or so) So my dad gets out of the car and starts shouting at the guy in the van. My father is a real pacifist and hates violence of any form, so we all were really shocked. I look over to my brother and say:"We gotta hold him back he´s gonna rip that guys head off!". So we both got out and the guy starts trembling behind his steering wheel, when suddenly a giant stands infront of his car shouting and hitting and kicking the air, while 2 larger giants hold him back (barely though) and try to sooth him. My mother gets out goes over to the guys windows points him to let it down and say:"You´re lucky my sons are with us, otherwise we wouldn´t be having this conversation." She goes back to my father tells him to cool down and we all get back in the car. The guy in the van looks frozen at us and doesnt move a muscle. Remeber we are still on the street holding up the entire intersection, so cars start honking. It´s then i hear my dad laughing and saying:" You didn´t think i was gonna do anything did ya?" We didn´t spoke to him for the rest of the ride, but later at lunch(or breakfast) we all laughed about it.
TL;DR: 3 Giants teach a man not to speed.
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