I tried to give the guy who came to clean our septic tank out a beer. He said, β€œI’m not the type of guy who drinks on the job.”

I said, β€œYeah, you wouldn’t want you’re boss to catch you shit faced.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gun_God
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2020
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Sign on the back of a Septic Tank truck:

"Caution – This truck is full of Political Promises"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tfowler11
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2019
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If you accidentally fail into a septic tank...

Urine deep shit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dudecancode
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2018
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We are selling my house. I told my wife that the buyers want to pump and inspect our septic tank. My wife looks at me and says,

"I guess they don't want us to leave any of our crap."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/japhillips87
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2017
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Told my dad it cost me $1200 to get my septic tank emptied

He said "no shit"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ICYURNVS86
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2016
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I clean septic tanks for a living.

It's a pretty crappy job.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRtHonLaqueesha
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2016
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So I saw a Septic Tank replacement Truck with a slogan that could only have been made by a dad

"We're number 1 in the number 2 business!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jackorig
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2013
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Dad joke escalation

Dad was visiting last week, talking about his household projects he did. He mentioned that he got his septic tank emptied before winter, and that 'it was a shitty job'. He then tells me that his neighbor also had to get his tank emptied, so the service truck also emptied the neighbor's tank at the same time. He smiles and says, "Well, my neighbor and I finally got our shit together!"

He said he was very proud of himself for making an original pun like that. I patted him on the shoulder, looked him in the eye and said, "I can always appreciate an organic pun."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fish-Dead
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2016
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So, we took our pig to the processor today.

Son: He will live on with us in spirit, at least.
Me: Well, for a few months, but then he can live on in spirit out in the septic tank.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Grimsterr
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2017
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