Why can’t Satan’s cheerleading squad win any competitions?

Because they have literally no chants in Hell.

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JiminyKirket
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between Satan and Santa?

They're a letter apart.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife sees Satan every weekend for evil lessons.

I have no idea how much she charges.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadeauxmarie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What is Satan’s favorite city in America?

Sin-sin-atti

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/andytheg
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the name of Satan's long lost brother?

Sacos and Sasin.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Magnusfeli
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Satan 10% form
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Never get caught behind Satan in line at the post office.

The Devil has many forms

πŸ‘︎ 44
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFishmanau
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Friend: ...my wife is uncomfortable with them because they’ve joined the church of Satan. Like, he showed me his membership card. They’re paid members, man.

Me: well; someone has to pay the devil’s dues

Friend: damn it.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jubaliya
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
If satan had ever lost his hair

There would be hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kibydoge
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
If anyone dares to make fun of Satan's hairpiece

there will be Hell Toupee

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SayLittleDoMuch
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does satan hate geometry?

Too many angles πŸ˜‡

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Eagle4523
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A nagging wife yelling at her husband "I would rather married Satan than marrying you"

Husband, "legally a brother and sister can't get married"

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mougy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I can't say for satan, but I reckon he's born to play the part
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dolphinville
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can't redheads be in blues or jazz bands?

They got no soul.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PNWKiwi
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
If Satan ever goes bald and gets a hairpiece

there will be hell toupee.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SayLittleDoMuch
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What technology powers Satan's car?

The infernal combustion engine

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DatJayblesDoe
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Oh satan
πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Chanureadeats
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Satan was really mad when he went bald.

There was hell toupee.

πŸ‘︎ 44
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Couldbeurmom
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I’m writing a book about a guy who sells shoe parts to satan. It’s your basic β€œSold my sole to the devil” novel.
πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a satanic rodent?

A sinchilla.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fort_one-e
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did Satan go to the gym?

To get a 666 pack.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cjgobo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the dyslexic elf get fired?

He kept writing "From Satan" on children's New Year presents.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WardensLantern
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
How did you know Satan was going to Europe?

The flight from SIN to HEL vanished in Finnair.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Captainjbao
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear satan got a new hair piece?

It’s hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JezyJezyJezy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Spanish Satan ate too much sugar

Now he has Diabloetes

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/piratecheese13
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Bff sent this. I believe this belongs here.
πŸ‘︎ 118
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BtsIsMyCupOfTae
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Thinking of becoming a Satan worshiper

Just for hell of it.

πŸ‘︎ 856
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kopextacy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2016
🚨︎ report
I've invented a gaming console designed to help you summon Satan...

I'll call it the occult rift

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/N64GC
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What do satanic baseball players from Queens, NY call their communal showers?

Bath o’ Mets

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/J0h4n50n
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the name of Satans wig shop?

Hells toupee

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dysfantuacl22
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
🚨︎ report
If number 666 is evil,

then 25.8069758011 is the root of all evil.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What does satan eat for breakfast?

Deviled eggs.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ScottManleyFan
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What will happen when Satan will put videos on youtube?

They will get demonitized.

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tamer_
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did Satan tear the shoe in half?

Cause he just wanted the sole.

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2018
🚨︎ report
If Satan ever lost his hair...

... there would be hell toupee.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BelgianRoo
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
If Satan ever lost his hair

There would be Hell toupee.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dohpaz42
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
🚨︎ report
If Satan ever lost his hair

There would be hell Toupee.

Edit: typo

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FirstMandalore
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
🚨︎ report
If Satan ever lost his hair

There would be hell toupee.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mama_Bear15
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
🚨︎ report
If Satan lost his hair

There would be hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Conviction666
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2020
🚨︎ report
When satan goes Bald

There will be hell toupΓ©e

πŸ‘︎ 185
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jamacianmesane
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
🚨︎ report
If satan goes bald...

There will be hell toupee.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/benwheely
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
If Satan ever lost his hair...

There would be a hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
🚨︎ report
If Satan goes bald....

There will be hell toupΓ©e

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mediumghetto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
If satan ever went bald

There would be hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Nightman_82
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report
When Satan goes bald

There will be hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BassWizard420
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
🚨︎ report
If satan ever loses his hair

There will be hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 107
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mattd2414
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2018
🚨︎ report
If Satan ever lost his hair, there would be hell toupee
πŸ‘︎ 324
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mflaherty7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2017
🚨︎ report

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