My girlfriend said she wanted a romantic getaway.

She's quite a specific bank robber.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/incredibleinkpen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 09 2021
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When you see a deaf couple holding hands, maybe it's not a romantic gesture...

Maybe, they just want each other to shut the fcuk up.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 29
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 01 2021
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Why are trees always incredibly romantic?

Because they're sappy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 41
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mwilkins1644
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2021
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Why do sea medusas make the worst romantic partners?

'cause they're always jelly!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hurtkopain
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2021
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Truly romantic
πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/fracturedhopexxx
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2021
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My wife asked me, β€œDo you hate all romantic comedies?”

I said, β€œNo. I love Love Actually actually.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2021
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A wife sent her husband a romantic text message…

She wrote: β€œIf you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you.”

Her husband texted back: β€œI’m on the toilet, please advise.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 138
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/aaronh1202
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 21 2020
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What singer would be the biggest advocator for romantic abstinence?

Lil Naw Sex

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JohnnyZillion
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 14 2020
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I read it's romantic to scatter rose petals on your bed, but they were too expensive. Instead, my wife and I will just have to make love on..

No bed of roses

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NoMoreTerritory
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 21 2020
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Last November 5, i was caught off guard when I was approached by a stranger angrily telling me to butt out of his romantic affairs.

As if i care who that Guy FΓ—Γ—Γ—Γ—s.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ganders81
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 06 2020
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You know what’s the most romantic food is?

The fat ones

They go straight to the heart

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RealYoloDude
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 15 2020
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What do you call a low-quality Russian composer, pianist, and conductor of the late Romantic period?

Knockmaninoff

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheLeakestWink
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 15 2020
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What do you call a romantic giraffe?

A neck-romancer

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/KillerRedPanda14
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 26 2019
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I asked the librarian if they had any books about romantic proposals.

She said yes.

(oc)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 81
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/maraudershake
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 19 2018
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Einstein and Freud once were having a conversation. Freud was talking about inner family romantic relationships.

...And Einstein said it was all relatives.

(Not from me, from Josh Fonokalafi)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DrunkenRedittor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2020
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Romantic flour arrangement
πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/amandajag
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 15 2019
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What car part is considered romantic in the French language?
πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Igrotzny
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 24 2019
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I know some of you might think you're hopeless romantics, but trust me, this says otherwise. [Spoiler]
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CJPsalm139
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 10 2019
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son: dad, what's the secret to you and mom being happy? dad:we go out to a romantic dinner at least once a week. son:that's wonderful where do you go? dad:I like italian...I don't know where your mother goes.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 46
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bhcicecream
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 04 2019
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What’s the most romantic chord?

A7

Because it slides right into the Dm’s

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PossiblyDumb66
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 15 2019
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They call me a hopeless romantic

Because I’ll never find love

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/runs_with_airplanes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 10 2019
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The girl at the copy store is mighty hot and is a new romantic interest. I introduced myself but forgot her name.

So I just call her prints-ess

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 08 2019
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Her: Did you just pretend to like romantic comedies when we were dating?

Me: Yes. I don’t love Love Actually actually.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 03 2019
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My wife says I'm a hopeless romantic

and a hopeless handyman, hopeless cook, hopeless husband.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2019
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One my friends is studying in New Zealand and her boyfriend is studying in Canada. I told this to someone and remarked on how romantic it would be for them to date on the International date line .
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hal_potter_seven
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 07 2019
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She: (In romantic mood) I love your eyes

Me: They came free with the head

πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ihasanali
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 22 2018
🚨︎ report
What was the most romantic fruit in the fruit section at the store?

The dates. *ba dum ching*

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CoolCora2018
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 10 2019
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A detective is staking out the entrance of a romantic restaurant..

...and after a few hours of not seeing the criminals he's looking for he gets hungry. He calls his partner to fill in for five minutes while he grabs some dinner and tells him to "take a picture of every single person that walks through the door." The partner waits for the detective to return and when he does the detective asks to see the photos that he took. The partner replies "I didn't see any single people, I saw a lot of couples though."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 38
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nmclamb
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2017
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Experiments show that olfactory perception of pheromones might play a role in romantic attraction...

Love is blind, but it has a great sense of smell.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 08 2019
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Gloves are so romantic,

They are always holding your hands

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sakkiez
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 09 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the most romantic kind of literary allusion?

A you-for-me-ism

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/snoozywaifu
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 29 2018
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What do you call a hopeless romantic who wanders the countryside?

Roam-eo.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RhynoCTR
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 22 2018
🚨︎ report
You know I can tell that the man who invented qwerty keyboards is a romantic?

He put U and I together

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Wherearemylegs
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2017
🚨︎ report
Romantic interest at work left these for me to find aftee my shift...I think she's a keeper

https://imgur.com/a/JBPDX

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cquehe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 20 2016
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I'm talking to a potential romantic partner, when she pulls out these doozies...

What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bale.

Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.

How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the Fresh Prince.

I'm not sure, but something tells me she's a keeper, guys.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gotdamngotaboldck
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 19 2014
🚨︎ report
Why don't trees like romantic comedies?

Because they are too sappy!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HugoFuguzev
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 02 2016
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Never have a romantic relationship with a fellow employee

You two just won't work.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Auximoron
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 09 2015
🚨︎ report
A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband the following text...

β€œIf you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you!!!” The husband, being a non-romantic sort, replied... β€œI am on the toilet. Please advise.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 107
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I tell everyone that I hate all romantic comedies, but that is a lie.

I love Love Actually actually.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what are the most romantic foods?

The fat ones

They go straight to the heart

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RealYoloDude
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report

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