My girlfriend said she wanted a romantic getaway.

She's quite a specific bank robber.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/incredibleinkpen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2021
🚨︎ report
When you see a deaf couple holding hands, maybe it's not a romantic gesture...

Maybe, they just want each other to shut the fcuk up.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Why are trees always incredibly romantic?

Because they're sappy.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mwilkins1644
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do sea medusas make the worst romantic partners?

'cause they're always jelly!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hurtkopain
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Truly romantic
πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fracturedhopexxx
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me, β€œDo you hate all romantic comedies?”

I said, β€œNo. I love Love Actually actually.”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
A wife sent her husband a romantic text message…

She wrote: β€œIf you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you.”

Her husband texted back: β€œI’m on the toilet, please advise.”

πŸ‘︎ 138
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aaronh1202
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What singer would be the biggest advocator for romantic abstinence?

Lil Naw Sex

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JohnnyZillion
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I read it's romantic to scatter rose petals on your bed, but they were too expensive. Instead, my wife and I will just have to make love on..

No bed of roses

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoMoreTerritory
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Last November 5, i was caught off guard when I was approached by a stranger angrily telling me to butt out of his romantic affairs.

As if i care who that Guy FΓ—Γ—Γ—Γ—s.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ganders81
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what’s the most romantic food is?

The fat ones

They go straight to the heart

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RealYoloDude
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a low-quality Russian composer, pianist, and conductor of the late Romantic period?

Knockmaninoff

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheLeakestWink
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a romantic giraffe?

A neck-romancer

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KillerRedPanda14
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I asked the librarian if they had any books about romantic proposals.

She said yes.

(oc)

πŸ‘︎ 81
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πŸ‘€︎ u/maraudershake
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2018
🚨︎ report
Einstein and Freud once were having a conversation. Freud was talking about inner family romantic relationships.

...And Einstein said it was all relatives.

(Not from me, from Josh Fonokalafi)

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrunkenRedittor
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Romantic flour arrangement
πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/amandajag
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What car part is considered romantic in the French language?
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Igrotzny
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I know some of you might think you're hopeless romantics, but trust me, this says otherwise. [Spoiler]
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CJPsalm139
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2019
🚨︎ report
son: dad, what's the secret to you and mom being happy? dad:we go out to a romantic dinner at least once a week. son:that's wonderful where do you go? dad:I like italian...I don't know where your mother goes.
πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bhcicecream
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s the most romantic chord?

A7

Because it slides right into the Dm’s

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PossiblyDumb66
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
🚨︎ report
They call me a hopeless romantic

Because I’ll never find love

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2019
🚨︎ report
The girl at the copy store is mighty hot and is a new romantic interest. I introduced myself but forgot her name.

So I just call her prints-ess

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Her: Did you just pretend to like romantic comedies when we were dating?

Me: Yes. I don’t love Love Actually actually.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife says I'm a hopeless romantic

and a hopeless handyman, hopeless cook, hopeless husband.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
🚨︎ report
One my friends is studying in New Zealand and her boyfriend is studying in Canada. I told this to someone and remarked on how romantic it would be for them to date on the International date line .
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hal_potter_seven
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2019
🚨︎ report
She: (In romantic mood) I love your eyes

Me: They came free with the head

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ihasanali
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2018
🚨︎ report
What was the most romantic fruit in the fruit section at the store?

The dates. *ba dum ching*

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CoolCora2018
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2019
🚨︎ report
A detective is staking out the entrance of a romantic restaurant..

...and after a few hours of not seeing the criminals he's looking for he gets hungry. He calls his partner to fill in for five minutes while he grabs some dinner and tells him to "take a picture of every single person that walks through the door." The partner waits for the detective to return and when he does the detective asks to see the photos that he took. The partner replies "I didn't see any single people, I saw a lot of couples though."

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nmclamb
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2017
🚨︎ report
Experiments show that olfactory perception of pheromones might play a role in romantic attraction...

Love is blind, but it has a great sense of smell.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Gloves are so romantic,

They are always holding your hands

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sakkiez
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the most romantic kind of literary allusion?

A you-for-me-ism

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/snoozywaifu
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a hopeless romantic who wanders the countryside?

Roam-eo.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RhynoCTR
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2018
🚨︎ report
You know I can tell that the man who invented qwerty keyboards is a romantic?

He put U and I together

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wherearemylegs
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2017
🚨︎ report
Romantic interest at work left these for me to find aftee my shift...I think she's a keeper

https://imgur.com/a/JBPDX

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cquehe
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2016
🚨︎ report
I'm talking to a potential romantic partner, when she pulls out these doozies...

What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bale.

Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.

How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the Fresh Prince.

I'm not sure, but something tells me she's a keeper, guys.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gotdamngotaboldck
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2014
🚨︎ report
Why don't trees like romantic comedies?

Because they are too sappy!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoFuguzev
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2016
🚨︎ report
Never have a romantic relationship with a fellow employee

You two just won't work.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Auximoron
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2015
🚨︎ report
A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband the following text...

β€œIf you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you!!!” The husband, being a non-romantic sort, replied... β€œI am on the toilet. Please advise.”

πŸ‘︎ 107
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I tell everyone that I hate all romantic comedies, but that is a lie.

I love Love Actually actually.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what are the most romantic foods?

The fat ones

They go straight to the heart

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RealYoloDude
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report

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