Pomelo Anthony
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πŸ‘€︎ u/impressivebeef
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
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I ordered some ripe, juicy, golden yellow mangoes from a grocery store. But all the mangoes they sent me were green.

They gave me a raw deal.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/drawsouza
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
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My daughters favorite fruit is mango. So when she’s older and starts dating.

I’ll be sure to remind her to always let the Man-go.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ssj3dvp11
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2021
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Mango!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Donfatty
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
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What is a Tyrannosaurus rex's favorite drink?

A Tea Rex

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2021
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Man gone with a mango
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Is_This_L055
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
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If your Man doesn't like Mangos, you need to let that Mango
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LamePakistaniDude
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
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Did you hear about the guy who went on a fruit diet? In just 2 days, he became completely obnoxious

Evidently, it is enough to make a Mango crazy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Esmeralda_i
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
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MANgo
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sarmax04
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
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My dad and I bought a pomelo.

So my dad and I are trying a pomelo for the first time. He's cutting the peel off and it's quite thick. I ask:

"What's that kind of, fluffy white stuff on the inside of the peel called."

"It's called the pith." He responds

"Oh ok."

"Oh pith off!"

We stare at each other and just burst out laughing.

Good times.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Canadian_Ace
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2015
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Some well considered puns

From an email my cousin sent me:

I wanted to be a monk but I never got the chants.

I was kidnapped by mimes, they did unspeakable things to me.

The finest shoes are made of smooth leather, my opinion will never be suede.

A perfectionist walked into a bar - apparently it wasn't set high enough.

Man injured in bizarre peek-a-boo accident! He's in ICU.

Went to this horrible bar called "The Fiddle" ... it really was a vile inn.

To the thief who stole my glasses, I will find you - I have contacts.

If any of you knows how to fix hinges my door is always open.

Police car loses wheels to thief! Cops are working tirelessly to nab suspect.

Cold? Go stand in the corner, it's 90 degrees.

If your guy doesn't appreciate fresh fruit puns let that mango.

A few puns make me numb but math puns make me number.

My friend was explaining electricity and I was like "Watt"?

Someone threw a jar of mayo at me, I was like "What the hellman?"

Where did the Terminator find toilet paper? Aisle B, back.

Due to the quarantine I'll only be doing inside jokes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eli_Truax
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
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My neighbor said a man walked into my garden and stole my mangoes.

I am wondering where did that mango.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/strychinine
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
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What happens when humans and mangoes disagree ?

Man goes to war

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
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Why can't Ana go to the fruit store?

Because they ban Ana.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/notBjoern
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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How do you make a mango shake?

You take it to a scary movie.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BadPanda666
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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β€ͺI mashed a few mangoes, pineapples, melons, strawberries, and grapes into a 🍲. Served the mash to guests visiting my place.

Called the dish, Mea Pulpa. ‬

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πŸ‘€︎ u/golubeerji
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
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The plural of mango should be changed to mengo
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rtybanana
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2016
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Dog Joke: What do you call a Collie with a mango on it's back?

Mango Lassie

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RCRadioCarbon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
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I'm looking for the story of an astronaut whose lunar Odyssey was very fruitful?

Mangoes to the moon

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shouldExist
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
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A cold mango sheikh
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kauntest
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2018
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My wife told my four year old daughter that she couldn’t use her plastic IKEA knife to slice mangos.

I said β€œYeah kid, that’s just not going to cut it.”

My wife looked at me and said β€œYou think you’re pretty sharp, don’t you?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cranthony
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2018
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How far can a mango,

If he's got a license but doesn't avocado ?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/deelan1990
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2018
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My wife is going through a tropical food craze. There are fruits all over the house!

It's enough to make a mango crazy!

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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Singular: One mango

Plural: Two menwent

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Joe_Ferro_890823
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2018
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My brother was caught stealing fruit last night...

Didn't know I was related to a waterfelon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RROB2000
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
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Fruit on Fruit Violence.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rvagoonerjc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
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I don’t like mangoes. I asked my boyfriend if he thinks they’ll grow on me one day.

He said β€œI think they can. You just need to be watered properly.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/moonchild2998
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2018
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How did I make the mango tree fit in my flower-pot?

I planted it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hostileb
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2018
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What did the annoyed peach say to the mango?

Man-go away!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BormahTiid
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2018
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🚫
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_talha007
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2018
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The wife forgot a mango in the car.

She went to get it, came back with a peach from an earlier shopping trip. She asked me to come with her to look for this mango. As we looked around her car she asked, "Did I buy a mango?" I replied, "so there's a chance this search might prove fruitless?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dukeofgonzo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2016
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Man went
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ratzypiet
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2018
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My wife saw two mangos....

.....in the pear section and said that's not where they belong

I replied it's a pair of mangos and they belong exactly where they are.

The man next to us got a good chuckle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/reggiekush0426
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2015
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I Posted this yesterday in other sub
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RickyMemes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
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Ladies, if he can't appreciate your fruit jokes...

You need to let that mango.

πŸ‘︎ 16k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/__teju
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
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Ladies, if he doesn't appreciate your fruit jokes....

....you need to let that mango.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
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If your man doesn't appreciate jokes about fruit...

You need to let that mango...

😁

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JessieJade18
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
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Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes,

you need to let that mango...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThaCrimsonChinn
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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My wife is on a tropical fruit diet, the house is full of stuff

It is enough to make a mango crazy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes, you need...

... to let that mango.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Khyta
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
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Mangoes

But where?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gbhacker133
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2018
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My girlfriend started an all fruit diet yesterday, the house is FULL of the stuff.

ItsΒ enoughΒ toΒ makeΒ aΒ mangoΒ crazy!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/runew0lf
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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Ladies, if he can't appreciate your fruit jokes...

...you need to let that mango

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrNakamura
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2019
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Ladies, if he can't appreciate your fruit jokes...

...you need to let that mango.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SyncingShiip
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2020
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If he doesn't appreciate your fruit jokes

You need to let that mango

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πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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My wife started a tropical diet recently.

There's so much stuff in the house it would make a mango crazy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheNefelivata
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2020
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