Just reached the coast of Labrador, looking for signs of retrievers.

(what my dad texted me from the airplane home)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lucidDreamcast
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2020
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What do you call a Labrador Retriever trained to smell for meth?

A Meth Lab.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Radish00
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2019
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What was Schrodingerβ€˜s cat most afraid of?

A FermiLabrador Retriever.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthropocene
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
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My dog was getting a little fat

I brought my dog over to my dad's house. He said she was getting a little husky. I said "No Dad, she's a labrador retriever"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ArtVandelazy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2016
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A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doc, I'm not feeling well."

The doctor says, "Okay, well have a seat." He then walks out of the room for a moment and comes back with a Labrador Retriever. The dog sniffs him a bit, then the doctor walks him back out of the room with his tail wagging. A couple minutes pass, and the doctor comes back with a cat. He rubs the cat all over the man until it meows, then takes it back out of the room. The doctor then returns and says, "Well, you seem fine to me. That'll be $1000." The man, flabbergasted, yells, "$1000?! There wasn't even anything wrong with me!" The doctor replies, "Well it rounds out to that between the lab work and the cat scan..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JH456
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2015
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I dadjoked...my dad.

He took one of our 100 pound labrador retrievers to the vet and texted me to bring the other (less hassle). I pull up next to his car in the parking lot. Before I let my dog out of the back of my truck I turn to him and say "I normally do my dog deals at night. Less witnesses."

I'd like to say he sighed and drove off. Instead he asked what I was on about. I explained the joke to which he said, "I raised you better. You're supposed to say $10 a gram or 10k for the whole lab."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ck_mooman
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2015
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When visiting my grandpa in the hospital

I was visiting my grandpa in the hospital and he got a CT Scan and lab work done.

He said: " They ran me over with a Siamese cat and a labrador retriever. "

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kidgun
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2014
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Girlfriends dad thinks he's funny.

> A young boy and his father are walking down the street, when they see a golden retriever on top of a labrador, doing the dirty. The boy asks "Daddy, what are they doing!?" and his father calmly replies "Don't worry son, that's how they make a puppy."

> Later that evening, after the boy has gone to bed, Daddy and Mommy have their alone time. Just as things are getting hot and heavy, the young boy walks into the room and is shocked. "Daddy, what are you doing to Mommy?!" to which his father calmly replies "Don't worry Son, this is how we make a baby!" His son is dismayed, thinks for a second, and says: "Well turn her over, I want a puppy!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gethaased
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2013
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