#Commonwealth FleetMod 2047 ##Commonwealth Fleet Modernization Plan LANCE DO BOJU SZABLE W DŁOŃ
Minister of National Defence: Pyotr Maximov
> Polish Armaments Group: Brigadier General Artur Kołosowski
> PZL-Świdnik: Jacek Libucha
> WB Electronics: Piotr Wojciechowski
> Polish Remontowa Shipbuilding: Piotr Soyka
> Vladivostok Shipyard: Sapalyov Yaroslavovich
> Almaz-Antey: Novikov Yan Valentinovich
> United Aircraft Corporation: Denis Manturov
#Vladimir Chelomei-Class Fast Combat Support Ship
The Vladimir Chelomei-Class Fast Combat Support Ship will fill a void in the Commonwealth Navy that calls for high-speed support ships capable of replenishing Carrier Strike Groups. Capable of Carrying Dry Stores, Munitions, and Jet Fuel, among other necessities for a Combat Group. Constructed out of Graphene Reinforced Metal Matrix Composite, the class will be produced to a military standard. The Vladimir Chelomei-Class will replace Ex-American Replenishment Ships and augment Russian and Polish Sourced Oilers.
#Specifications:
- Displacement: 48,900 Full Load
- Length: 230m
- Beam: 35m
- Propulsion: 2 Globus 40MWe reactors; 2 superconducting motors, 80 MW total
- Speed: 33 Knots
- Range: Yes
- Endurance: 60+ Days
- Crew: 125
- Unit Cost: $240 Million
Armament
- Guns:
- 2x 25mm Typhoon Weapons System
- 4x WLKM 12.7mm Multi-Barrel HMG
- Laser:
- 1x 2MW FEL turret
- CIWS:
- 2x 3MJ railgun rapid fire CIWS + 12 Pantsir s4 missiles each
Sensors & Processing systems
- Multi-mode Graphene-Photonic+Quantum DAR system
- YSN connection
- Combat Control PIC/QPU Mainframe Assistant (focus on Missile Defence)
- Advanced Infrared Search & Track Navalized System
- Electro-Optic, Mine and Decoy Countermeasures
- ACMSA Conformal Sonar Array
Electronic Warefare Suite & Decoys
- Prosvet-MQ
- 8x PU KT-216 Decoy Launchers
- 2x PU KT-308 Decoy Launchers
Vehicles Carried
- Aviation:
- Up to 2, including:
- 1x [Ka-300K/Mi-300VK Naval Quinjets](h
Do your worst!
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
They’re on standbi
Pilot on me!!
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
I won't be doing that today!
You take away their little brooms
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
There hasn't been a post all year!
When I got home, they were still there.
It’s pronounced “Noel.”
After all his first name is No-vac
What, then, is Chinese rap?
Edit:
Notable mentions from the comments:
-
Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits
-
French/Finnish art
-
Country/Canadian rap
-
Chinese/Country/Canadian rock
-
Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap
There hasn't been a single post this year!
(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)
Bob
So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."
Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.
Just to clarify, 12345678
Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...
Notices there's only 2;
Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."
I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.
I was just sitting there doing nothing.
“BOOM”?!
"That's what they're fighting about."
Because his Visa didn’t work.
Because the audience only responds in a low ha
It really does, I swear!
A happy Uncle.....
"Beauty, because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder!"
