*tips hat at mosquito*

M’laria

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SerbianTarHeel
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2018
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Ladyfingers are the opposite of mentos

Dad hat tip to u/xcammanx

πŸ‘︎ 429
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lytical
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
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What do you call a pig with three eyes?

A piiig.

*Hat tip to my kids for this one...helping me be a better dad every day.

πŸ‘︎ 97
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kingfisher-Zero
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2019
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A man and his wife are walking down the street when they see Police Officer Ed up the street.

It's a small town so they know Police Officer Ed well enough to know that he can be pretty curt and rude. As they pass him, they exchange pleasantries. The husband tips his hat and Officer Ed does the same. The wife says, "Hello Officer Ed, it's a beautiful day isn't it?" Officer Ed looks at the sky, grunts, and says, "It looks like rain." The wife looks at the sky and says, "But there isn't a cloud in the sky." Officer Ed doubles down, "It's definitely going to rain."

The husband doesn't want to start any problems so he bids the officer good day, takes his wife's arm and leads her along. Once they were out of earshot, the husband said to his wife, "Listen, Rude Officer Ed knows rain, dear."

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/salawm
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2018
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