At the office barbecue, I grilled some rare steak for our boss, and he said, “I like it well done.”
I said, “Thanks. That means a lot.”
I recently switched from using mayonnaise to using butter for making grilled cheese sandwiches. My wife said she liked them more with the butter, but kindly asked me if it was more work this way?
I answered: "It is, but only margarinely more."
Note: this really happened.
At a garage sale yesterday I got a George Foreman grill and a Muhammed Ali DVD set...
It took me two hours to grill a chicken the other day…
And it still didn't tell my why it crossed the road…
"We're here to offer support, not to grill you," they said at my review meeting.
"Like a bra, not a braai"
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Based on true events. I had to stop myself from blurting that out.
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Thanks to u/rumbustiousben for reminding me that not everyone knows what a braai is - it's a barbecue in Afrikaans and commonly used as part of English by South Africans
I tried grilled Aloe Vera at a restaurant today.
I just finished grilling a steak.
It refuses to tell me who it’s working for.
My friend was going to barbecue baby backs but fell in the way to the grill...
I am grilling tonight. I don't know how these sausages will turn out...
but I am expecting the wurst.
My 6 year old daughter has lined up all of her dolls towards the outdoor grill...
Looks like she’s preparing some kind of Barbie queue...
What will a chinese grill use when a wok is too slow
What happens when chickens lay eggs at the top of a hill?
What do you call a monk who steals a grilled cheese sandwich right off the griddle?
Out of the frying pan and into the friar.
I told my wife that I don’t go by my real name while grilling
A bear walks into a restaurant and says, "I'd like a grilled.......... cheese"
The waiter responds: "what's with the big pause? "
Me to home Depot employee: I want to see your grills
Home Depot employee who happens to be Nelly who has fallen on hard times: you want to see my what?
While I was grilling, my son asked "can I get pickles on my burger, If it's not too much to ask?"
I had breakfast at The Mesa Grill and got food poisoning. My lawyer said that I had a good case, but I'm a man.
I just didn't wanna sue Flay.
What do you call a refrigerated grilled cheese?
Today I took all my daughter’s dolls and lined them up by the window facing our grill
I was just preparing a Barbie Queue
We should grill this message into people
Just finished cleaning my grill.
What’s the difference between a dad and a grill?
How do you call a Sea creature that only cares about himself?
Being made out of gold, in fact, this is not like the other grills
A horse walks into a bar and grill...
The bartender says, "hey."
The horse says, "neigh. But I'll take some Quick Oats for the road."
The asphalt in the corner says, "thanks."
My neighbor had a BBQ party, and some guest threw a grill at his face.
The attack made headlines.
So I asked my dad if he pre-cooked the grilled chicken.
He responded with, “It’s not walking away.”
While riding down the road today, a fish jumped out of a boat that was being towed, and smashed into the front of my car.
It wasn't all bad though, I love grilled fish.
I can't bearlieve it. Also notice that the place is called Bear Grills.
Invest in grills!
They're hot steakholders!
How do you call a lawyer's grill party?
What’s a unit for every bar and grill for one waiting line?
One day when I was young, I watched my father grill burgers.
When they were done he handed me one telling me it was a bison burger. He then left and never came back.
Was out in the backyard grilling some burgers for my daughter and her friends but they'd lined up a bunch of dolls to get food too
Did you hear about the guy that couldn’t start his grill, so he added kerosene?
Still didn’t work. His doctor had him on anti-inflammatories.
I was grilling pizza for dinner tonight...
I was explaining the steps and process to my daughter.
I asked her, "do you know what you call the important and precious moments just before you burn the crust?"
She shook her head no.
"....Crunch time...."
A dad Manning the grill at a backyard bbq. Son approaches...
Son: "Dad? Can you make me a burger?"
Dad: "Sure! (waives tongs like a magic wand) POOF! You're a burger!"
(Dad laughing hysterically. Son rolls eyes)
I keep a spare grilled tortilla with cheese sandwich in my fridge.
It's a just-in-quesadilla.
Couldn’t figure out when sunrise was supposed to be this morning
Luckily it finally dawned on me.
🤦🏻♂️
Got a big 12 pound brisket on the grill today, and several more dad jokes in the chamber.
Doin dad stuff.
My wife wouldn't stop nagging me about not helping cook the chicken on the grill
So I angrily got up and flipped the bird
At the office barbecue, I grilled a medium rare steak and my boss said, “I like it well done!”
I said, “Thanks. That means a lot to me.”
A grizzly bear walks into a restaurant and says “Can I get a grilled..............cheese?”
The waiter replies “Why the big pawse?”
...
“Because I’m a bear”
It took me two hours to grill a chicken the other day…
And it still didn't tell my why it crossed the road…
For sale: George Foreman grill and a Muhammad Ali dvd.
My 6 year old daughter has lined up all of her dolls towards the outdoor grill.
Looks like she is preparing some kind of barbie queue.
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