My wife and I are finally fulfilling my lifelong dream of visiting The Golden Gate in person.

She said, β€œWhat would you do when you finally see it?”

I said, β€œI’ll cross the bridge when I get there.”

πŸ‘︎ 107
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Next month, I’m going to fulfill my lifelong dream of seeing The Golden Gate in San Francisco in person.

My wife said, β€œWhat are you going to do when you finally see it?”

Me: I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.

πŸ‘︎ 428
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
[Dad Joke courtesy of Stephen King] The big moron and the little moron were standing on the Golden Gate bridge. The big moron fell off. Why didn't the little moron fall off too?

Because the little moron was a little more on.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MysteryOrange7
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
The Golden Gate Bridge's new slogan.

The jump of a lifetime.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dunn_with_this
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Have you heard the don't need the golden gate bridge any longer?

Because it's already long enough

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/motoman2550
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2017
🚨︎ report
It costs around $7 to cross the Golden Gate Bridge, regardless of whether you're a commuter or a tourist.

It takes a toll on everybody.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/original_evanator
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2016
🚨︎ report
The story of my friend Sam

HI I’m Tim the turtle, yes a real turtle. And I would like to tell you the story of my best friend. I once had a friend by the name of Sam. Sam of course was a clam. A real live honest to goodness clam. He was my best buddy, but unfortunately he smoked and drank and ran around with loose women (and a few men). I was more of the goodie two shoes type. I never drank, never smoked, I didn’t even swear. But for some reason Sam and I were the best of friends. I guess you can say we were the epitome of opposites attracting. One day as we were hanging out walking along the beach Sam, after his fifth cigarette in a row, had a heart attack and died. I was heart broken. My best friend died right there in front of me and he never repented his evil ways. I was sure he would spend eternity in damnation. Sigh. Being the goodie two shoes type I was still extremely healthy well into my old age. I missed my friend terribly for many years. On his birthday I would host a party and invite his old stripper girlfriends and poker buddies around to relive stories. It was always a fun evening, but in the end left me more lonely than before. Eventually, my broken heart couldn’t stand it anymore and I too died. I was pleased to find that there was a heaven. Being an almost saint I was whisked directly past the line to the Pearly Gates to be greeted by St. Peter. A big grin erupted on his face and he came right around his desk to give me a great big hug. β€œTim”, he said, β€œYou have been such a good person back on earth that God has asked me to grant you any wish you would like before even entering heaven”. To say I was flabbergasted is an understatement. I thought for a minute, I guess God expected me to ask for more time on earth, but I knew what I really wanted to do was to visit with my old friend Sam. So I asked. Poor St. Peter didn’t know what to say. You know Sam is in Hell right? Well I knew that was a strong possibility so I wasn’t surprised. Peter excused himself for a while and went to check with the big guy himself. He was gone quite some time, but eventually he returned. Peter said my request was approved, but under a few conditions. First, I would have to carry a golden harp as a passport back into heaven. This harp could only be carried by a good soul so I couldn’t be replaced by a look alike demon. Second, I would have to return by midnight. God didn’t want me to face too much temptation. I agreed to these conditions and took the highway down to hell. (Nope n

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dendari
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Dad made a joke in San Francisco.

We had finished walking the Golden Gate Bridge and were in our car. I took off my shoes and noticed that my socks had holes in them.

"I didn't know you had religious socks," he said to me.

"What?" I replied.

"You know, because they're holy."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Kalawishis
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2016
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken...?

Why did the chicken refuse to cross the Golden Gate Bridge?

He found it to suspenseful.

I randomly made this one up to bug my son. Told it to him in front of several of his friends. The got it. But they didn't like it. I still find it funny.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bthar
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2015
🚨︎ report
My wife and I are planning a trip to San Francisco to finally fulfill my lifelong dream of seeing The Golden Gate in person.

She asked me, β€œWhat are you going to do when you see it?”

I said, β€œLet’s cross that bridge when we get there.”

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2018
🚨︎ report
I’m so excited that my wife and I are finally visiting San Francisco to see the Golden Gate in person.

She asked me, β€œWhat are you going to do when we see it?”

Me: We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.

πŸ‘︎ 406
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife and I are going on a trip to San Francisco to fulfill my lifelong dream of seeing the Golden Gate in person.

She said, β€œ What are you going to do when you finally see it?”

I said, β€œLet’s cross that bridge when we get there.”

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife and I are finally visiting San Francisco to fulfill my lifelong dream of seeing the Golden Gate in person.

Her: What would you do when we see it?

Me: Let’s cross that bridge when we get there.

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife and I are finally going to visit San Francisco to see the Golden Gate in person.

Her: What are you going to do when we see it?

Me: We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2018
🚨︎ report
So incredible

So the wife and me were excited to see the golden gate in person. So the wife asks me, "what are we gonna do when we get there?" And I replied, "we'll cross that bridge when we get there"

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/I_AM_AWP
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report

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