I went to see Formula E racing the other day...

The atmosphere was electric!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Homer_Simpson2
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 27 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do baby mathematicians drink?

Formula

๐Ÿ‘︎ 90
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Gashau
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A chemistry joke

Never mind. It was too formulaic.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/__Macaroon__
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Herbal essentials

Noted researcher Rosemary Fuller was involved in a lab accident today. She's working on the theory that herb-based formulas can actually reverse or accelerate the aging process. Parsley, for example, has been shown to cause rapid aging, and recent efforts have shown good results with oregano-based anti-aging serums. Ms Fuller was, unfortunately, standing near a vat of simmering oregano serum when a nearby researcher nudged her and she fell in! It appeared at first that the anti-aging serum would cause her to de-age down to nothing. Now, though, it looks like she'll be all right. The Parsley's aged Rosemary in time.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/berenaltorin
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Teacher asked โ€œWhat is the formula of water?โ€ Student said โ€œH I J K L M N Oโ€ teacher said โ€œthatโ€™s not the formula of waterโ€

Student said โ€œyou said the formula was H to Oโ€.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 271
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/sarcasticpremed
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
You know youโ€™ve made a terrible joke when you make the math teacher completely lose it.

Teacher: โ€œIf acceleration is constant, we get all these really nice formulas. If acceleration is not constant, the math gets messy.โ€

Me: โ€œYou might say that for ruining the math, itโ€™s being a jerk.โ€

๐Ÿ‘︎ 36
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Bobby-Bobson
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I hate all races

Especially the formula 1's

๐Ÿ‘︎ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/_Epicasian_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do baby parabolas drink?

Quadratic Formula!

Maybe this is more of a mom joke...

Edit: this isnโ€™t my joke. I thought this sub might enjoy it though

๐Ÿ‘︎ 68
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/lemontolole
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What is the formula for making friends?

Squadratic formula

๐Ÿ‘︎ 23
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/paoerfuuul
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 01 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I ain't racist. In fact I like all kinds of races

Nascar, motocross, formula one, and drag racing.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Jan_Tik
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 15 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do parents give their baby if they want them to become a future race car driver?

Formula one.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Pun-isher42
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 03 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Dad maths

a^(2) +b^(2) =E/m

I know it's hard to get, but my husband won't let it go. He is starting making dad jokes using formulas, please send help. ๐Ÿ˜‚

๐Ÿ‘︎ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/partitadoppia
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
If the formula for water is H20...

Then is the formula for ice H20 cubed?

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Impulse-impulse
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Nihilist Dad Jokes

Why did the scarecrow win a prize? Because he stood alone in his field! He stood there for years, rotting, until he was forgotten.

I tell my kids, youโ€™re allowed to watch the TV all you wantโ€ฆ Just donโ€™t turn it on! This way they will begin to understand the futility of all things.

How does a penguin build a house? Igloos it together. Like all animals, it is an automaton, driven by blind genetic imperative, marching slowly to oblivion.

Why donโ€™t skeletons go trick or treating? They have no body to go with them! The skeletons are like us: alone, empty, dead already.

I donโ€™t really like playing soccer. I just do it for kicks! Like all of humanity, I pretend to enjoy things, and others pretend to care about my charade.

You hear about the moon restaurant? Good food, no atmosphere! If you eat there, you forfeit your life, which would make no difference to the universe as a whole.

Why did the blonde focus on an orange juice container? It said concentrate! She realized that societyโ€™s depictions of her were like the juice: formulaic, insipid, fake.

My wife told me to put the cat out. I didnโ€™t know it was on fire! By the time I could act, it was incinerated, a harbinger of the path we all must take.

How come the invisible man wasnโ€™t offered a job? They just couldnโ€™t see him doing it! This man stands for all of us: unseen, misunderstood, irrelevant.

Today I gave away my old batteriesโ€ฆ Free of charge! No one wanted them, so I became angry and threw them in the yard. The battery acid now leaks into the soil, killing a colony of ants. A sparrow eats their bodies and is poisoned. Somewhere in the Serengeti, a lion devours his rivalโ€™s cubs. Then the lion is shot by a poacher and sold to an unloved rich man whose father was an unloved rich man. In five billion years, the Sun will become a bloated giant, boiling the oceans and consuming our pointless cruelties with flames. I wake sweat-drenched and screaming, staring at the visage of a faceless god. โ€œWHAT HAVE I DONE?! HOW COULD I BRING A CHILD INTO THIS WORLD!?โ€ But this god, like all gods, is nothingโ€”just my sonโ€™s Wilson baseball mitt, sitting on my dresser, mocking me.

Will February March? No, but April May! Soon we become ash, and time forgets us.

Source: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/nihilist-dad-jokes

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/vorschlaghammer
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 03 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
BEE PUNS

Hey guys, I am working on a video project for AP Calc and am doing the bee move, but everytime they say bee a formula is introduced, then the next time an example. We are writing the formulas on yellow paper and writing in black sharpies because black amd yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow, ahh yellow and black. Anyqay, I need space fillers on the sheets of paper, so bee puns! I need a bunch, so do your thing!

We are also dressing up in bee costumes to take pictures of the formulas amd photoshopping our teachers face onto Barry Bee Benson

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jmm8398
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 13 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Chemistry Puns

Funny collection of chemistry puns

What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver? SWAG


Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? Heโ€™s 0K now.


What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.


How do Sulfur and Oxygen communicate? A sulfone


What do you call Iron blowing in the wind? Febreeze.


Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium the healing elements? Because if you canโ€™t helium or curium, you barium!


Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends argon.


Why did the acid go to the gym? To become a buffer solution!


Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!


Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak? Because itโ€™s in the ground state.


How many moles are in a guacamole? Avocadoโ€™s number.


If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.


What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.


Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.


What element is a girlโ€™s future best friend? Carbon.


I had to make these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.


Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na


Why can you never trust atoms? They make up everything!


Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? Heโ€™s 0K now.


What do you do with a dead chemists? Barium


What animal is made up of calcium, nickel and neon? A CaNiNe


What did the chemist snack on during lunch? A โ€˜gramโ€™ cracker.


What would you call a clown in jail? Silicon (Silly Con)


What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel and iron? A KNiFe.


How did carbon propose to Hydrogen? With a โ€œcarbonkneelโ€


What did one titration tell the other? Letโ€™s meet at the endpoint.


How can you spot a chemist in the restroom? They wash their hands before they go.


Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.


Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na


Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia? Because itโ€™s basic material.


Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just could not put it down


Why do chemistry professor like to

... keep reading on reddit โžก

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Punsville
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 30 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
[META] A plea for real dad jokes.

EDIT: I somehow JUST saw the Mod Sticky post from last week, where a lot of users have expressed similar sentiments to these. I apologize to the mods if this is not appropriate and respect your decision if you want to delete it. I just wanted to see if people were thinking the same kind of thing. Still, read it if ya like.

It used to be that /r/dadjokes was a place to post actual stories of real dad humor. 'My dad pulled out this groaner at dinner.' 'Just became a dad...I think I get it now!' These are the things that warm my heart and tickle my corny bone. And I don't think I'm alone.

Now, we're arrogant enough to think we know the formula for dad humor, so we can post anything reminiscent of it, and it counts as a dad joke. It's as if we think we own dad humor now, and we can bend it and shape it at will.

Let me tell you, folks. WE DO NOT OWN DAD HUMOR.

Even the dads among us don't own it. I think the universe just channels it through them in brilliant, glorious, involuntary sneezes. Some are more deft than others, and are seen by the universe as more worthy outlets. But they do not own it.

We can get close to elusive heart of dad humor, we can approach it, we can dance around it...but we can never touch it. This is where I take issue with posts like this one, which currently has over 4000 upvotes and 2000 net karma. Is it reminiscent of dad-like punly-ness? Would a dad chortle heartily at reading it? Yes, almost certainly yes. But does that make it a dad joke? No...I would argue not.

Dad jokes are also not just about the jokes themselves. They're about the response--that he manages to be surprised at his own genius, even on the eightieth repetition. They're about the face-palms and straight stares of family members. What is a dad joke without context?

My proposed solution: ban link/image posts. I wish it wouldn't have to come to that, but I can't see another way to get back on track to the real goal here. I have hover zoom--I understand the desire for instant gratification. I've skipped over interesting looking videos because they required a click.

But that's not why I come here.

I understand that there are legitimate dad jokes transmitted via text, or perhaps requiring a bit of visual context. At this point, though, I think they are a necessary sacrifice for a righteous cause. They can always be transcribed into text, or included in a self-post. Maybe it seems a bit extreme, especially in the face

... keep reading on reddit โžก

๐Ÿ‘︎ 27
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SlapYourHands
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 25 2013
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I'm going to teach my baby advanced mathematics

So it can derive it's own formula

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Twigsnapper
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2016
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
You know what I hate?

How Formula 1 aficionados despise anyone who mispronounce the name for the series of races that they have. They are such Prix about it.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 18
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/fart2125
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 16 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Got my students today

I'm explaining problem solving to my HS freshmen physical science class and I get to the part about the formula, which I call a "relationship". I say that I, personally, am in a long term relationship with my ex-girlfriend. "I thought you were married" a bunch shout out. I am, my wife used to be my girlfriend.

Groans ensued, but the best part was one young lady shaking her head saying "I hate you so much Mr. RichardCranium_"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/RichardCranium_
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 11 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Calculating joke...

My kid was talking about Al Gore and I asked him if he knew that there was a mathematical formula that would predict how Mr Gore would perform to music. When he said no I asked him if he knew what an algorithm was...

๐Ÿ‘︎ 23
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Ratmotored57
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 03 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Rebellious Chem student

A rebellious Chemistry student was asked to give the formula for Nitrogen Monoxide, NO he yelled as he stormed out of the room.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/GenericWorkAccount1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 12 2014
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Even my calculus instructor has dad humor.

Today in Calc. class, we were going over a word problem, when the need for the area of a circle formula came up. My teacher asked us, "So, what's the formula?" to which we replied, "Pi r squared." She then remarked, "I think pies are rounded"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Vicepresidentjp
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 10 2013
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My math professor got us the other day.

Professor: "What is the formula for the area of a circle?"

Student: "pi r squared."

Professor: " No, pi are round. Cornbread is square."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheWhiteWhale64
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 07 2015
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do baby mathematicians drink?

Formula

๐Ÿ‘︎ 30
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Rxchel28
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What does a baby parabola drink?

Quadratic formula.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 13
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JDogg323
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do baby parabolas drink?

Quadratic Formula!

๐Ÿ‘︎ 29
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/cale-k
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do parents give their baby if they want them to become a future race car driver?

Formula one.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 43
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Pun-isher42
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 03 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did Einstein drink as a baby?

Formula.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 62
๐Ÿ’ฌ︎
๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/perezgc
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 08 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.