Dracula Pun by Frenums
πŸ‘οΈŽ 743
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/missdrywit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 08 2017
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My friend and I are working on a tight deadline in our Dracula action figure business.

I have to make every second Count.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 107
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 15 2021
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Mrs. Dracula, from the living room: "Count Dracula!"

Count Dracula, from the basement:"1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6..."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Phripheoniks
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 07 2021
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What type of car does Vlad Dracula drive?

A Chevy Impaler.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ezra611
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 20 2021
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Why isn't Dracula allowed out during COVID?

He's always coffin

πŸ‘οΈŽ 47
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dazeyderp
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 15 2021
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Dracula might have COVID.

He’s been coffin in his sleep.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 63
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/arc-ion
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2021
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Why did Dracula take cold medicine?

To stop his coffin.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 05 2021
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How does Dracula write his novels?

He blood types.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/iMakeCrap
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 27 2021
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Why did Dracula go to the library?

He wanted to sink his teeth into a good book.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/90eight
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 11 2021
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On what type of plate does Dracula get his blood soup served on?

On a plate-let

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Deadly_R
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 06 2021
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A conversation with Dracula

me: i’m going to make one of those diagrams that uses circles

dracula: venn

me: probably tomorrow

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/notmypornaccount9
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 25 2020
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I have killed so many vampires, but Dracula is proving hard fo catch

Finding where he is will enable the final count down

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/substantiallypartial
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 04 2020
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I've just got a job making plastic Draculas

But there are only two of us on the production line.

So I have to make every second Count!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 426
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Stoatwobbler
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 21 2020
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Elsa and Dracula had a child.

They named him Frostbite.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/skycooper11
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 18 2020
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Why can’t Superman beat Dracula?

Because he can’t go to the Krypt Tonight.

(I’ll see myself out)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 131
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 10 2020
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How did they know Dracula had covid-19?

Because of his Coffin.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 29
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mike561991
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 03 2020
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Why is Dracula so great with women?

Because he is a necromancer

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MartianHunter420
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2020
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The reason Superman can't defeat Dracula...

is because he can't go near the crypt tonight.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 97
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mex5150
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 10 2020
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What does a stoner Dracula say?

I vunt to smoke your bud

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ShadeTreeMechanix
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2020
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I got a job at a factory that makes Dracula toys

Its only me and one other worker. I need to make every second Count

πŸ‘οΈŽ 138
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/chefrobbo65
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 29 2020
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Count Dracula is a terrible project manager...

... He always avoid the stakeholders.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/trickertreater
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 19 2020
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We all know that Dracula is the #1 vampire and from Transylvania. But where is the #2 vampire from?

Pencil-vania.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dublers
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 16 2020
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Why doesn’t Dracula have friends?

Because he’s a pain in the neck

πŸ‘οΈŽ 37
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/asguardia
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 09 2020
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If Dracula passed gas

It would be a Nosferatoot.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AlmightyMoira
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 23 2020
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Unfortunately, Superman won’t be able to fight Dracula this evening...

He won’t go near the crypt tonight.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 196
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 28 2020
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What’s Dracula’s favourite type of coffee?

Decoffinated.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 46
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/engineerwho_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 19 2020
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There are relatively few films with Dracula in them. On the other hand, films without Dracula...

...are countless.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 68
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JellyRollGeorge
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 03 2020
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Why did Dracula lie in the wrong coffin?

He made a grave mistake.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 607
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 29 2019
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Why was Dracula bad at business?

He couldn't face his stakeholders?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 25 2020
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I saw a reddit post about someone having too many Dracula figurines

I knew my brother had the same problem, but the reddit account wasn't his. I told him about it and he said it was his post, so I asked "Throw away account?" He said "Yeah, good idea, I didn't think about that"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NO3-
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2020
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What was the name of that one promiscuous muppet that looked like Dracula?

You don’t know? Well, it’s the thot that counts.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SylveonFrusciante
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 08 2020
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Dracula has been visiting many doctors.

Yet none of them can fix his coffin.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2020
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What happens when you cross a snowman and Dracula?

You get frostbite!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Itsame_Daario
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 26 2019
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What is Dracula's least favorite fast food joint?

Stake N' Shake!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 21 2020
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What's Dracula's favourite streaming service?

Neckflix

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MadcapRecap
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 26 2020
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How do you know when Dracula catches Coronavirus? /r/Jokes/comments/flzxg8/…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mykeuk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 20 2020
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Who is a Yeti's favorite Dracula actor?

Christobrr Lee

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Gabbafather
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 02 2019
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Most people think the name Dracula cough comes from the way dracula would hold his Cape in front of his face

In reality it's because he is an expert in coffin

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dubeykeebler
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 11 2020
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Dracula told me to bow in his presence, you could say I was...

Down for the count

πŸ‘οΈŽ 76
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GrayAspen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 09 2019
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What did baby Dracula say to his mommy?

I vant to suck your titties

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RayMar123
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 07 2019
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My brother and I are working on a tight deadline in making Dracula action figures.

I have to make every second Count.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 41
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 15 2021
🚨︎ report
My brother and I are on a tight deadline to make Dracula action figures.

I have to make every second Count.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 27 2020
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My brother and I are on a tight deadline to make a bunch of Dracula action figures.

I have to make every second Count.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 431
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 30 2020
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My brother and I make Dracula action figures for a living, and we are on a really tight deadline.

I have to make every second Count.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 18 2020
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My brother and I are on a tight deadline to make Dracula action figures.

I have to make every second Count.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 19 2020
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Why is no one friends with Dracula?

Because he's a pain in the neck.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 56
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2019
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Why is no one friends with Dracula?

Because he's a pain in the neck.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 32
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 11 2019
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