I once defeated our local chess champion in less than three moves.
My karate lessons finally paid off.
π︎ 491
π
︎ Oct 14 2022
The turtle won the race. But the hare refused defeat.
It was a receding hare lying.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 13 2022
Why did Superman fail to defeat Dracula?
He could not go to the Crypt Tonight.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Oct 24 2022
My 8 yr old needed help on his spelling homework so he asked me how to use deduct, defense, and defeat in "a" sentence?
So I says to him: De head of deduct went over defense before defeat. π¦
π︎ 5
π
︎ Aug 01 2022
Iβm not sure the best sub to put this on but I just have to brag on myself. I just defeated the local chess champion in less than five moves!!!
Finally, my high school karate lessons paid off.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Aug 05 2022
Treeson
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Sep 28 2022
A teacher asked the class to write a sentence with defence, defeat, detail. Little Johnny wrote:
when a horse jumps over defence, defeat go first and then detail
π︎ 25
π
︎ May 25 2022
How did the two binomials defeat the trinomial?
π︎ 15
π
︎ Apr 17 2022
How to defeat the algorithm
π︎ 18
π
︎ Jan 28 2022
My teacher asked me to use the words deduct, detail, defeat, and defense in a sentence.
I said "Defeat of deduct go over defense before detail."
π︎ 765
π
︎ Aug 25 2021
A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated." And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers, "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun and their wings seeming like flames?"
"Yes, my master, I have."
"And a waterfall, spilling mightly over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?"
"Yes, my master, I have witnessed it."
"And the moon, when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?"
"Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvelous phenomenon."
"That is the problem. You keep watching all this shit instead of training."
π︎ 12k
π
︎ Jan 10 2021
How do non-binary samurai defeat their opponents?
π︎ 26
π
︎ Mar 13 2022
why was the man who lost his legs below the knee so tired all the time?
π︎ 23
π
︎ Oct 02 2022
Crassus was defeated during the campaign for Parthia.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Nov 27 2021
How did Batman defeat Mr Freeze?
π︎ 9
π
︎ Feb 18 2022
2, 4 and 6 tried to defeat 3, 5 and 7
But the odds were against them
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Dec 16 2019
Why did the guy with a foot fetish hate winning?
π︎ 83
π
︎ Aug 09 2022
I went to the library and asked for the self help section
They said if they told me it would defeat the purpose.
π︎ 291
π
︎ Jul 18 2022
A teacher requests the class to use"dandelion " in a sentence....
To which a little Jamaican kid stands up and his response is"Da elephant is more fierce Dandelion"π€£
π︎ 12
π
︎ Mar 08 2022
What's the opposite of winning with your hands?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Oct 21 2022
My "Agony of Defeat" Joke
True story. I'm in the living room and I hear my kid getting frustrated in the back room. When I go check out the problem, one of her dolls is stuck and she can't get it out of the closet. I go to help her out and notice that the dolls feet are stuck in the toy shopping cart she has. I pull the doll out and say:
"It appears you are suffering from the agony... of the feet"
My kid stares at me blankly for a few seconds and says, "I know that's a joke. I don't get it, but good job Dad."
π︎ 16
π
︎ Oct 23 2021
What body part always loses?
π︎ 509
π
︎ Oct 23 2021
The only thing that can defeat me...
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Aug 31 2019
The reason Superman canβt defeat Dracula...
is because he canβt go near the crypt tonight.
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jul 29 2021
Why did the The Rock file for divorce?
He was tired of being taken for granite.
π︎ 17
π
︎ Jul 15 2022
Defeating Predators With Facts & Logic
π︎ 19
π
︎ Nov 18 2020
What part of the body always looses?
Defeat
Edit: loses (damn mobile app)
π︎ 22
π
︎ Jun 22 2022
I have never been defeated...
I still have both of my feet
π︎ 42
π
︎ Dec 29 2020
Snoopy AKA Snoop dogg AKA the Red Baron has been spotted flying his Dogg house today. It is understood that he defeated his enemies in one fell snoop.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 04 2020
How to defeat Agent P in a swordfight.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Feb 10 2020
I had a crazy dream last night that I was being chased around the house by a group of mufflers!
.... I woke up exhausted.
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 20 2022
No joke here. I just want to tell any dads out there that may be struggling to keep your heads up...
When you look down, all you see is defeat.
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Oct 02 2021
We were utterly defeated by 2020
Because next year is 2020 won.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 01 2021
Whatβs the opposite of defeat?
π︎ 18
π
︎ Nov 19 2020
What happens when one duck defeats another duck?
π︎ 16
π
︎ Nov 14 2020
Credit to u/the_richard_cranium. In a sub called r/nononono where things that had the potential to go wrong do, a woman struggles to put out a match. She sets it on the table, defeated failing to do so, but she forgot to put it out before doing so.
Confused, another redditor asked βWhat kind of match was that?β Cranium replied βNo match for her apparentlyβ
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 18 2021
How did the autobots defeat the deceptions?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Oct 08 2020
Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.
Finally, my high school karate lessons paid off
π︎ 133
π
︎ Nov 14 2021
My teacher asked me to make a sentence using the words; defence, defeat and detail, i said....
When a horse jumps over defence, defeat go first then detail...
π︎ 38
π
︎ Jan 26 2022
Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than 5 moves.
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
π︎ 552
π
︎ Jul 29 2020
My teacher asked me to make a sentence with the word defence, defeat and detail
When a horse jumps over defence defeat go first the detail
π︎ 7
π
︎ Mar 23 2021
Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.
Finally, my high school karate lessons paid off.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 20 2021
The reason Superman can't defeat Dracula...
is because he can't go near the crypt tonight.
π︎ 99
π
︎ Sep 10 2020
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