Cockney Puns

A list of puns related to "Cockney"

Did you hear about the cockney who opened a spring water company?

He was a diamond geyser.

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👤︎ u/sergioarmagh
📅︎ Jan 20 2020
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How do you call a cockney garlic mayonnaise?

An oi-oli.

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👤︎ u/MiKeseMiCasa
📅︎ Oct 28 2019
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I walked up to a cockney family and stole the guy's wallet

"That's Our mahnee!" He said, as I ran off.

Once a safe distance away, I looked at the wallet and shouted back, "It's actually Armani."

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Nov 28 2018
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What do you call a genuine cockney alligator?

A propagator.

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👤︎ u/sandysingssongs
📅︎ Jun 07 2018
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What did the driver with the cockney accent tell the one armed, three headed hitchhiker?

'Allo, 'allo, 'allo! You seem 'armless enough. 'Op in!

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👤︎ u/cheersfolks
📅︎ Feb 12 2018
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So my dad uses this drug called Allosig...

Every time he pulls it out of the medicine cabinet, the family hears a great big 'ALLO SIG' from Dad, as if he were a cockney brit saying hi to someone named Sig.

Every bloody time. Same thing happens if any of us need aloe vera.

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👤︎ u/coz707
📅︎ Dec 05 2013
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