*This is a literal Dad Joke my father used to tell when I was a kid about 30 years ago. He's almost 80 now and it still makes him laugh.* - So, there was this man named James Fart. Everybody made fun of him since he was very young. "James Fart! James Fart" the bullies used to make him cry...

He came of age among this suffering and at 21 was finally able to legally change his name. He arrived at the government office where he presented himself:

-I'm James Fart and I want to legally change my name!

Of course they laughed at him (everybody did) but eventually they all settled and came around to the situation.

-Ok, so... your current name is.. Β·chucklesΒ· James Fart... I'm sorry, I just...

-I know, everybody has been laughing at my name since as long as I can remember.

After a long and tedious process, everything is ready.

-Very well, sorry for the delays but you know how hard this protocols are. The good news: you are no longer "James Fart", what name do you want instead?

-Charles Fart.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ‘€︎ u/gone11gone11
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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If god is love, and love is blind

Ray Charles must be god

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ‘€︎ u/frederik_engberg
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
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What’s going to happen when Queen Elizabeth dies?

Charles becomes the King formerly known as Prince.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/throw63105
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2020
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Eggar Allan Poe - chicken names needed

My husband and I are trying to think of creative chicken names for our new chickens. I want to call them literary puns, and so far I have the following:

Ernest Henningway

Charles Chickens

Eggar Allan Poe

Jane Aust-Hen

Lay K Rowling

Any other great suggestions?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/katetonta
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
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How much does the average Charles weigh?

A charles-ton.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ‘€︎ u/BawkMcGraw
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2020
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A joke that takes a while to evolve

To celebrate the 200th birthday of Charles Darwin, the scientific community joined together for a party. As is common at such gatherings, the Biologists began to argue about what species was the most suited to its environment. Finally after much heated debate, a group of scientists pledged to spend the rest of the year exhaustively researching the Biological record to once and for all determine which creature was the ultimate example of adaptivity and proficiency ever to live.

Yesterday, the results were announced at the National Academy of Sciences. The creature identified as the most adaptive and proficient in Earth's history was a previously unknown animal from the Mesozoic era, a water dwelling insect that thrived for a hundred million years.

It was ... a FishAnt

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CapnFancyPants
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
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I recently discovered whimsical jazz.

My favorite musicians so far are Derpy Hancock, Charles Dingus, and Smiles Davis.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ‘€︎ u/gamefreq0
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2019
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This is just a list of 50 famous people but if they were birds.
  • George Washwington
  • Leonarcrow da Vinci
  • Eagle Allen Poe
  • Harry S. Toucan
  • Teddy Dodosevelt
  • Charles Duckens
  • Octavian Owlgustus
  • Flysaac Newton
  • Benchicken Franklin
  • Gullysses S. Grant
  • Vincent Van Goose
  • John Lhawk
  • Charlecrane
  • Pengthoven
  • Nikquaila Tesla
  • Jean-Jacques Roostsseau
  • Charles Darwren
  • Rheasus Christ
  • Broodha
  • King Loony XIV
  • Nenepoleon Bonaparte
  • Mahootma Gandhi
  • Winstint Churchill
  • Genghis Swan
  • Pladove
  • Aleggsander the Great
  • Paul the Apostail
  • Lark Twain
  • Dante Aliturkey
  • Michelangswallow
  • Cardinal Marx
  • Albatross Lincoln
  • Robin E. Lee
  • Adolf Swiftler
  • Alextanager Hamilton
  • Ibis Presley
  • Ronald Raven
  • Arnestotle
  • Emuhammad
  • Sir Francis Beakon
  • Tchaikovskylark
  • Christfowler Columbus
  • Finchard Nixon
  • Henry VIII
  • Albert Einstork
  • Thomas Jayfferson
  • William Shrikespeare
  • Woodcock Wilson
  • King Chorioles I of England
  • Johann Sebastian Flock

Edit: formatting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/captbodgers
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2014
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If Charles Dance was made of lead...

he'd be Charles Dense.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sinius
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2018
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Father-In-Law just laid this one on the wife and I

So my wife is working on Genealogy stuff, and was asking her dad about some of his family history. After telling a few stories about some of his other uncles, he comes to his uncle Charles. "I was named after him, you know..." he tells us.

We look at him more than a bit incredulously, as his name is Michael.

He smiles and says "What? I sure as hell wasn't named BEFORE him..."

πŸ‘︎ 127
πŸ‘€︎ u/ohnoesazombie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2013
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Need Help with a Dinosaur Pun!

Reddit, I need your help. I'm coming up with dinosaur name puns and I'm stuck on my own name!

Kara + Parasaurolophus = Karasaurolophus

Claire + Pterodactyl = Clairodactyl

Erin + Triceratops = Tricerinatops

John + Iguanadon = Iguanajohn

Charles + ??? = ???

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chizarlicious
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2014
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Science and Music

Did you know that scientists have proven that Ray Charles's music is more emotionally stimulating than Stevie Wonder's? They conducted a double-blind study.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bundleofschtick
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2014
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Talking about drills.

Brother: And that's the chuck, right?

Dad: Well yes, but I'm not that familiar with it, so I call it the Charles.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tericakes
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2014
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She should have seen it coming

Mother in law had a copy of Charles Dickens great expectations on the coffee table and i saw an opportunity i couldn't pass up.

I got my wife's attention and heaved a sigh.

Wife: "what's wrong? "

Me: pointing to the book "it was such a letdown"

Wife: "how so? "

Me: "well, when i first picked it up i had great expectations..."

Wife : groan/laugh "i should have seen that coming"

This wasn't the first dad joke I'd made today but one in a long line of them. i had also said this a few minutes previous to her best friend who caught the joke before i finished and did nothing but loudly sigh and groan. This is what first caught my wife's attention.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dokpsy
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2015
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Do you know the Dans?

Well, there's Charles Dan, Jan Dan, and the whole Dan family!

Uncle just got me with this one. My grandpa says that they're a real family and they live where my grandparents used to live. I had a good laugh. Figured y'all would like this one!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flames5123
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2015
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Dad at a minor league hockey game

Dad and I walk into minor hockey league stadium. He sees the Chuck-A-Puck booth, stops me and say "if we move up to the big leagues they'll change the name to Charles-A-Puck".

My brain couldn't decide if I should laugh or just roll my eyes so I did neither and just stared blankly. It did not phase him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_mastubatorium
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2015
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A good quality for all restaurants to have.

Heard this in one of my GA Tech OMS CS lectures. (Michael isn't my Dad, but he is definitely a Dad.) The professors were discussing criteria for determining whether or not to enter a restaurant.

Michael: How about whether it smells good?
Charles: Yea I like cleanliness. Or you know what, let's be nice to our eateries. Let's say atmosphere.
Michael: Mmm, right, because if there's no atmosphere, it's going to be really hard to breath.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ‘€︎ u/merckens
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2014
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