What does a presidential candidate who cant get his votes up suffer from?
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Nov 04 2020
Mfw I cant think of a title :0
π︎ 321
π
︎ Nov 25 2020
Help I cantβ get inside my house, I lost my keys
π︎ 41
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
I cant see why I am posting this, no one else will see this post
π︎ 204
π
︎ Oct 18 2020
Why cant bri'ish people pronounce t?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 01 2020
What do you call a monkey that cant get into his house?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 26 2020
if Juan cant, i dont know who Pablo-bly can
π︎ 35
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
Cant weigh to see their face
π︎ 7k
π
︎ Apr 21 2020
Ive checked and checked and i just cant work out why my calculator has stopped working!!!
It just doesnβt add up.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Nov 16 2020
You cant download the film 'The Cold'
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 05 2020
What do u call a melon that cant marry?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 15 2020
Patient in hospital bed shouts to the doctor. Doctor Doctor I cant feel my legs!
I know that the doctor said; We have amputated your arms....
π︎ 3
π
︎ Oct 21 2020
When my daughter is nauseous, I sing to help relax her...
Apparently she's not a big fan of 'Let It Go'
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 06 2020
What cant you find at Whole Foods?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Sep 04 2020
I cant take My dog to the pond anymore cuz the geese keep attacking him.
I guess thats whats I deserve for having a Pure bread dog
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Feb 15 2020
Why cant the bicycle stand on one leg
π︎ 11
π
︎ Aug 08 2020
why cant you have a 12 inch nose?
Because it would be a foot then.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 20 2020
You cant see him
π︎ 20
π
︎ May 27 2020
You know why you cant fart in an Apple store ?
Because they dont have windows.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jun 27 2020
Why cant you trust an atom?
Because they make up everything.
π︎ 39
π
︎ May 29 2020
My neighbour was a selling a speaker system for just $1. When I asked him why it was so cheap he told me that you cant adjust the sound, the volume is stuck at the loudest setting.
I said "Wow, I cant turn that down"
π︎ 6
π
︎ Aug 02 2020
You gotta hand it to short people.
Because they cant reach it.
π︎ 252
π
︎ Nov 24 2020
Apparently you cant use "beefstew" as a password
I must not be strogonough
(strong enough)
π︎ 222
π
︎ Jan 06 2020
He cant even tell his son.
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Sep 15 2019
Why cant a T-rex clap with his hands?
π︎ 11
π
︎ May 01 2020
I cant believe that locksmiths aren't working in some places
They are key workers after all
π︎ 16
π
︎ May 17 2020
I cant handle how sharp this is.
π︎ 137
π
︎ Nov 29 2019
Dogs cant operate MRI machines
π︎ 9
π
︎ May 10 2020
Star wars celebrity names
Apologies if this breaks the rules however. My friends and I are making up names of star wars characters combined with celebrity names. So far we've come up with Darth spader, sith rogan, and obi wan kobe.
Any others we cant think of?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 16 2020
I told my dad I could run faster than his car he replied how? I said
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 27 2020
You cant hear psychopaths urinating
π︎ 6
π
︎ May 02 2020
My dad just cant articulate dad jokes
I hope his speech therapy works
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 26 2020
I went to the doctors the other day because I cant stop showing off.
They prescribed me some anti gloating cream. I cant wait to rub it in.
π︎ 54
π
︎ Mar 10 2020
Why cant orphans play baseball?
They dont know where home is
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jan 30 2020
Why do some developers need glasses?
π︎ 12
π
︎ Nov 14 2020
Think about all the things that you forgot...
π︎ 10
π
︎ Dec 08 2020
You cant run in a campground
You can only ran, because its past tents.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Feb 25 2020
John Cena: *wakes up in hospital* Where am I? Doctor:ICU John Cena: No you cant
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Jul 20 2018
I told my friend a joke and he fell on the floor from laughter
I guess some people cant stand jokes
π︎ 7
π
︎ Dec 03 2020
What did John say to Marry?
You've been the best part of my life and I cant imagine my life with you. Will you marry me?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 29 2020
What condiment needs to go to the restroom the most?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 10 2020
Alcohol is gay cuz when u are drunk you cant think straight
π︎ 10
π
︎ Oct 06 2019
A bloke wakes up in hospital after an operation and shouts "Doctor I cant feel my legs"
The doctor said i know we chopped your arms off.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Oct 02 2020
Why cant you trust an atom?
Because they make up literally everything.
π︎ 39
π
︎ Dec 05 2019
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.