Darlings you got to let me know. Should I shave or should I grow? If I shave there could be stubble, and if I grow it could be double. So c’mon and let me know ohhhh..
A pre-surgical trans man goes to the doctor
Doc: “Have you had any surgeries?”
F2M: “Yes. I had appendicitis.”
Doc: “Ah. Appendectomy. How can I help you today?”
F2M: “Addadicktome.”
I didn't make this up but I wish I knew who did.
It was a gloomy day for a funeral. The widow weeped quietly in the front row. A distinguished gentleman approached her and said "Ma'am, I'm so sorry for your loss. Would you mind if I said a word?" "Please do", she replied. He stands, straightens his tie, and says "Plethora." Then he sits down. "Thank you," she said.
"That means a lot."
Crushing pop cans is soda pressing
Did you hear the new debate Congress is having on planes?
It’s ok if you haven’t, the decision is still up in the air.
What’d the dog say to the top of the house?
Roof roof roof
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel coming out of the front of his pants....
The bartender says, “what’s up with that?” The pirate says, “Arrrrrr it’s driving me nuts!”
Doodled these on butcher paper with loads of other people, so sorry it's a bit messy imgur.com/gallery/p2jvff7
Why did Luke Skywalker's dad cross the road?
To get to the dark side.
I heard that resistance was futile...
... and I was like, "Ohm my god!"
You should steam your contact lenses
If you want to sterilize
