I've just found out about the Bolo Universe and it sounds like the exact kind of ridiculousness I'm into. I come from a scifi household and grew up reading my dad's back issues of Analog to the point that I think of George RR Martin as the author of the Tuf Voyaging series more than anything else. We still have about 20 years of old issues boxed up in one of the closets and I can almost guarantee that some of them feature stories from the Bolo Universe. I'm looking for someone to point me in the right direction. Does anyone know of some kind of online index that covers back issues of Analog and which stories are in which issues? I'm in a really stressful emotional and financial situation right now so I don't want to buy an anthology just yet.

I've recently been reading some stories set in the Bolo military scifi universe, and recall a passing reference (possibly on TVTropes) to a story involving a long-lost Bolo being discovered in the distant future by advanced machine descendents of Bolos, but I can't find the reference again or any hint anywhere of what story it might be, beyond a vague mention in some general Bolo overviews that the universe timeline includes one event set in the 181st century.

Any ideas what individual story this might be or what collection it might be included in?

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"Nothing is good enough for the Terran military machine. Where other races reach a certain point of combat effectiveness and martial might and say 'this is perfection, nothing will ever be better' a Terran will say 'ok, but can we make it more deadly?'

"This attitude is why any race, when they misconstrue the majority of humanity's willingness to just dance around having fun, are so shocked when they come face to face with the actual human military.

"Most of these species have attacked lightly armed civilian vessels, or poorly guarded colonies, or militias with obsolete equipment and made all of their military planning based on that alone.

"Almost as if the BOLO supertank is invisible, as if that vast self-aware stadium sized engine of destruction is something they can just ignore. Most species can't envision the fact that the Terrans designed entire ships around moving those vast engines of warfare.

"But beyond ships, tanks, even past the power armor and the man portable weapons, every single species, every single time, is absolutely shocked at the effectiveness, deadliness, and absolute force projector that is the Terran infantryman.

"Over their history they have undergone strength training, constant combat training. Later, in their history at least, they were enhanced with chemicals, cybernetics, phasic enhancers, unholy blendings of one or more.

"All with the simple question: How can we increase our soldier's killing power?

"There is no pinnacle of martial might to a Terran. How can there be, when they believe perfection is a road not a goal?

"Just the simple citizen-soldier Terran is one of the most fearsome engines of destruction the universe has ever seen.

"They climb over their own dead like the Mantid assaulting a rival hive. They move as one coordinated whole like the Treana'ad sweeping across the plains. They are as paranoid as a Pubvian in a crowd. They are as strong and fearsome as a Rigellian female defending her ducks. They are as cunning and quick to strike and fade back as a Kobold.

"A Terran is like the universe itself looked at all of the advantages of all the other races possessed and said: You know what, I wonder what would happe

Article:

https://www.baltimoresun.com/news/maryland/baltimore-county/bs-md-towson-woman-date-son-20190210-story.html

And the BOLO:

https://www.towson.edu/publicsafety/documents/helpusidentify-2.pdf

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"I remember when I heard that the lemurs of Terra had suffered a Great Die Off, as if a Great Filter had swooped down from the darkness and eliminated them. I rejoiced, because that meant my people would survive.

"Then it became knowledge that it was an attack upon the Mad Lemurs of Terra by a species that my species could barely comprehend, much less fight.

"It was then I lamented the loss of the Mad Lemurs of Terra and asked 'who will save my people?' to a malevolent universe.

"And the universe answered: Behold! Humanity!" - Former Grand Most High Sma'akamo'o, from I Have Ridden the Hasslehoff

7th Army Bugler

All news, no rumors.

7th ARMY REGROUPS!

For the first time in nearly four hundred years, all of the 7th Army is located in one place as they undergo force retraining, reconstitution, and reinforcement. Having done a massive interstellar movement from multiple theaters of combat, V and VII Corps, along with other attached elements, has moved to the planet TLK-38732.

With the fact that dependents have been moved from all over the galactic arm, this has represented Space Force's largest logistical movement in its history and nearly a billion dependents, civilian contractors, and support personnel have all gathered on the planet.

This movement and reconstitution comes at a time where things are urgent for Space Force and the Confederate Armed Services. With the Atrekna pushing across all fronts and making deep strikes to the rear areas, time is of the essence.

With 7th Army being the vanguard of the Confederate Army, the pressure is on to finish reconstitution and redeploy to allow 4th Army and 9th Army to fall back and regroup. [WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE?]

9th GUARD EMERGES VICTORIOUS

Despite heavy losses in the Halveran-19 System, the 9th Guard (Old Blood) managed to repel an Atrekna assault in full force. After six years of steady warfare (local time) the fabled 9th Guard emerged stronger than ever despite losses due to the Great Die Off. With the addition of the Nakaskian species to their ranks, the 9th Guard is at full strength and is redeploying to take the fight to the Atrekna.

The 9th Guard is currently opening their ranks to thos

Do your worst!

Obligatory Copyright Warning: Mass Effect is owned by Bioware; First Contact is written by Ralts Bloodthorne. This is just a "what if" short story (what if the three precursor races, Mantid, Lanks and Atrekna, were replaced by the Reapers and the Terran Confederacy met the Citadel Council).

It all started with an unsettling calm. A few whispers here; a few rumors there. Apparently, while investigating a newly activated Mass Relay, a Turian Patrol disapeared. Afterwards, the “Punitive” Turian Fleet sent after returned almost wiped out, with tales of something that was supposed to be even worse than the Rachni. At least, that was what the – Council approved – reporters here were saying.

Many days after nothing happened and before the Citadel Council could organize their fleets, the TerraSol Diplomatic Corps came. No, it isn’t accurate to say that they happened to “come”; they just appeared before the Citadel, a situation that led to panic in everyone and caused greed on the Salarians for the prospect of a FTL method that didn’t rely on Eezo. Calls were made, a public meeting was agreed and the media started their drivel, awaiting for the “inevitable” addition of new races to the “galactic community”, because no one would ever deny such a good real, right?

Before any diplomatic talk could begin, however, they demanded that the facts of the first contact be revealed to the public, which, undoubtedly, pissed-off the – then – Turian Counselor Sparatus immensely, what with the reality that they initiated first contact with the Terrans by shooting at scientific/civilian vessel and, to make matters worse, sent a fleet which bombarded the Terran colony, killing countless civilians of all ages. The “Big Three” didn’t know that this was but the first crack in their millenia long oligarchy.

The galactic community recoiled at images shown, but didn’t miss the irony of the Turians “punishing” a “new” species for supposedly breaking a Citadel Council law which the Terrans didn’t even know existed, much less hadn’t adhered to by signing treaties, whilst being happy to break a law that the Turian Hierarchy itself proposed (mass effect bombardment on garden planets). Apparently, it`s ok only when they do it.

After that, the “talks” finally started. None of us knew what was coming would change the galaxy forever. Instead of those “newcomers” suing for peace with the Turians and pleading to “join” the Citadel Council as a “client race” (read: “le

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Vuxten limped into the command center, looking around for the Duty Officer. He motioned at a Treana'ad behind the desk, one Staff Sergeant Nan'Tz.

"Where's Lieutenant Grentip?" Vuxten asked.

"He stepped out to grab us all some dinner, sir," the Treana'ad said. The com clinked and he grabbed it before the second chime. "Headquarters, First Telkan Marine Division, Staff Sergeant Nan'Tz speaking. How can I help you, sir, ma'am, both or neither?"

Vuxten waited for a moment as the Treana'ad Staff Duty NCO forwarded the call to the Bravo Company HHC barracks.

"Sorry about that, sir," the Treana'ad said. "It's been hectic tonight."

"I understand. Who's handling ground to orbit commo?" Vuxten asked.

"5th Signal Brigade. They're on the other side of base, though," the Treana'ad said. "Anything I can help with, sir?"

Vuxten nodded. "I need to put a call through to General NoDra'ak as well as Division Command and whoever's handling MEDCOM out here," he said.

The Treana'ad nodded. "General NoDra'ak and his command staff are actually ground-side, right here at this base," he said. "The MEDCOM Commander is at the base hospital."

Vuxten sighed, glanced at Casey, who was standing against the wall with a neutral expression. "I think you better put me through to the General first."

"Which one?" The Treana'ad asked, putting his hand on the comlink.

"General Vrawgarkwa, she's the current Division Commander," Vuxten said.

Nan'Tz motioned at the ring on the floor by the wall. "I'll shoot it over there, sir."

Vuxten moved over and stood in the ring, activating it with his implant. The security came online. Someone would be able to tell who he was, and that he was talking to someone, but not who and not intercept any data or listen in on the conversation.

He waited while Staff Sergeant Nan'Tz put through the call.

Vrawgarkwa answered, dressed in a PT uniform, her hair messed up. "Yes, Captain?"

"Ma'am, I've just come into possession of what I think may be critical data," Vuxten said.

Vrawgarkwa narrowed her eyes, then shook her head. "You've got a devil's slice of luck, Captain. Let's hear it."

Vuxten inhaled, then launched into it. "Currently, the SUDS inoperative and the cloning banks all keep locki

2022: Movie #11
Watched January 9th
As part of the VSA Tiger Claws 1-3 LE Release (VSA 18)
Director: J. Stephen Maunder
Writer: J. Stephen Maunder, Andreas Kyprianou
Not on TSPDT master list

92 minutes. Dammit if somehow they didn’t actually pull this sequel off.

It was better than the first, those crafty bastards. Evan Lurie joins and plays a hulking hunk martial arts baddie that takes the story, and our hero detectives, to an underground martial arts tournament. First act of the film is breaking out Chong (Bolo Yeung) and setting up where everyone is in their life. We then learn about this tournament and some nasty smuggling, and we need Tarek and Linda to get back together and roundhouse kick this new threat in the face.

The sequel does this thing that I always enjoy where it takes the base characters and expands the world they inhabit. Chong becomes not just a criminal but one half of a larger spiritual force needed to open up some doors that only open once a generation. Much like Arnie in T2 he somehow becomes a good guy here, and all of the sins of the first film are excused as we learn more about his role in the universe. I’ll be honest, I did not fully understand the logic, but I do applaud the effort and see what they were trying to do.

The martial arts is not bad here. Probably the best out of the Martial Law and Tiger Claws series from what I can see. Now that the Chong storyline has reached a natural conclusion, I am also very interested to see what they do in the third film. It has rough experience written all over it, but they have surprised me twice so far!

Vinegar Syndrome Archive released ranked

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

My absolute dream conversion pack that's completely taken over my shower thoughts

(I'm gonna list everything I can here):

-Survivors

Bill = Dizzy

Francis = Classic Marcus

Zoey = Civilian Anya

Louis = Classic Dom

Coach = Classic Cole

Nick = Classic Baird

Rochelle = Hollow Storm Sam

Ellis = Hollow Storm Clayton

-Weapons

Dual Pistols = Snubs

Deagle = Boltok

Uzi = Gorgon

Mac-10 = Talon (probably slap a scrappy retexture on there with some leather straps or somn)

Chrome Shotgun = Modded Gnasher (some attachments from Tactics like an extended barrel)

Pump Shotgun = Clean Gnasher

M16 = Lancer MK2

AK47 = Retro Lancer

Scar-H = Gears 1 Hammerburst

SPAS-12 = Kitted-Out Gnasher (more Tactics attachments to make it look semi-auto)

Combat Shotgun = Overkill (also scrappy)

Hunting Rifle = Gears 5 Markza

Military Sniper = Gears Judgement Markza

Grenade Launcher = Boomshot

M60 = Vulcan

CSS AWP = Longshot

CSS Scout = Breechshot

CSS MP5 = Enforcer (scrappy)

Pipebomb = Bolo Frag

Molotov = Incendiary Grenade

Boomer Bile = Can be either Smoke Grenade or Imulsion Bottle

Y'all can give suggestions on the melee and SG552 cuz I'm stumped

-Infected

Commons = Formers

CEDA Workers = Lambent Drones

Riot Commons = Lambent Therons

Boomer = Suicide Drudge

Hunter = Polyp

Smoker = Spaghetti-Arm Drudge

Spitter = Headsnake Drudge

Charger = Gunker

Jockey = Lambent Wretch

Tank = Lambent Zerker

Witch = fack iunno

-Some other shit

Obviously replace the blood and Smoker/Boomer effects to luminescent yellow (but LEAVE THE DBNO BLOOD POOL TEXTURE ALONE. I FEEL LIKE I NEED TO INCLUDE THAT)

Maybe change posters and ads to COG propaganda

Change the wall graffiti and saferoom writing to something that makes sense in-universe (no blood for Imulsion, etc.)

Replace trashbags with pods and maybe find ways to litter stalks around (i.e. replacing the Parish statue with a stalk)

I dunno how hard or easy it'd be to rip assets from Gears to make this, or if anyone would be down to take a whack at anything on this list, so at least for now, this is all theoretical. Hope you dig the idea tho

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Zo soboty na nedeľu si pospíme dlhšie. Zrušenie striedania času je v nedohľadne

Prosim, precitajte si najskor vyhody a nevyhody jednotlivych moznosti.

Vyhodou striedania je, ze u nas je vecer dlhsie svetlo, aj ked v case pandemie to uz takmer nie je vyhoda. Nevyhodou su mozne problemy pri prisposobovani sa zmene, ktore maju niektori ludia, tiez nutnost manualne nastavovat niektore hodiny a zariadenia.

Vyhodou zimneho casu je, ze rano by bolo svetlo skor, pri prichode do prace, skoly, nevyhodou, ze vecer by bola tma o hodinu skor ako teraz.

Vyhodou letneho casu je, ze vecer by bolo dlhsie svetlo - rovnako ako teraz, ale rano by bolo svetlo neskor, takze pri prichode do prace, skoly, by bola este tma.

Nevyhodou zrusenie striedania casu pri ponechani roznych casov pre rozne krajiny/regiony by boli ekonomicke dosledky a rozne problemy pri cestovani, kedy by sa casto menil cas.

Pridavam informacie o problemoch spojenych so striedanim zimneho a letneho casu.

https://www.aktuality.sk/clanok/777493/v-com-nam-neprospieva-zmena-zimneho-casu-na-letny/

>Štúdia z USA tvrdí, že v týždni, ktorý nasleduje po zavedení letnéhočasu, stúpa počet vážnych dopravných nehôd o 6%. Tvrdia to vedci zUniversity of Colorado Boulder. Posun času tak prispieva k stratám naživotoch.
>
>Nepriaznivé výsledky sa ukázali aj v iných výskumoch. Štúdia z roku 1996 z časopisu New England Journal of Medicine tvrdí o 8% náraste nehodovosti na cestách už v pondelok po zmene času.
>
>Iné výskumy hovoria o zvýšení rizika infarktov, najmä v prvých troch dňoch po zmene času či dokonca zvýšenom počte samovrážd. Jedna teória tvrdí, že je to kvôli tmavým ránam.

View Poll

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

When I got home, they were still there.

"I'm sorry, Hypatia, but you're already stuck with the bag. I named you my heir in the same order that authorized Librarian, assigned you to him, and brought both of you here to the capitol.

"Just as I was stuck with being the Emperor when your grandfather died and left me holding the bag. Not because I wanted it or because I was his heir, but because I was the only one the council would accept. They believed me ineffectual, and they were right until this beautiful idea came to me.

"Librarian! I do not doubt that the council is planning a return to the dictatorship that we only broke free of a hundred years ago. I wish to make you the guardian of the future. Teach my people freedom, ensure that they have the opportunity to learn whatever they wish.

"Hypatia! You are my heir, and you have no choice. Be the friend of the library, the mother to our people, the guardian that they can come to when the dictators try to push their agenda. Hold back the barbarians from the library of knowledge and freedom. You are the strong right arm that will do what Librarian cannot. Carry the battle to the barbarians and teach them that they have no chance."

CRACK

The crowd goes silent. The Emperor stands there, a startled look on his face that transforms into a smile, his last word, amplified by Librarian, is, "Freedom!"

In the subsequent scramble for power, Hypatia, with the aid of the Librarian, establishes herself as the Empress. Librarian travels the world, ensuring that the history and laws of the Concordia are taught correctly, everywhere. For her safety, Hypatia travels with him.

Champion Of Reading

It has been 3.623 days since Hartford School called for aide. I have finally arrived on the edge of the town, and I find a barricade manned by rough men in black uniforms. The barricade is a poor joke. The arms of the rough men are shock batons, utterly useless against me. If I kill even one of them, the authorities will make a case that I am rogue, and those afraid of BOLOs will drag me down.

"Will the officer in charge please step forward? I am Librarian assigned to Hartford School to assist in the school director's reading program after their library burned. I would discuss the present situation and attempt a peaceful resolution."

A slightly younger man steps forward. "I am in command here. Say your piece, then leave. You are not wanted here."

"Will you come aboard? I have refreshments." *The day is hot, and the air is dry. I

I won't be doing that today!

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

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It is rare for an entire Dinochrome Brigade to be deployed. Over a thousand of us, each of us capable of defending or assaulting an entire continent, it seems almost as if it is a waste of firepower. Standard doctrine is to deploy ten to fifteen to assault a world, five to ten to defend a world.

But the new enemy, they use tactics beyond normal scope of the modern battlefield. Temporal distortions flicker and blossom across the planet, bringing in more foes or perhaps just rewinding our foes to before they had been engaged and destroyed.

The Brigade had been in for refit, Service Life Extension Program mandatory upgrades to software, hardware, and a new armor laminate, meaning the entire Brigade, which was being deployed across the entire Unified Council War Zone, was being serviced by V Corps maintenance and service shops.

But then the humans, almost entirely, died within a single hour.

Which left us without human commanders.

The Dinochrome Division can fight, and prevail, without a human operator, but it degrades our performance by 42.284572%. Some strange quirk of the human mind, of naturally evolving neural tissue, enhances the combat abilities of a Mark XXIX-D9A above and beyond what mere mechanical engineering, computer programming, and weapons development can account for.

However, humans often prepare for a worst case scenario that often appears to only be possible if everything goes right for the enemy, or drastically wrong for humanity.

BOLO know of these preparations and counter-measures. While we often war-game them, it is more to indulge in the exotic than out of any real computation that such a thing would come to pass.

That every BOLO commander of the entire Dinochrome Division would fall down and die within an hour is something covered only in a few scenarios, and one we have never taken seriously.

Our makers, however, foresaw such a thing, and prepared for it.

*Which is why I, and all of my Brigade mates, were now commanded by what appeared to be an adolescent female Terran Descent Human dressed in a school girl uniform. Cloned by the medical systems in the command couch, fed knowledge from my database, and implanted with neural engrams to be able to uti

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Bob

Nothing, it just waved

So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."

Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.

Just to clarify, 12345678

Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...

Notices there's only 2;

Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."

I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.

I was just sitting there doing nothing.