The other day I went to the graveyard and got two dead bodies
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︎ Oct 04 2022
I was never a big fan of moles on bodies,
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︎ Sep 08 2022
I keep asking what is the term for a narrow passage of water connecting two larger bodies of water?
But no one will give me a strait answer.
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︎ Aug 19 2022
When women put on bikinis, they reveal 90% of their bodies..,
Men are so polite, they only look at the covered parts.
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︎ Jul 29 2022
I hate stuck up bodies of water
Get over yourself Lake Superior!
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︎ Jun 15 2022
How do celestial bodies start getting ready for a party?
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︎ May 09 2022
I got in trouble for letting people take bodies from the morgue for free after my boss saw the evidence.
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︎ May 05 2022
Can you tell me where I can find dead bodies?
Why yes, theyβre right around the coronerβ¦
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︎ Feb 21 2022
What do you call the study of astrological bodies?
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︎ Jan 12 2022
Anty bodies
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︎ Jun 18 2019
It took my friend a lot of balls to appear in the Reality TV show βEmbarrassing Bodiesβ.
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︎ Jun 13 2021
4 Norse gods, 1 roman God, and 2 astrological bodies walk into a bar
The bartender says: Oh, this is gonna be a week joke
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︎ Oct 29 2020
How many dead bodies are buried in the average American cemetery?
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︎ Jun 01 2021
Why do Arab cannibals always have the best bodies?
Because they only ever eat protein Sheiks!
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︎ Jul 29 2021
Man, decomposing bodies is tough right?
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︎ Jun 14 2021
Hidden bodies
A new strain of head lice has appeared that is resistant to conventional treatments. This has left scientists scratching their heads.
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︎ Jun 28 2021
Funeral homes might start displaying bodies of the deceased again after Covid-19 lockdown...
But that remains go be seen.
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︎ May 17 2021
There was this shop in my hometown located where two streets met, they sold things like embalming tools and other specialty tools for working on dead bodies. This store was also known as....
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︎ Jan 08 2020
There was a lumberjack who moonlighted as a serial killer. He used wood chippers to dispose of the bodies, which is why he was so prolific.
Every once in a while, these guys come out of the woodwork.
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︎ Jan 04 2021
A funeral home got busted for raffling dead bodies off to med schools.
Police said it was a dead giveaway.
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︎ Feb 27 2020
Breaking news: Irish officials have reported that a passenger 747 has crashed into a Belfast cemetery. Investigators have discovered over ten thousand dead bodies at the scene. One local witness at a nearby pub claimed it was a Guinness record.
To be sure. Iβll let myself out.....
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︎ May 14 2020
Oceans are the friendliest bodies of water.
They always greet you with a wave.
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︎ Nov 27 2015
Most fisherman hold their fish far away from their bodies when they take pictures. This is why they think they're so much bigger than they are.
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︎ Dec 20 2019
There are extremely large bodies of water that have never been touched in any way before.
I guess you could call them the virgin seas.
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︎ Jun 21 2019
Showed my Dad Warm Bodies the other day, he caught me off guard this time.
If you don't know the movie, there's a scene where the main character (R) is attempting to drive a car and he's starting and stopping because he can't control his limbs fully.
So my dad just quietly goes. "Makes sense, he's got bad motor control."
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︎ Jan 26 2018
How did the ant serial killer cleanly dispose of his victimβs bodies?
He dissolved them in antacid.
Ba-dum⦠tsss!
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︎ May 11 2019
I went to a nightclub called Dislocated Bodies.
Everyone there seemed a bit out of place.
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︎ Oct 19 2018
I went into a crypt but couldn't recognize the bodies
I guess they were encrypted.
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︎ Sep 28 2018
I called the police because a man was screaming about large bodies of water and outdoor storage units, but when the police arrived they couldn't arrest him, as he denied everything.
It was a real "He Said Sea Shed" situation.
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︎ Aug 24 2018
The wounds were caused by foreign bodies.
https://www.reddit.com/r/quityourbullshit/comments/5vemhh/texas_hunters_who_accidentally_shot_each_other/
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︎ Feb 22 2017
I despise stuck-up bodies of water.
Get over yourself, Lake Superior!
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︎ Nov 21 2021
It took a lot of balls for my friend to go on the Reality TV show called βEmbarrassing Bodies.β
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︎ Sep 20 2019
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