Some people were wondering why I like American cheese so much

It’s cause it’s free

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The-feel-when
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
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Why isn't American cheese considered actual cheese?

Its got no culture!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/garmdian
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2019
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I ordered a sandwich with American cheese, but it came to the table with cheddar cheese instead.

It was a queso mistaken identity.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/naurugger
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2019
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American grocery stores are going to start selling Parmesan cheese in chunks

To make America grate again!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/etawong
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
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I fixed my student's drawing on "American Cheese".
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ms_Business
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2017
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I'll never understand how Americans use cheese from tubes or slices as everyday food...

We should definitely make America grate again.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/newbieatthegym
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2016
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I work at Subway

Yesterday a lady was wondering what type of cheese she should put on her sub so I recommended the Swiss cheese because, as I put it, "The Swiss cheese is always really neutral".

The worst part is she didn't even laugh.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Admiral_Sarcasm
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2014
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I know this is cheesy, but I laughed! imgur.com/RLX04Dq
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kawww
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2015
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The hidden puns of LexisNexis

Years ago I used to use a LexisNexis database of companies that would give corporate information like name, address, and general business description. While most of them were pretty bland, there were a bunch of them with some really cheesy puns, and over a few years I built quite a collection.

Today I share with you "NEXIS IS RIDICULOUS.txt":

  • Bucyrus International caters to those who mine their own business.
  • It would be logical for Mr. Spock to boldly go to Vulcan International for rubber products. He might even live long and prosper -- in comfortable shoes.
  • What do manufacturer Electro-Motive Diesel (EMD) and 1970s band Grand Funk Railroad have in common? They both want you to do the locomotion!
  • Peter Piper can pick more than a peck of peppers or pickles from B&G Foods.
  • Toray Plastics America could sing "foam, foam on the range, where the polyester and polypropylene materials are made" all day.
  • Break out the Tums, because things are awfully gassy over at Air Liquide America.
  • If a tree falls in a Weyerhaeuser forest, someone is there to hear it -- and he has a chainsaw.
  • Although not a pushover, you can walk all over Wilsonart International.
  • Here's a HEICO haiku: HEICO companies/ Providing for jet engines/ In flight or on land.
  • American Italian Pasta Company (AIPC) uses its noodle in many different ways.
  • The golf industry doesn't mind when Aldila gives it the shaft.
  • Rat-a-tat-tat and a ringa-ding-ding. What's that? Answer: The sounds emanating from Pearl, one of the world's foremost makers of drums and other percussion and musical instruments.
  • Saint-Gobain Ceramics & Plastics deals powders and crystal, but there's no need to call the cops.
  • Pamida Stores Operating Company offers more small-town values than a bandwagon of Republicans on the campaign trail.
  • Like a tight end, offshore drilling contractor Transocean dreams of going deep but doesn't mind eating a little mud.
  • Rittal me this, Batman!
  • Utility Trailer Manufacturing is spreading its own brand of reefer madness.
  • Who is the Fresh Prince of Sullair?
  • If GrafTech International were a bard, it could wax poetic in an ode to the electrode.
  • When it comes to adhesives and vibration control products, LORD knows.
  • You might say that Deere & Company enjoys its customers going to seed.
  • Pfizer pfabricates pfarmaceuticals pfor quite a pfew inpfirmities.
  • Stripping is OK at Spraylat.
  • Don't think Seton is
... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2016
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Had my first dad joke at dinner tonight.

Dad - "These burgers have gouda cheese on them, and those have white American on them."

Me - "These burgers are gouda, but THOSE burgers are bedda"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThatAnalogKid
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2015
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Working at the pizza shop when a kid shows up...

..and asks for a slice of cheese.

I walk over to the fridge and give the kid a slice of American cheese.

"That's $2.75."

That kid let out the loudest groan.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mr_flibble13
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2014
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