They're much more likely to be inciders.
(spoiler) The main character is brought to the realization that he killed his girlfriend after resolving the crime scene with his nemesis in a 'mystical' cave journey.
Breakfast: eggs, bacon, scrapple. Dutch baby for carb eaters.
Lunch: shrimp cocktail or remoulade, smoked salmon, veggies and dip
Dinner: smoked ham, baked buttercup squash, roasted broccoli and asparagus, potatoes for carb eaters, and biscuits.
Dessert: keto peanut butter pie from the keto bakers, blackberry cobbler for the carb eaters.
I'm hungry! Nothing special for Christmas eve...
EDIT: Tell me your location too. Western NY state. Also there will be cheese....
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
I was hiking with my Dad in late September on the West Coast of Vancouver Island, which is usually when Bears are fattinging up for hibernation and most likely to be aggressive and since we were a couple days walk from either trailhead (and medical attention) we were on high alert. It had rained constantly and we had only seen a single other hiker the whole time, he was traveling in the opposite direction as we were (he was heading North we were South bound) and we had camped beside him 2 nights prior. So for the whole trip the only tracks that we saw that looked remotely fresh were a single set of hiking boots coming towards us left by a pleasant and solitary German tourist and we only saw them in places with extensive overhead cover. All other tracks were washed out and filled with rain water due to the days and days of constant rain that was doing the best it could to fuck up our vacation and make our packs even heavier.
We were approaching a blackberry patch between ridges that hugged a small creek and smelled what we thought was a particularly stinky Bear and since the blackberries were on both sides of the trail with only about 3 metres between them, we had our heads on a swivel. There was no overhanging trees as this particular berry patch was dozens of metres across and two or more metres high. My Dad told me to hurry through as quick as we could and made a comment about how smart it was that we were wearing Bearbells and how dangerous it is to startle a feeding Bear. He was a couple metres ahead of me when I looked down and saw a footprint.
It looked like an unshoed human footprint, except that it was two inches wider and at least two inches longer than mine, and I have size 14 feet. It also had dermal ridges and only had a couple rain drops in it, so whatever made it had stepped there literally moments before. The scariest thing about it was that there was no other prints so whatever had made that track had stepped out of the Eastern side of the berry patch across the trail (3 metres) and into the Western patch in a single step. I was so startled I looked around as much as I could before my Dad lovingly told me to "Hurry the fuck up." And that was the only track there that wasn't now a small puddle, so before you discount it as a double stepping Bear paw print (where a Bear's back paw steps into the print of it's front paw) there is no way a Black Bear could have crossed that 3 metre distance without leaving more prints, say what you want a
... keep reading on reddit ➡Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB
Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"
I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual
So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes
r/unclejokes for dirty jokes
r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC
r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes
Punchline !
Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub
Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat
Do your worst!
Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.
But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"
Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?
And now I’m cannelloni
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
