The wife left me because I have a fetish for touching pasta
Now Iβm feeling cannelloni
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︎ May 06 2021
So touching
π︎ 4k
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︎ Jan 03 2021
The touching in this image is completely nonsexual
π︎ 8
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︎ Apr 23 2021
The wedding was so touching that
even the cake was in tiers.
Edit: Thank you so much guys! I never expected this to reach 10k upvotes! You guys truly made my day.
π︎ 12k
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︎ Nov 01 2020
What can you hold without touching it?
π︎ 2
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︎ Feb 12 2021
A touching conversation
π︎ 891
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︎ Sep 29 2020
Heart transplant is a really heart touching surgery
π︎ 8
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︎ Nov 23 2020
Touching
π︎ 64
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︎ Nov 15 2020
Why is my stud finder constantly going off even when it isn't touching the wall?
Oh wait... I'm holding it.
π︎ 2
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︎ Jan 10 2021
A man had a fetish for touching and hearing, one day his friend got mad and slapped and yelled at the man
He ended up coming to his senses
π︎ 22
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︎ Dec 09 2020
I used to get painful shocks when touching a doorknob...
...but not anymore! I'm ex-static!
π︎ 37
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︎ Aug 27 2020
The invention of the shovel was just touching the surface of what today's is groundbreaking technology can achieve.
π︎ 4
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︎ Feb 11 2020
Why do bacteria wait 5s before touching the food?
they first have to skip an ad.
π︎ 3
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︎ May 07 2020
I love watching touching videos of people helping each other.
Iβm just afraid that itβs not social distancing.
π︎ 3
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︎ Mar 19 2020
My last girlfriend left me because of my obsession with touching pasta.
Feeling cannelloni right now.
π︎ 117
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︎ Oct 12 2018
What do you call an it teacher touching up his students..?
π︎ 6
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︎ Nov 23 2019
I went to a car show in a huge warehouse and everyone was just touching all the cars filling the huge room...
It was wall-to-wall car petting.
π︎ 6
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︎ Mar 08 2019
I was teaching in the classroom when I suddenly started touching one of my pupils.
The itching in my eye was really out of control.
π︎ 7
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︎ Jan 02 2019
I've always gotten small shocks when touching metal objects, but that stopped recently.
Needless to say, I'm ex-static.
π︎ 127
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︎ Jan 10 2017
A guy walks up to his son and says,"Son, if you don't stop touching yourself, you will go blind."
Son says,"Dad, I'm over here."
π︎ 5
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︎ Apr 13 2019
I have a friend who can tell what a kitchen top is made of just by touching it.
π︎ 225
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︎ Nov 30 2016
There was a surgeon who accidentally killed a patient by touching his heart with his bear hands.
He gave the patient's family a heartfelt apology.
π︎ 15
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︎ May 11 2017
My wife got so mad at me when I kept touching her with the remote...
She said, βWhat are you doing!?β
Me, βsheesh, just trying to turn you onβ
π︎ 6
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︎ Oct 10 2018
I just watched this wonderful and touching movie about a chef in Northern China.
Set in Northern China, this movie follows the rite of passage of a jaded, aimless Chinese chef who falls in love with a worn out cooking pan that he and his friends once scorned. The two develop a powerful and inspirational relationship in which they discover truths about cooking that take most people a lifetime to learn. It's called A Wok to Remember
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︎ Sep 07 2016
What is the most touching death a tree can hope for?
π︎ 3
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︎ Jul 29 2018
A friend of mine was saying that touching his toes counted as a workout
I thought it was a bit of a stretch
π︎ 10
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︎ Sep 11 2016
The wedding vows were so touching...
Even the cake was in tiers.
(Obligatory cake day joke.)
π︎ 43
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︎ Sep 25 2020
My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with touching pasta.
Iβm feeling cannelloni right now.
π︎ 21
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︎ Aug 10 2019
I always used to get small shocks when touching metal objects, but it recently stopped.
Needless to say, I'm ex-static.
π︎ 11
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︎ Oct 04 2018
I always used to get small shocks when touching metal objects, but it recently stopped...
Needless to say, I'm ex-static...
π︎ 23
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︎ Apr 14 2017
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