Was eating dinner with my wife when she quickly got up for seconds. βIβm starved! I havenβt been eating rightβ, she said. So I asked:
βIs that why you are eating everything thatβs left?β
π︎ 17
π
︎ Apr 30 2019
I starved myself all day to get ready for the pi competition
There was no pie... only people reciting pi from memory. The pie was a lie
π︎ 3
π
︎ Mar 14 2019
I hope you're not starved for time
π︎ 10
π
︎ Aug 18 2016
Figuring out how to starve a zombie isnβt difficult.
π︎ 36
π
︎ Nov 29 2020
Have a riot at this pun
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Jan 12 2021
I just received a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my old clothes to the starving people around the world...
I told them, "Anyone who fits into my clothes, certainly isn't starving. "
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 17 2020
Dad, Iβm starving can you make me a sandwhich?
Abracadabra you are a sandwich
π︎ 430
π
︎ Sep 02 2020
What do you call starving vegans?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 28 2020
A wife says to her husband: "Honey, I want to donate my clothes to people who are starving."
The husband replys: "Debra whoever receives your clothes surely won't be starving."
(I apologise if this has already been posted, I just heard my dad say it to me today.)
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jul 03 2020
You won't ever starve In the desert
Because of all the sand-which is there.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Aug 11 2020
What did the stout, starving sergeant eat in the army?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Aug 12 2020
lets play dont starve: together
π︎ 63
π
︎ May 05 2020
A starving tribe marched their way to the desert to get food
because of the sand which is there.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 25 2020
I would only kill a clown if my family was about to starve to death.
We either digest the clown, or we die jesting!
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 28 2020
What do you call a starving hippo in Budapest?
π︎ 43
π
︎ Mar 15 2020
A jewish pastor becomes a missionary...
...and ends up on the Island of Trid. The people there are starving and explain to the pastor that itβs because whenever they try to harvest the fruit at the top of the mountain, the nasty giant comes out of his cave and boots them all back down the hill. This infuriates the pastor who then declares that tomorrow he will join them on their next attempt. The next day they all march up the mountain together, and sure enough, out comes the giant who proceeds to kick all of the locals back down the hill leaving only the new guy to gather fruit at his leisure. Finally, he stops and asks the giant, βWell, arenβt you going to knock me off the mountain?β. Shaking his head, the giant says, βSilly rabbi, kicks are for Tridsβ.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 13 2021
Baby Humpback: Dad. If you keep eating all the food and not saving any for me, I'm going to starve to death!
Dad Humpback: Nah. Whatever doesn't krill you makes you stronger.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 19 2019
A man is starving in the desert and sees a bacon tree in the distance.
When he makes it over to the tree, a robber steps out and points a gun at him.
The man says, "whoa, I just wanted some of the bacon from the bacon tree!"
The robber grunts and says, "This ain't no bacon tree. This is a hambush!"
π︎ 13
π
︎ Dec 06 2019
Son, the best piece of advice I can give you is not to starve yourself. It doesn't help anything.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 07 2019
Why was 69 starving?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 02 2019
How come you canβt starve in the desert?
Because of all the sand which is there
π︎ 27
π
︎ Jun 16 2019
my great grandfather was a very poor eastern european, starving on the streets
some say he's still hungary to this day
π︎ 6
π
︎ Aug 29 2019
Why did the robot starve?
He didnβt have a byte to eat...
π︎ 3
π
︎ Sep 02 2019
If you're ever lost in the Sahara desert, at least you won't starve.
Because of all the sand-which-is there.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Feb 06 2019
Why can no man starve in the Great Desert of Sahara?
Because of the sand-which-is there. β ba dum tissss!
π︎ 8
π
︎ May 09 2019
Have you heard of the benefit concert to help starving musicians?
They're calling it Band-Aid.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Dec 27 2018
Why is it impossible to starve in the desert?
Because of all the sand which is there. (Read aloud)
π︎ 10
π
︎ Apr 03 2019
π︎ 8
π
︎ Jan 27 2019
Did you hear about the cheap farmer that let a town starve?
π︎ 33
π
︎ Feb 16 2018
Iβm starving
I just woke up and feel like I havenβt eaten all year
π︎ 79
π
︎ Jan 01 2018
Iβm starving
I havenβt eaten since last year.
Happy new year everyone :)
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 31 2018
I got lost in a corn maze for a couple days last year
Needless to say I was starving, as fate would have it a ripe piece fell down right at my feet. Startled I called out βwell I guess itβs on the house!β To my amazement the stalk came to life and said βNonsense! Itβs on the cob!β
π︎ 3
π
︎ Sep 05 2020
I saw a starving cat the other day
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 07 2018
Irish dream come true
π︎ 3k
π
︎ Sep 29 2018
Figuring out how to starve a zombie is a no brainer.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 29 2020
Why don't you starve in the desert?
Because of all the sand which is there.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Jun 24 2020
Why is it you will never starve in the desert?
Because of all the sand which is there.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Nov 26 2019
Why is it you'll never starve in the desert?
Because of all the sand wich is there.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Aug 23 2019
Why canβt a man starve in the desert?
Because of all of the sand which is there.
π︎ 57
π
︎ Jan 12 2019
You'll never starve in the desert...
Because of all the sand-which-is there.
π︎ 75
π
︎ Feb 27 2018
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