If, instead of Robert Downey Jr., Matthew Broderick starred in 'Iron Man'...
... we'd be calling him 'Ferrous Bueller.'
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and thinking to myself....
Where the fuck is my roof ?
Quick reference for Star Wars: Chewie is short for Chewbacca, Ben Kenobi is short for Obi-Wan Kenobi...
...and Luke Skywalker is short for a storm trooper
A dwarf has started a company selling inhabitable Star Trek spaceships
It’s a small scale enterprise
My son Luke loves it that we named all our kids after Star Wars characters...
My daughter Chewbacca, not so much.
My wife screamed at me, "You're obsessed with those Star Wars movies. I've had enough. I'm leaving you."
"May divorce be with you!!" I replied.
I was outside, laying down, at night, admiring the stars and the moon
Our son Luke loves that we chose Star Wars characters as an inspiration when naming our kids.
His sister Chewbacca is less thrilled.
Chewbacca of Star Wars was once a great baseball player in The Major Leagues. . . . . .
Seriously, he won Wookie of the year.
I've got the body of a porn star....
All my clothes says XXXX.
Who stared as Han Solo in the Scandinavian remake of Star Wars?
I had a Wookie burger at a Star Wars cafe
William Shatner, Star Trek’s Captain Kirk, is said to be extremely disappointed after the collapse of his recently launched women’s underwear business...
Apparently, nobody was interested in buying ‘Shatner Panties’.
My wife left me because of my obsession with horoscopes
I promised my new girlfriend the sun, the moon and the stars....
So, I took her to the planetarium.
My spouse left me because of my obsession with Star Wars.
Divorce is strong with this one.
Who is Yodas favourite pop star
Why haven’t aliens visited our Solar System yet?
They looked at the reviews... only 1 star
Skeptic: This ninja star can never fit through that gap!
Jesus Christ Snooker Star.
Ever since the Death Star blew up, Anakin has taken to the NY Stock Exchange
I recently played in a Star Wars themed cricket match.
Every time the ball was delivered the Umpire struck back.
My favorite Star Wars character is a philosopher
Tell a man there are three hundred billion stars in the universe, and he believes you.
Tell him a bench has wet paint on it, and he has to touch it to be sure.
Becoming a rock star…
…might make you feel boulder.
Every star is holy. Why, you ask?
Because they all have mass!
How do you humiliate a reality t.v. star ?
What does Mission Impossible's star give when he f**ks up?
I was at a Star Wars themed restaurant.....
I had Sky Walker soup. Wookie steak and Death Star ice cream.
The starter and the dessert were lovely, but the main course was a bit chewy.
Last night as I lay in bed staring at the stars I thought to myself
Where the heck is the ceiling?
When I woke up this morning, I saw a bird of prey sitting in my backyard eating avocado toast.
It was a millennial falcon.
Why don't the Jedi take off their shirts to greet each other?
Because only a Sith deals in ab salutes.
Wise men followed a Star-Bucks...
So I was laying in bed last night, looking up at the stars.
Then I realised. Where the f*** is my roof?
You ever heard the Stormtrooper band?
Probably not, they've never had a hit.
Star Trek Halloween Special
Funny how in the past everyone owned horses and only the rich owned cars, and now everyone has cars and only the rich have horses...
My how the stables have turned.
Edit: Wow guys, thanks for all the love!
What about the star?
My husband and I finally finished decorating the Christmas tree tonight. There’s always a star and we forgot to grab the box from the basement. I said to my husband, “What about the star?” Without skipping a beat, he says, “It’s 2020. Zero stars.”
My son Luke loves that we named him after a Star Wars character.
My daughter Chewbacca not so much
My son Luke loves that we named our children after Star Wars characters.
My daughter Chewbacca, not so much.
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