A list of puns related to "Stalkers"
"That's slander, man."
Leaf me alone.
A clipboard and pen
I nearly fell out of my tree.
The other corn replies, βThats amaizing! Is he cute?β The ear replies, βNo, too husky!β
The Private Investigator get's paid, and the stalker is pursuing his passion.
The ICU
I really wanna follow in his footsteps
Because the corn was a stalker.
I met a stranger oββn tββhe tββube tββhe oββther dββay. He didn't say 'hello', as a normal person might. Instead, he sββaid, "ββRemember Matt Damon".
That seems a little bit weird... but it gets weirder. The next day, I passed the same fellow on the street, while I was out walking my dog. He called out to me once again, "Remember Matt Damon".
But I finally cracked it and called the cops after the SAME guy tββapped oββn mββy bedroom wββindow, aββt 1ββ1.30 pm last nββight. He called to me, loud enough for me to clearly hear him through the glass, "ββRemember Matt Damon."
My conversation with the police then went like this:
Me: Officer, I think I have a stalker.
Policeman: can you tell me anything about this person?
Me: Well... uhhh... he reminds me of Matt Damon...
I gave it a lot of shit this morning
(Long time stalker, heres my first dad joke!)
Because it was soda-pressing
Was at dinner tonight with my girlfriends family and her sister brought her new puppy over. Their step dad left the room momentarily and the puppy followed him.
GF: Oh, jeeze <step dad>, you've got a little stalker!!
Me: Oh no!!! We better call the pawlice!
Rest of table: <audible groans>
I'm only 22, but I like to think I have a bit of dad in me already.
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