My father in law attempted a dad joke. I ruined it.

Father in law: Have you ever seen pine nuts?

Me: Yah why?

FIL: How did you get it to spread it's legs(snickers)

Me: Log splitter (drinks beer)

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/insanotard
📅︎ Oct 17 2017
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My daughter was playing a game on her laptop

Me: What are you playing? Kid: Bubble Splitter

Me: I played that game before but I got in trouble for splitting bubbles. Kid: Why?

Me: Bubbles was the next door neighbor. Wife: Gross. Don't be disgusting.

👍︎ 8
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📅︎ Jul 19 2014
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