Who do the Spice Girls speak to when they have an issue with one another?
π︎ 35
π
︎ Mar 14 2021
Have you ever wandered why it takes the President so long to complete a sentence when he speaks?
I guess heβs just Biden his time.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 19 2021
I have 10 pet geese,out of which 8 speak perfect English.
The last two are Portuguese.
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π
︎ Feb 28 2021
Hi, I can speak parrot!
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 17 2021
Which language do Mexican snakes speak?
π︎ 9
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︎ Feb 22 2021
What language does an unhappy toddler speak?
π︎ 2
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︎ Mar 10 2021
My dad's not allowed to speak Japanese, let alone teach the language. But there's nothing that says he can't teach Japanese cooking and geography. So far, I just learned the cooking tools and the location of the country.
This is Japan, this is ja-spatula, this is ja-whisk, this is ja-wok, this is ja-mixer, this is ja-fork, this is ja-spoon, and these are ja-chopsticks.
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π
︎ Jan 24 2021
Iβm planning a trip to the Farsi-speaking part of Ontario
Iβve always wanted to visit the Persian Guelph
π︎ 10
π
︎ Feb 26 2021
The owner of the Indianpolis Colts will be in trouble if he has to speak in court, because no matter what he says the judge will think...
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jan 28 2021
I taught my cat to speak and ask her why does she hate vacuum cleaners.
βThey suckβ said the cat.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Feb 24 2021
Why canβt an egg speak publicly?
π︎ 303
π
︎ Dec 06 2020
I believe I speak for almost all of us here
*Good morning
*Buenos dias
*Bonjour
*Guten Morgen
*Boungiorno
*Bom dia
*God morgon
*Selamat pagi
*Goedemorgen
*God morgen
*Dobroye utro
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 26 2021
ton fils sΓ©rieux?
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Feb 14 2021
A Jonathan Galindo but can speak multiple languages
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
I need to speak with the chair
π︎ 50
π
︎ Dec 17 2020
So you find the perfect Asian gal, you get up the courage to speak to her, you walk over and start small talk, you ask her name, and you find out...
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 12 2021
I like to say mucho when iβm talking to my Spanish speaking friends.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 27 2021
A blind man walks into a bar
And then a table...
And then a chair...
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Feb 10 2021
I confronted a mime today.
He did unspeakable things.
Thank you for the awards. You made my day π
π︎ 7k
π
︎ Feb 14 2021
9yo shared this one with me: What do you call a cow who just had a baby?
De-calf-inated!
Edit: it's been pointed out some people pronounce calf as cΔlf, so its taking a second. Pronounce it like decaffeinated coffee.
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Feb 24 2021
What state in the US speaks Japanese?
π︎ 15
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
What paper product speaks really quickly?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
I called to speak to my doctor and the receptionist asked "May I ask who's calling?"
I replied "Yes you may, go right ahead and ask"
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 20 2021
What language do garbage collectors speak?
π︎ 52
π
︎ Oct 30 2020
Two people agreed to never speak to each other secretly
It was an unspoken agreement.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 25 2020
Scientifically speaking, of course.
π︎ 17
π
︎ Sep 19 2020
TIL Albert Einstein was a real person
I always thought he was only a theoretical physicist...
π︎ 157
π
︎ Mar 13 2021
I speak in simplified fractions
Half of what I say makes sense
π︎ 16
π
︎ Oct 16 2020
My grandad used to say "If it wasn't for me, you'd all be speaking German right now" Lovely man, terribly bad foreign language teacher.
No idea why the school hired him.
π︎ 67
π
︎ Nov 10 2020
At what time of the year do women speak the least?
February. It has the least days.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
π︎ 37
π
︎ Aug 22 2020
My wife is blaming me for ruining her birthday
Thatβs ridiculous, I didnβt even know it was her birthday
π︎ 169
π
︎ Mar 01 2021
A Spanish-speaking magician announced that would disappear on the count of three. "Uno...dos...." POOF!
He disappeared without a tres.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Nov 21 2020
I try to use the word mucho as much as I can around my Spanish-speaking friends.
π︎ 37
π
︎ Oct 20 2020
A person who cannot see is known as blind, a person who cannot speak is known as mute. So, what do you call a person who cannot hear?
Anything you want to call them, they cannot hear.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Sep 25 2020
To kill a French vampire, you have to drive a baguette through it's heart.
Sounds easy, but the process is painstaking .
π︎ 16k
π
︎ Nov 02 2020
Do you speak Spanish?
A) No
B) A little
C) SeΓ±or
π︎ 362
π
︎ May 05 2020
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
π︎ 16
π
︎ Sep 10 2020
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 16 2020
What do you call a car that wants to speak to the manager
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 20 2020
In an alternate universe, Hercules was a girl.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Oct 31 2020
If you make dad jokes, what language do you speak?
Pun-Jabi
proceeds to the nearest exit
π︎ 7
π
︎ Oct 28 2020
What do Spanish speaking people prefer to travel in groups of 2 or 4?
π︎ 12
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︎ Oct 19 2020
Introducing the new rhyme speaking Green Onion with the super tight back beat! Please welcome the one! The only---
π︎ 15
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︎ Sep 26 2020
Ah yes. I can speak mandarin too
π︎ 38
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︎ Aug 16 2020
Respect the trees
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︎ Dec 23 2020
Sorry,I donβt speak Mandarin.
π︎ 28
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︎ Aug 15 2020
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