What’s the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 110
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Nickatier_Carbs
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
My boyfriend asked me what's the leading cause of dry skin?

Towel!!!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/stannaso
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 19 2021
🚨︎ report
An elderly inventor was becoming depressed with his life: his hearing was failing, his wife was always nagging him, he hadn't invented anything good in years, and his former good looks had been replaced by wrinkles and sagging skin.

He goes to the doctor to discuss his depression. When he arrives back home he has a huge smile on his face. He rushed past his wife and heads into the basement, where he immediately starts tinkering with a brand new invention.

His wife comes downstairs, gives the invention a once-over, then asks "What on earth is this thing, and how this supposed to help your depression?".

"Honey, the doctor told me working on this should have me feeling better in no time!" replies the man. He then proceeds to describe in detail how the machine cracks eggs, steams them, and flips them out onto a plate in under a minute, all at the touch of a button.

"But what on earth does this have to do with your depression? What did that quack doctor tell you to do?" asks the wife

The man replies: "He told me to work on my self egg-steam".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Musicferret
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 17 2021
🚨︎ report
I get most of my news as a cream that I rub on my skin

It is pretty topical.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Samwyzh
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 14 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you need to get rid of a demon with a skin condition?

An Exorcyst.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Apollonius_Cone
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 10 2021
🚨︎ report
Does anyone know if it's possible to have a skin graft taken from a buttock to donate to someone who isn't a relative?

Arse skin for a friend.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 126
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Geofferz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did it take dad an hour to choose which skin cream to buy?

He didn't want to make a rash decision.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 84
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RedPlanetCorridor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 30 2021
🚨︎ report
Whats the leading cause of dry skin? /r/Jokes/comments/lu8fbg/…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/YOU_TUBE_PERSON
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 28 2021
🚨︎ report
Why was the man who removed 10 potato skins in 1 minute so attractive?

He had secs a peel.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ambutter15
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
I remember a time when plastic surgery was a taboo subject, but nowadays when you mention botox..

..no one even raises an eyebrow.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 01 2021
🚨︎ report
My therapist said the best treatment for depression is to vigorously rub salt into my skin, to draw out excess moisture....

WOW....I'm cured.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 115
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a tariff on skin?

A tax-a-dermis!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/impendingcrown
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Moisturiser is good for your skin...

Let that sink in.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine needs skin grafts for surgery, but thankfully, he doesn't need donors.

That's no skin off of my nose!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DoomRulz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 10 2021
🚨︎ report
I found the number one cause of dry skin!

Towels!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/runew0lf
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I took my grandma to one of those fish spas where the fish eat all your dead skin.

So much cheaper than burying her in the cemetery.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
How many skin divers does it take to circumcise a whale?

4

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Last evening I walked up the hill in the park to see the planets. Stumbled over a lip in the concrete and went down pretty hard. Ripped pants and skinned hands and knees. When I got to the top I couldn't see a thing.

The view was not worth the trip.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/I_Think_Naught
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife hates my collection of old snake skins.

So I have to keep them in the shed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/weirdgroovynerd
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I could have sworn that my skin had changed color

But it was just a pigment of my imagination

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/skinhat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is the skin of tree trunks called bark?

Because it's rough.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 79
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/wotmate
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the oldest age someone could get a circumcision?

I just want to know the cutoff date.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
We just bought our new dream house and as I was showing our daughter around for the first time, she asked excitedly, "What's upstairs!?" I chuckled and replied, "Awwwww sweetie...."

"Stairs don't talk!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Your epidermis is showing.

That’s it. That’s the joke.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lostenzo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I recently opened a building with an exhibition of dermatological skin cases.

It’s a real gallery of the fine warts.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/C0NSTABEL
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the best armor for stealth?

Leather. It's made of hide.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 743
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/twilighttruth
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I had bunch of lumps on my skin

My friends started freaking out. They wouldn’t stop either. So I said β€œ I incyst you don’t abscess over this

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Haywired4
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried to substitute eggroll skins instead of the usual for my fried Chinese dumplings. They tasted the same, but came out rectangular.

I guess it's back to square won.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What's a word that gets under your skin?

Subcutaneous.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/amalgamxtc
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Mom here but hope you like it. Why do skeletons stay calm?

Nothing gets under their skin

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/skydiamond01
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 26 2021
🚨︎ report
When I was a young boy, I was walking down a gravel road with my grandpa. I accidentally slipped and fell to the ground, cutting my knees. Grandpa gently bent down and began to clean the wound, removing the little pebbles now embedded in my skin as I cried...

I'd always heard adults talk about it, but I finally knew what they were talking about.

I'll never forget the pain of my first kid knee stones...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 34
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What do matadors use to keep their skin moisturized after a bullfight?

Oil of OlΓ©

πŸ‘οΈŽ 31
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/goat_chortle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know you can hear blood flowing close to the skin?

You just have to listen varicosely.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 48
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OriginalCWP
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
For a while I dated a woman who owned a pile of flesh

You know what they say though...

Beauty is only skinned heap

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/incredibleinkpen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 23 2021
🚨︎ report
I just published a book on how to prevent skin injuries and minor burns.

It’s non friction.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my dermatologist why my skin is so itchy a year ago, and he still hasn’t answered me.

I’m starting to think that he doesn’t want to make a rash decision.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lankyjay16
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 119
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gannicusgota
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 15 2021
🚨︎ report
What is the leading cause for dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Electronic-Stable123
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What is the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 406
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know what the leading cause of dry skin is ?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 192
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RedMusical
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report
What's the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/baconlover09
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 28 2021
🚨︎ report
The leading cause of dry skin

A towel.

Got em

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/karenismycat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Day three: what’s the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pizzatron574
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
Can you give someone a skin graft from your butt?

Ass skin for a friend

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know what causes dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thewonkabro
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the leading cause of dry skin ?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 56
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the leading cause of dry skin?

A towel.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/full_of_fud
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘οΈŽ 67
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ping_pong34
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/yyz-ac
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 18 2020
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.