"I'm dung with this shit!"
Clean version I heard as a kid: "I'm dung with this job!"
He is a real Ace of Spades
you: no
me: what, it's groundbreaking!
A ground-breaking discovery
An Ambulance, immediately!
It was a real groundbreaking invention
βSon, I use it because it is a ground-breaking invention.β
That really swept the nation.
(I saw this in a youtube video by Mishkali titled "Attack on Titan Dad Jokes" I'm not sure if she made the joke herself, but credit goes to whoever did.)
An internet trowel.
But everyone was blown away by the leaf blower.
But that didn't solve anything.
Now the neighbours have my shovel and someone still has to pick up the poop in our yard.
The plot thickens
I dig.
It was truly ground-breaking.
He just knew it would be groundbreaking.
By that I mean, you'll need a map and a shovel to find her.
They were truly a ground breaking invention.
Edit: Didn't expect my joke to dig so deep. My inbox is soiled
I had grave concerns
A giant list of puns
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.
I would avoid the sushi if I was you. Itβs a little fishy.
Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind itβs tearable.
Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!
I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.
What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.
How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.
I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.
Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.
I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.
My cat was just sick on the carpet, I donβt think itβs feline well.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.
How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.
What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
Thereβs a new type of broom out, itβs sweeping the nation.
What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.
What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.
Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.
Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.
How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.
The shovel was a ground breaking invention.
A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.
What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.
I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.
What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.
I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.
Towels canβt tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.
Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"
Do you know sign language? You should learn it, itβs pretty handy.
What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.
Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.
A cross eyed teacher couldnβt control his pupils.
After the accident, the juggler didnβt have the balls to do it.
I used to be afraid of hu
... keep reading on reddit β‘It's because it was a ground-breaking invention
The technology in those things are ground breaking.
The shovel.
It was sure groundbreaking!
Itβs ground breaking.
Doug
it was groundbreaking
Doug
What do you call a man without a shovel?
Douglas
Doug
What do you call a man without a shovel?
Douglas
a groundbreaking invention
Doug.
What do you call a man without a shovel?
Douglass.
Doug
the invention of the shovel was truly groundbreaking
It's groundbreaking
the invention of the broom really swept the nation.
A ground breaking invention
