It’s hard to believe that it has been more than 100 years since Einstein published his Theory of Relativity.
It seems like only yesterday.
Guys, make your woman feel special. Place a framed photo of her in the kitchen...
....and write "EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH" on top.
What do you call a joke that has been framed?
Below I will list my two favorite bee related dad-jokes.
What do you call bees that make milk?
Boo-bees
What do you call a beehive with no exit?
Un-bee-leavable
I need pun-related help, please
My girlfriend and I have a dog named Moose. My girlfriend’s father has been coming up with name-related puns recently and I’m being outdone. Reddit, please help. So far, he has come up with:
Moosical
Moosident
All I have:
Moosing persons
I must win this battle of puns.
My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives
I replied, no, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine.
Einstein: Dad, my paper on The Theory of Relativity finally got published!
Einstein’s dad: Damn son, it’s about time.
What do you call a relative who doesn't speak truth?
I have a theory that yeast will one day rule the world
Me and My Friend Making Terrible Bread Related Puns
https://preview.redd.it/ndctm6eopo471.png?width=926&format=png&auto=webp&s=c33a34bd8011d4c7d6cf18afa817f9cb59ad0cef
How is Density related to Massachusetts?
It’s Massachusetts divided by Volumeachusetts.
How is the comedian Gus related to a mushroom?
One of the earlier works of Einstein was a theory of relativity of spices...
does anyone know if a doctor can take some of my butt flesh and graft it onto someone who isn't a relative?
Why doesn't james bond fart in bed?
Because it'll blow his cover
Which of the penguins relatives always gets the most visitors?
My theory on inertia
Has never gained momentum
If Einstein hadn't come up with the Theory of Relativity, someone else would have. It was only a matter of time.
As a huge sports statistics geek, I tend to store all my documents related to high school and collegiate athletes up high.
That way, I can keep a low pro file.
I don’t get why people buy into the flat earth theory.
I mean, the arguments for it aren’t even well rounded.
What country are Ned Flanders’ relatives from?
It's 1905, and Albert Einstein has finally published his new space theory.
(Warning: Morbid dad joke) True Story -- My family were planning my mum's funeral. We always try to keep things light and try to stay positive, just as Mum would have it...
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit--
I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit--
Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
My wife has begged me to stop making police related puns...
I said, "O.K.....I'll give it arrest.
I’ve got a device consisting of a circular canopy of pink fish on a folding metal frame supported by a central rod, used as protection against rain.
Now I have salmonella.
(I’m sorry, it’s a fishy joke)
REQUEST : Need help with a punny (sorry) construction site related safety slogan
I have to make a slogan for safety week at a construction site I work at. Can you guys help?
A small blue garden bird made of mahogany. Be great if I had a related joke...
Holiday to-do list: 1) shoot the family 2) hang the kids 3) frame the wife
$129.95 at JC Penny Portrait and Framing Studio
Need gem related puns
I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place
While waiting for a school-related live stream, me and my friend decided to throw words at each other and make puns out of them. This is one of my most proudest puns.
It’s got a wooden frame, wooden engine, wooden wheels and a wooden gas tank. Did he ride it? No, wooden start
What do you call a sleepy relative?
There was a man who a had an entirely wooden car. Wooden frame, wooden wheels, wooden engine. Did he ride it? No.
looking for plant & clothing/accessories related puns
Blood and Organ related puns please
So a colleague is leaving my work (transfusion medicine lab) to work as an information manager for the organ transplant service. I make cards and I’m trying to think up something punny to write on/in his card and I’ll paint a picture on the front for context. I was thinking like “bloody good luck” or “sorry you’re transplanting”... but less shitty!
Thanks in advance :)
I can’t believe it’s been more than 100 years since Einstein published his Theory of Relativity.
It seems like just yesterday.
I can’t believe it’s been more than a hundred years since Einstein proposed his Theory of Relativity.
It feels like only yesterday.
I finally won an ongoing argument with my wife about Einstein’s Theory of Relativity.
I finally understood Einstein's theory of relativity.
Einstein: Dad, my paper on The Theory of Relativity finally got published!
Dad: Damn son, it’s about time!
I can’t believe it’s been more than a hundred years since Einstein proposed his Theory of Relativity.
It feels like it was only yesterday.
Einstein to his Dad: Dad, my paper on The Theory of Relativity just got published.
Dad: Nice, son. It is about time.
I can’t believe it’s been over a hundred years since Einstein’s Theory of Relativity was published.
It seems like just yesterday.
Does anyone know if it's possible to have a skin graft taken from a buttock to donate to someone who isn't a relative?
Does anyone know if doctors could take some of my butt flesh and graft it onto someone who isn't a relative?
Why did Einstein develop a theory about space?
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