A Car.
Credit will be given to the winner!
The next time you are cooking breakfast for your family and are making biscuits or pancakes or something requiring flour hold the flour up in your hand and yell I have the flour like he man. Plus points if your family gets the reference.
So for reference, I got into the one dorm in my university that somehow doesn't have air conditioning. My dad was talking about the logistics of bringing one or even two fans + an AC unit to keep my room fine. He then says... well at that point you'll have enough fans to start a fan club.
...."insanely witty/hilarious" puns (if you can call them that, I'm not an expert) that he uses when referring to things, here's a few:
- QuikSilver => SlowGold
- Vin Diesel => Lose Petrol
- Backup folder => Frontdown folder
I'll try and think of a few more but you get the point.
Anyways he thinks he's a comedic genius that dude.
My aunt texted my mom "did you hear about the kidnapping at school?" And my mom was talking to us wondering which school my aunt was referring to. Then my aunt responds:
"It's okay, he woke up."
Noooooo. My mom tells my dad what my aunt said and pointed at my mom's foot and then his leg and said "Corn knee."
When our waiter or waitress asks us if we're ready to order, my dad, without fail, responds, "I'm ready like Betty Crocker." At this point most waiters/waitresses don't get the reference because Betty Crocker used to have ads that had the slogan, "Ready when you are, and even when you're not." So some of the times he'll explain it, most of the time he just leaves the waiter/waitress confused.
So I'm out to dinner with my girlfriend and my family. We're waiting by the outdoor bar with a pager for when our table is ready. After a while of waiting, the following happens:
Girlfriend: Who has the... thingy?" (referring to the pager).
Me: "I have a thingy!"
Brother: Chuckles "No, the thingy... The one that vibrates."
Me: "Wait, yours vibrates?!"
My dad and I started laughing pretty hard at this point.
Basically we somehow got on the topic of hipsters and irony. My Dad wanted to make a sort of pun to annoy my sister, because she hates puns.
Now I figure most people would make some sort of reference to an iron "e", and that would be it. But oh no, that's far too simple for him. He says something along the lines of,
"If they're ironic (or defined by irony), doesn't that make them Pharisees?"
So you've got to know that "Ferrous" refers to iron, and then to have some basic knowledge of the New Testament or at least have heard of the Pharisees before. This kind of works on another level because the Pharisees were accused of saying one thing and doing another, which could be said to be ironic to some degree. Of course I've just killed the frog at this point, but I mean if you're ever around some Chemists who have some knowledge of the bible, you might get a slight chuckle, or perhaps even a nod. I'm not really even sure if this qualifies as a Dad joke, but there ya go.
