My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
My two sons 5&8 are playing Minecraft this morning on survival. They are working hard together to build their mansion. I crossed the room in front of the TV to grab my phone as they are balanced high on a wall constructing a roof. My son screams out, “Dad get out of the way!”
I said, “You’re the ones blocking!”
What to do when phone dropped in water
I just dropped my phone in the bath
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
I swear I was born in the wrong generation. Nowadays everyone is addicted to their phones.
I wish I was born in the 80's when everyone was addicted to Cocaine.
Why did the pirate get in his ship and leave immediately when he got a phone call?
I use Ironman sounds in my phones event calander for important stuff.
Wife: I’m not in the mood to do my homework. Me: Just phone it in and do C-work. Wife: I don’t know how to do C-Work.
Me: step 1, buy a boat.
Just happened. Not an official dad yet but she’s 6 months pregnant. Got to get the practice in while I can.
Why can’t you make a phone call in China?
There’s so many Wings and Wong’s, you might wing the wong number.
Wife (we both live in the US): I have to make sure my work phone is on do not disturb mode before bed so I don’t get email notifications from co-workers in our office in Europe.
Me: Sure, because when they send email, they don’t care if you’re up.
I tried everything but I couldn't get my phone to sync with my computer, so I threw it in the toilet.
Do they use cell phones in prison?
Me: <receives phone notification> "Ooh, it's supposed to start raining in 2 minutes"
Wife: "It's sunny outside"
Me: <continuing> "...the rain will be light."
Trump has just issued Boris Johnson a final warning about allowing Chinese technology in their phone system
He told him "it's my way or the Huawei"
I put my phone under my pillow last night and went to sleep. When I woke up it was gone and a pound coin was in its place
Damn that Bluetooth Fairy
I tried using a powerbank on my phone, but the police threw it in jail...
It was charged with battery.
I accidentally dropped my phone in the bath yesterday. Some water got stuck in between the phone and it’s cover. I thought my phone was waterproof.
But apparently not in this case.
I was in the supermarket when I got a message on my phone telling me there were 24 singles in my area,
Think I'm going to delete the Kraft Cheese app.
I can easily buy a Xiaomi phone in Asia
My Dad dropped his phone in a cup of coffee...
After a stunned silence...
"At least it runs Java now."
I almost answered the phone when my talkative German brother-in-law was calling me, but thankfully I recognized the number.
Dad got his first smart phone. I asked him if he knew to put it in rice if it got wet...
Him: Yeah and if that doesn't work, you put butter on it
Me: Butter?? Really? I hadn't heard that one. Why butter?
Him: Because if the rice doesn't work the phone is toast
Met a guy today who could tear a phone book in half.
I dropped my phone in the toilet...
Everyone says I sound like crap now
Can’t wait to get home and plug in my phone.
I don't have tags for my dog, but I bought her a phone in case she got lost. She ran away today.
My wife always put some cash in her phone cover,
My son saw some sneakers hanging from the phone lines in the street...
... he asked me "Hey dad, how did those shoes get up there?". I sombrely explained to my son that sometimes, when shoes die and they ascend to heaven, the laces get caught up and they get stuck like that.
My Son: "Dad! Shoe's don't go to heaven!", Me: "Of course they do! They've got soles don't they!?"
One of my friends just told me how they broke their phone even though it was in a shock absorbing case.
It was quite a break thru. A shocking discovery.
What do you call an I-Phone in a blender?
What do a dog and a phone have in common?
They both have a collar ID
What do they call phone sex in the Navy?
Why don’t cell phones work in a cemetery?
After being warned to protect my new phone, I finally got my protection in the mail today. They sent me one meant for a teen girl with bieber on it. I still will use it until i can replace it to protect my phone.
Just in: Case; Justin case. Just Encase, just in case.
The phone in my new room doesn't have hands-free
At my work we sell internet and work with credit card info so we aren't allowed to bring mobil phones in.
So I turned to my manager yesterday and said
"We may not be able to have cell phones, but we can have SALE phones."
Note: This my first post here and not 100% sure if this is a dad joke. If it doesn't belong here, do inform me where I could post it. Many thanks!
I tried to tear a phone book in half but I couldn't.
There really is strength in numbers.
(This was actually a mom joke directed at the dad trying unsuccessfully to tear a small phone book)
I dropped my phone in mayonnaise today,
Why aren't phones allowed in jail or prison?
I mean, they are called cell phones.
Can you imagine what would happen if a phone exploded in a VR headset?
My wife was madly tapping at her phone, looks up in frustration, and says "My sound isn't working".
To which I reply "I can hear you just fine".
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
I dropped my phone in the lake...
My son just walked in and asked me to call his phone.
I called "JAKE'S PHONE!!"
I dropped my phone in the bathtub.
I was in the supermarket when I got a message on my phone telling me there were 24 singles in my area.
Think I'm going to delete the Kraft Cheese app.
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