What do Stage Magicians and Confused Navigators have in common?

Misdirections.

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📅︎ Nov 10 2019
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Why did the Navigator get fired as a teacher?

He kept getting lost at "C"

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📅︎ Jun 06 2019
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Why was the navigator fired?

He had a bad latitude.

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👤︎ u/mkaic
📅︎ Jan 18 2018
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What did the novice navigator say as he located his first landmark?

I think I'm getting somewhere

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👤︎ u/Norskey
📅︎ Dec 18 2013
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I've been using my new U2 navigation system this week and it's the worst...

The streets have no name and I still haven't found what I'm looking for!

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👤︎ u/VAOkie
📅︎ Jan 17 2021
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I did my navigation task and it lead me straight to you...❤️❤️❤️
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📅︎ Oct 31 2020
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Upon seeing a gorgeous girl at the party, I knew I had to meet her. So I approached and told her about a special-purpose ship designed to move and navigate through frozen waters, and provide safe waterways for other boats and ships.

I've used it before and it works. It's the perfect icebreaker.

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📅︎ Oct 29 2020
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My satellite navigation told me to turn around....

Now I can't see where I'm going.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Nov 01 2020
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So in my country there is an app that helps navigate through cemeteries

That will help to avert many grave mistakes

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📅︎ Aug 08 2020
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I'm currently reading a book about the life of Henry Ford.

It's an autobiography.

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📅︎ Jan 15 2021
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I remarried, and my new wife is pissed because of my poor navigation skills

She said our relationship wasn't going anywhere

Edit : She just packed her bag and right

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📅︎ Aug 27 2020
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A cat that is naturally good at navigating kitchen surfaces is counter intuitive.
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👤︎ u/Bargeral
📅︎ Feb 06 2020
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What did the Mandalorian say to his friend while showing him a gps navigation app?

"This is the Waze."

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📅︎ Jun 22 2020
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What do you call an alligator with a compass?

A Navigator

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📅︎ Sep 12 2020
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Why do dog make great navigation markers?

Because they are all good buoys.

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👤︎ u/AndreT_NY
📅︎ Jul 24 2019
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I was skiing on the ocean and ran into a navigational marker. Buoy did it hurt!
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📅︎ Dec 08 2018
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Why did the explorer get lost when navigating with a compass?

He was bipolar

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👤︎ u/airhogg
📅︎ Feb 13 2019
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What do you call a alligator equipped with gps?

A Navigator

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👤︎ u/j0hnk50
📅︎ Jul 15 2020
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My first job was on a ship, I was assigned to look for navigational markers. I was a Buoy Scout.
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📅︎ Dec 08 2018
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I had a Bonnie Tyler Satellite Navigation Sytem once..

Was rubbish, kept telling me to turn around and every now and then it fell apart

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👤︎ u/priv_rex
📅︎ Jun 06 2018
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What happens to an alligator when it gets a gps?

it becomes a... hehe... a NAVIGATOR HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHA

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📅︎ Jun 11 2020
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Why were there so many road accidents in the Roman Empire?

Everyone had a hard time navigating those sharp V-turns.

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📅︎ Jun 30 2020
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How do young girl scouts navigate from place to place?

Brownian motion.

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📅︎ Oct 05 2017
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Riding in the car with my friend. Since I'm navigating, she asks me if she's in the right lane.

Me: "No, you're in the left lane." Her: side eye

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📅︎ Nov 22 2015
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GPS navigation dadjoke

I'm not a dad yet but my wife and I are in the process of trying. To get ready for fatherhood I hit her with this one every time we are coming up to a right turn and the car navigation says "please turn right now."

"okay, but which way!?"

it's good for a groan every time!

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👤︎ u/zlhill
📅︎ Mar 07 2015
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I was walking across a lake and suddenly a gator appeard and started guiding me

It was a Navigator

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📅︎ Jan 31 2019
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What kind of alligator gives the best directions?

A navigator

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👤︎ u/dadjokes4u
📅︎ Jan 13 2018
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Who do you ask for help when your lost in a swamp?

A naviGATOR

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📅︎ Feb 15 2019
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Every year, a local farmer cuts certain parts of his corn crop before harvest for the entertainment of many who like to get lost.

They do their best to navigate that maize.

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📅︎ Oct 13 2019
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A classic family Florida vacation...

"She's a navigator, not a get lost for a while crocodile!" Said after my parents were shocked my brother and his new wife where heading in the right direction to the beach.

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📅︎ Jun 30 2018
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Got my girlfriend in the car

She was the navigator on this road trip Gf: theres an intersection where you need to bear left. Me: shouldnt i go right to avoid the bear?

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📅︎ Jan 22 2016
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My FIL when leaving the house with MIL, "You drive and I'll nag"

He then looks at me and says "marital navigation, Nagigation".

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📅︎ May 29 2016
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GPS...

Navigation system; 'Bare left after 300 yards'

Dad; Oh my God take cover, there's a massive grizzly bear on the left!'

We were in Central London.

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👤︎ u/nott96
📅︎ Jun 06 2015
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Today, driving in the car...

...we were lost until my mom found the directions to the place on her phone. She began to brag about her amazing sense of navigation when my dad replied "Yes, you're just Miss Direction."

Bonus joke, Tom Petty was playing and my dad wondered if he ever cared about anything important.

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👤︎ u/wjw42
📅︎ Jan 27 2014
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why was the navigator fired?

because he lost the plot

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👤︎ u/adc2502
📅︎ Aug 27 2019
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What do you call an alligator with a GPS?

A navigator

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👤︎ u/lilahmer
📅︎ Dec 09 2017
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