Qualquer um que estÑ na internet provavelmente jÑ teve contato com essas teorias da conspiração malucas, uma das mais antigas é a do Mondex. Supostamente é uma empresa da MasterCard que desenvolveu um biochip que jÑ é/ serÑ obrigatório ser implantado na mão de todo mundo.
Em 2013 lembro que confrontei um pastor evangΓ©lico que acreditava nessas maluquices e ele publicou um texto falando que esse chip seria obrigatΓ³rio a partir de 2014. Como jΓ‘ morei na Europa e ainda tinha contato com amigos na Europa, obviamente usei isso como argumento pra mostrar que era mentira. Mais ainda, mostrei a ele texto mais antigos que falavam que o tal chip seria obrigatΓ³rio a partir de 2013. O tempo passou, novamente reciclaram esse texto falando que o chip seria obrigatΓ³rio a partir de 2015. E jΓ‘ estamos em 2018, o tal do Mondex ainda nΓ£o Γ© obrigatΓ³rio e esse povo continua acreditando nessas besteiras.
Eu me impressiono com a capacidade que algumas pessoas tΓͺm de serem refutados pela prΓ³pria realidade e continuarem acreditando nesse monte de besteira.
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
BudΕΌet jakieΕ 50zΕ, jakby byΕ jakiΕ niesamowity to 70zΕ. JeΕli mΕynek do wszystkiego to kiepski pomysΕ to mogΔ byΔ dwa osobne. Kompletnie siΔ nie znam i nie chcΔ kupiΔ bubla.
Do your worst!
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies π
It really does, I swear!
My Cloud peacefully sleeping after his third round of water and Mondex solution. Coffee for helping me perk up while watching over him. My mama for the pancake. My papa for watching out for Nimbus.
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
BamBOO!
Theyβre on standbi
A play on words.
My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.
Pilot on me!!
Christopher Walken
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Or would that be too forward thinking?
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
When I got home, they were still there.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
I won't be doing that today!
Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
Where ever you left it π€·ββοΈπ€
There hasn't been a post all year!
[Removed]
You take away their little brooms
It was about a weak back.
