4 Hilarious Membership Card Puns

Friend: ...my wife is uncomfortable with them because they’ve joined the church of Satan. Like, he showed me his membership card. They’re paid members, man.

Me: well; someone has to pay the devil’s dues

Friend: damn it.

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👤︎ u/Jubaliya

📅︎ Oct 21 2020

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Bicycle tire Dad Joke fail - where do I turn in my membership card?

At work, I had to take off and re-seat the tire on the front wheel of my bicycle. I took the wheel up to my cube to do it. As I was taking it, I passed someone in the stairwell. My dad joke was, “I’m tired.”

LAME!! Should’ve said “I’m retiring. Wish me luck!”

Shameful.

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👤︎ u/tasunder

📅︎ Apr 08 2019

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A store's membership card is called Inspire

Everytime the cashier asks if I have one I reply that it expired!

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👤︎ u/Atothinath

📅︎ Nov 24 2017

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Working at Hannaford Supermarket, a customer asked if I wanted her "number"

I said, "Lady, we just met!"

Luckily, she had a great sense of humor. She was referring to, of course, a phone number for a rewards member look-up, but Hannaford Supermarkets does not have a membership card anymore; it was too easy, I had to tease her!

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👤︎ u/jdheath

📅︎ Jul 09 2014

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