My brother was obsessed with the Enterprise, Kurt, Spock, Scotty, Lt. Uhura and Dr. McCoy but hated the Next Generation and all the others.

He had a one Trek Mind.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
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What happened when the Lt. General had diarrhoea?

He became a loo-tenant...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vishal_rjagan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2018
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Finally got one that I remembered to post! LT/FT

GF: "I went shopping for bras (again). I think I have an addiction."

Me: "So...does that mean that you need to join a SUPPORT group?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FuriousRod
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2015
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"Everywhere I look something reminds me of her" -Lt. Frank Drebin, Dadjoke King imgur.com/ScUcPTv
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πŸ‘€︎ u/twentysomethinger
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2013
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They're releasing a sequel to the popular documentary 'March of the Penguins'.

It's going to be called 'April of the Penguins'.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/levymealone
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2016
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A Punny Story

A director and a costume designer had a disagreement over a critical shot in the horror movie they were filming in their studio.

The director planned to use CGl for a brief but critical reveal-shot of the movie's monster. But the costume designer insisted they use an actual costume instead of CGl.

"CGl makes a movie look cheap these days," she proclaimed.

The two of them continued debating until they began arguing. The stage crew, actors on break, and other people around them began watching until both the costume designer and director were shouting over each other at the top of their lungs. Despite their efforts, nobody could calm them down.

Fearing the incident may lead to blows, one of cameramen called a studio security guard in urgent request. The guard arrived a minute later and made a beeline for the director and costume designer, who were being held back by multiple people on set.

"lt's my movie. l make the decisions!" the director hollered, hoarse and red in the eyes.

"The movie quality will suffer!" the costume designer screamed, hair plastered across her sweaty face.

The security guard stepped in-between them and raised his pistol at the ceiling without a word. They continued to argue around him. There was a bark of gunshot, then nothing but silence and some falling plaster.

"Now see here," the guard said loudly, stepping back to look at the two of them. "Either you two quit your bickering or l'll have to escort you off the premises. You're making a scene."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BaronVA
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2017
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I got my wife with this in the grocery store: Her: Do you like kalamatas or castelvetranos?

Me: I don't know, I like olive them. Her: <sighs and takes the cart further down the aisle>

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Skot_Skot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2016
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