I used light beams to eradicate a common herb...

It was rays against thyme.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/gone4011s
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 21 2017
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The best way to get dad joked:

I know it's been done before, and many a dad before me and many a dad after me will get to experience this, but in these dark times this was a ray of light that pierced me right to the core with joy.

I came home, and my bright and bubbly ballerina 6 year old runs up and says can I have a hug!?

She asks very tentatively because she knows I have been out all day and the routine is for me to grab a shower (COVID) before I let them get all over me.

So I say, not yet I'm dirty.

She says awww... then she turns to walk away, but then spins back around and looks at me dead in the eye and says:

Hi! um...

wait a sec,

um, I know um,

um, wait.... dir...

[Face beams the biggest smile of accomplishment]

Hi Dirty! I'm [daughter]!

I know we have those proud moments when they turn, but man her delivery, the awkwardness, and the sheer pride she beamed out when she realized she just pulled the reverse dad joke on me...

It's not the getting reverse dad'd, it's the joy and pride she had... she could have just graduated college, and that's how big her beaming smile was right then...

It's a memory I am going to keep and it really lit up this dark time.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 52
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/leyline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
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Two guys at the funny farm

Two guys at the funny farm. One guy says, โ€œWe can get out of here.โ€

The other guy says, โ€œWe can?โ€

He says, โ€œYes.โ€

The other guy says, โ€œHow?โ€

The first guy says, โ€œIโ€™ve got a big flashlight. Tonight weโ€™ll come out to the wall, Iโ€™ll throw the light up against the wall, and you climb up the beam.โ€

The guy says, โ€œYou really think Iโ€™m nuts, donโ€™t you? I know what youโ€™d do! Iโ€™d get halfway up, youโ€™d shut it off!โ€

(Editorโ€™s note: Batman fans will recognize this as the final joke in The Killing Joke).

http://red-skelton.info/articles/jokes/two-guys-at-the-funny-farm/

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/tfraymond
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
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I'm moving away to university on an unusually sunny morning, and Dad is driving me.

The light is beaming into my eyes. "Woah, it's so bright..", I remark.

"It's the future!"

"... What, Dad?"

"It's the future, Ermen, it's so bright!"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Ermen
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 24 2014
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