When Columbus discovered America and met Indigenous people,
So what if I'm not part of a culturally similar indigenous peoples inhabiting the Arctic regions of Greenland, Canada and Alaska that speaks a language that is part of the Eskimo–Aleut family.
I could try harder to be, but I guess I'm just not Inuit.
There are only two white people in the movie Black Panther
Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.
They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.
I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.
The amount of people who confuse "to" and "too"
There are two types of people in the world.
Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
There are 10 types of people in the world:
Those who know binary and those who don't.
Bet Jay Z loves a 99. (Rest of world buddies, a 99 is the name of the best UK ice cream, not what you're thinking). (UK people, it is the best)
A lot of people will be enjoying their day off on the 4th of July
But not fire. fire WORKS on the 4th of July
Did you know that Muslims were the LOWEST impacted religious group of people in the pandemic?
They've always required mosques
People say biker gangs, mafia groups, and billionaires run this country. Wrong. It's the head of the dairy lobby.
TIL about the number one cause of divorce in America.
Some people were arguing about the most important part of a kitchen.
"The sink is the most important! It's where you get water for cooking, wash your hands, clean fruits and vegetables, and clean the dishes up afterwards."
But another person said,
"The countertop is even more important. It's where the food is prepared. And if the counter weren't there, you wouldn't have a sink at all!"
The first person was shocked. They weren't expecting a counterargument.
Most people think that the T-Rex is incapable of clapping because they have short arms.
But really it's because they're dead.
A lot of people can’t tell the difference between entomology and etymology.
I can’t find the words for how much this bugs me.
People who don’t know the difference between entomology and etymology…
Bug me in ways I cannot put into words.
People in Dubai don’t like The Flintstones.
But people in Abu Dhabi do.
The people of Germany were sure that Hitler would be a heroic leader in 1933.
They were wrong, as he didn't have the balls they were expecting.
What is the smartest state in America?
Alabama. It has four A’s and one B.
Jesus said he would get rid of wicked people. Odin said he would get rid of ice giants.
I don't see any ice giants around.
People often ask me why I am willing to build barriers preventing the flow of water for anyone who asks...
I tell them it's because I give a dam.
Did you know that some people set things on fire just because they enjoy the smell of them burning?
What do you call a group of deaf people?
I don't know. But it is definitely not herd.
A lot of people say the me and my older brother look alike
I agree because I have his jeans
I wrote down the names of all the people I hate on a piece of paper, but my roommate used it roll up a joint.
Now he’s high on the list of people I never want to talk to again.
These days not a lot of people are named Lance.
But in Medieval times people were named Lancelot.
What would the movie have been called if Captain America was a dachshund?
Captain America - The Weiner Soldier
People say that money is not the key to happiness...
But I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.
I received an email where someone made some comments about a group of people called Mark. The subject? ...
In a recent poll, 80% of people in America said they would not open their homes to a sentient water basin that walked up to their door and asked for shelter.
What’s the difference between 2016-2020 America and a set of braces?
There is none, they both promote being white and straight
People were creeped out by the backwards version of Fur Elise coming out of Beethoven's grave
Turns out he was just decomposing.
People who don't know the difference between the words burro and burrow
don't know their ass from a hole in the ground
The salesman at the furniture store told me, “This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems".
I said, “Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
To the people who don't take the fear of clowns seriously...
Coulrophobia is no laughing matter.
79% of people don't know opposite words for the following.
- Always
- Coming
- From
- Take
- Me
- Down
Some people think that being a waiter is a bad job or the result of poor choices...
but hey, at least I put food on the table...
Two drunk guys were about to get into a brawl. One of the guys grabs a stick and draws a line in the dirt and says "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face"
Grandma is always saying to me ' Hey what's the name of that German guy again who keeps taking my stuff '
Alzheimer, Grandma, it's Alzheimer.
Did you know a colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence?
For example
- I ate my friend's lunch
- I ate my friend's colon
There are 10 kinds of people in this world:
Those who understand binary and those who don’t
What do cannibals serve at the beginning of dinner party?
you know what drives old people up the wall?
There are two kinds of people in the world...
- Those who can extrapolate from known data...
In a recent poll, 80% of people in America said they would not open their homes to a sentient water basin that walked up to their door and asked for shelter…
The salesman at the furniture store told me, “This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems".
I said, “Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
There are two types of people in this world.
Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
There are 10 types of people who understand binary...
Those who do and those who don't.
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