Ideational Puns

nt, basically. I can grok the rest of the document but I'm not clear on that particular phrase means. For more context

"He employs an ideational approach to decision making and has a maladaptively strong preference for dealing with experience, primarily through ideational channels."

I'm working on a short philosophy paper discussing John Locke's ideational theory of meaning, and as part of the prompt I'm asked to reference Berkeley's objection that uses a hectogon (100-sided shape). I remember the gist of the argument from lecture (I believe it has to do with the fact that we imagine a 100-sided shape in the same way we would a circle, so it seems to be a problem that two different words have the same idea without sharing the same meaning) but cannot find any information online that references this example. I was hoping to quote the original objection or at least find something to verify that I have the argument right.

Does anyone happen to know this particular objection that could help me make sure I understand it?

scared of where i’ll end up if I mention the ideations

In theory, the idea and concept is great. You have a scav disguised as a Santa that runs around and gives loot to the friendly players.
This is also a test to see how players would react to a vendor being installed in the lighthouse area (in the new map). As they told us before, the area I just mentioned will be home to 4 bosses proctecting the vendor.
So on paper, the Santa Claus system works.

Now in practice Lots of things went wrong and I don't believe its because BSG is lazy, I think its simply because they are overwhelmed with the development and might have rushed things a bit.
Scav Santa was essentially a way to see if having a neutral npc in the map would be possible and also observe player behavior towards it.

Here are somethings that personally I believe went wrong.

• The appearance:
  Santa Claus is dressed in red, with a beard a hat and a big red pilgrim.
  The problem with this is that there are lots of dark environments within tarkov, making it hard to see. A simple solution could have been to add three distinctive ways to identify him.

1. Voice lines : ho ho ho. 2) Christmas lights wrapped around his bag/chest. 3) Jinglebells"

• The behavior of Santa:
  Santa Claus rushes towards the players, as a neutral NPC he should actually be positionned at a convenient store or location that the player knows he will be there.
  Furthermore, during the fights, Santa Claus is unaware of its surrounding and will follow its normal behavior, rushing at players to give them gifts.

• The locations:
  Santa should have been placed in a very specific location on each map. A spot near the tree, with christmas music or what not and stay there. Santa could shoot at you if you shoot the scavs around the tree but would not pursue the player and reset his aggro and go back to his original neutral state afterwards.
  This would have made the NPC way easier to identify and more importantly than ever, players know where the NPC is located and this would diminish the amount of Accidental kills.

• The Addition of a karma penality:
  I do get the reasoning behind this, if players shoot Santa, they are naughty and will lose Scav Karma.
  Just like a player would lose ''X rep'' if he shot a vendor (Neutral NPC) or any other near/long future Added NPC.

The problem here really stems from the three previously mentioned points, players lost TONS of karma because of poor implementation. Hear me out BSG, I'm not all torches and forks, i'm

Pretty much the title. Every year after the holidays I get a mini surge of people considering detransition or who present with new onset depression and suicidal ideation.

The reason is obvious, people go home to their family, people who should love them unconditionally and it doesn't go so well.

I work really really hard to make sure I don't ever lose patients to suicide. In nine years it's only happened once, and I was completely shocked by that one. It sort of came out of nowhere. Not a day goes by that I don't think about that person and wonder if I'd been a little friendlier in my last portal message with them, if I'd probed a little harder they would have confided in me and I could have done something.

I'll never know how many people I yanked back to reality when they were standing on the edge of the void, but I always think about the one I didn't.

I can't see all trans people on earth, so do me a solid and check in on your trans friends/family/etc and make sure they are doing alright and aren't in a dark place.

I rather openly admit that were it not for a random Facebook message from one of my trans patients a few months after the fire, I would currently not exist. Because of what she said to me, PFM now exists and I still do as well. It really can make a difference, so take a second and send some messages to everyone you care about. It you are not sure what to say, just send something like this:

"Hey, haven't heard much from you for a little while are you doing okay? For real, asking for an honest response, as I care about you"

I credit my life to that patient that did it for me, so I try to pay it forward.

First of all, why are you writing that on Reddit? Do you want the FBI to come knocking? Second of all, you're going to be banned and reported to the higher powers that be.

If you take the time to make multiple accounts on here trying to troll and pretend u have bpd to post this stuff… go touch grass please and thank u

Do not share your plans to commit arson, homicide, violence, mass shootings, or any of that shit. It's weird. And scary. Seek professional help. We will use the proper channels to have your account and/or IP banned from Reddit as a whole.

to our wonderful, good faith users/community, this is in no way directed towards you.

Throwaway because I know several people IRL who visit this sub and might recognize this. I dont want to dox my personal. Obligatory long time lurker. New user. Please do not use my story. It is mine. I'm on mobile.

TW suicidal ideation threated by MIL. Part one. We have spent an entire year dealing with MIL. I'm exhausted. From her constant 2-3 day spirals. Her manipulations, guilt trips. Flying monkeys. SO finally started coming out of the FOG 6 months ago and has gotten a Shiney spine. But he is VERY non confrontational so this is taking it's toll on him.

So JNMIl has not always been a JN. we have always seen her in conflicts with people. She is always the victim even though in some incidents she is very much not.

Last year, she started drama between me and my JNSIL. She sent a major guilt trip about how I should unblock her. Then accused us of lying over covid. 2-3 times send raging texts since we did not respond within the hour (we were at work), her texts could wait. She told BIL we were mad at her and had him contact us in one of those "we didn't text right away". When confronted she said she "didn't know if we were safe". Why not call? Come over?

Then accused us of lying and having COVID. Then hiding it from her. We of course did not. Then in that message when SO is suggesting she talk to her therapist (that she recently started seeing because of conflict with siblings but had quit after 4-5 sessions because it "wasn't helping"). Then the next day throws a spiraling "poor me/guilt text " to us and BIL/SIL because she "told us she was sick and no one checked on her". In reality my SO asked her when she accused us of lying if she was feeling okay and she said she didn't feel like herself.

All this happened in a 25 day span. On the 20th of January 2021 she sent SO and I several messages thanking us for being her kids. Praises. Then turned around and put us in a group with BIL/SIL did the same thing then said it's her time to go she is praying God takes her home tonight. So me and SIL show up to her house. I call MIL friend. Husband shows up a bit after me.

JNMIL point blank says that is is feeling this way because we are ignoring her, cutting her out of our lives, not speaking to her. That she hears from BIL/SIL all the time. We defend and give her dates. In the 25 day span she was referring to she heard from us via text (some days in depth) for 23 out of 25 days. I also had 7 phone calls. And she saw us at least 2 times. Then after she coul

I have been suffering from OCD for as long as i can remember. It made my life in to a dead end trainwreck. Naturally thoughts of ending my life were a usual part of my daily routine.

Having found an awesome therapist, with her help, i realized, what i want is not to die, but to actually live for once. To be finally happy, and content. However, the suicidal (nut sure if just intrusive?) thoughts continued.

I found that strange because i made a huge ass realization, yet here i am, finger gunning myself though my lower jaw dozens of times a day thinking "i just wanna die." Thing is, we established that i do not want to. Why does my subconscious fuck with me still?

Then it dawned on me. Death is the end of life, and my current situation is masquarading as life. Which it is not. Consciously, i desire the end of my current situation, but my subconscious still thinks of my current existence as life, hence the suicidal thoughts!

As someone who has chronic suicidal ideation, going on, 25 years roughly (which does not mean I want to or plan to ever do it) and as a gun owner, I would really like to give my personal perspective if possible. Maybe help give some insight on what it's like. I did my best trying to articulate, I am no writer. Suicide is an issue that can affect anyone and there are rarely glaring signs until after unfortunately. As a community who uses something that can take lives, try to pay as close attention to your shooting buddies as you can. Educate yourself on some of the signs, you could literally save a life.

Trigger warning, In this post, I go into detail about my experience with suicidal ideation. This is about my ideation, it can be something completely different to what others experience. Please contact me if you need to. If you just need help finding the right resources or have questions you want to ask, I promise I will respond. There are always resources to help. Please visit the site at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ If you need help.

here is an article to the statistics used.  https://health.ucdavis.edu/what-you-can-do/facts.html

I really dislike it when these specific statistics are used as a point because it makes it easy to focus anywhere but on the problem. If you remove all guns from the world, you still have a suicide problem. The means in which people do it shouldn't be the focus; the reason they do it and finding a solution to help should be the focus. It does the issue a disservice when you blame the means in which it's carried out.

Trust me, the lack of available mental health resources if/when you seek help for suicidal ideation is something I don't think people realize is as big of an issue as it is. Many therapists will turn you away the instant you mention it, and even fewer have the tools to help you. Which means your best solution if you do seek help after being turned away is to self admission into care yourself. And that goes against your nature. It takes a lot to take that step, one I never could. I was lucky. I kept trying to find someone to help. It took around 8 or 9 therapists to find someone who was comfortable taking me on as a client.

The problem is that we cannot or do not typically seek help until it is already unmanageable. It doesn't always pop into your head one day because something traumatic happened. There are different ways ideation can manifest. Don't discredit what you're experiencing ju

Update: I appreciate everyone’s responses so much. I didn’t expect this to get so many responses. Everyone’s responses have been incredibly warm and reassuring. I feel so much more at peace now and am wishing you all the kind energy you’ve given this post.

Hopefully not too much information but I’m also on my time of the month, which exacerbates my depression and anxiety, so tonight is a rough night. I know the night will pass and my time of the month with pass and therefore that’ll ease the heaviness of this fear on my shoulders, but it will still be lurking. I don’t want to feel this way forever. Battling urges to end my life or to just stay in bed all day has been exhausting. Trying to do schoolwork while dealing with invasive thoughts of self-hatred has been exhausting. Crying over how awful our world can be has been exhausting. Feeling useless because I don’t have the motivation to do anything worthwhile has been exhausting. I am tired. I don’t want to die but I don’t want to be alive.

I’m scared I’ll be like this forever. I’m on meds but they can only do so much. Therapy can only do so much. I just want to curl up next to a warm heater and fall into a neverending sleep so that I don’t have to deal with this.

How do you know the difference?

It's the last step before suicide but feels not miles but light years away, until it's not. How do you know how close you are? I just imagined my mother's reaction to it and it brought me to tears when I rarely cry. But while I don't "feel" as depressed as I have in the past, I feel strangely closer than ever to ending it.

I’m new and a huge fan of open source. Is there a place where people talk about open source ideas?

Before I start a little trigger warning this may be dark to some, not to bad but I just thought I'd through this in here:

I'll cut a long story short. I'm depressed, very socially anxious and have been for a long time. I've come to accept it to some degree that this is part of my character and I have to try and live with it, but I cannot stop thinking about suicide which is making doing that very difficult. In my country therapy has a very long waiting list so I can't talk to a therapist at the moment.

I can't stop thinking about suicide, I genuinely have a hatred for myself and for life itself and I want to end it, but i never will because i don't have it in me and i know that, the balls of steel it takes to willingly step into the void is something i dont possess. I need to find a way to get this out of my head as it's getting in the way of my life, I just cant get on with things as I keep thinking about killing myself and it's becoming an issue, again I won't do it.

I typically don't care about anything and anything I find motivation for I often end up resenting, then I think it's never going to change so I should end it... but I wont, I keep cutting myself short of potential because of this thought process.

Any tips/advice?

So, here I am—Forty-four days, six hours and forty-four minutes sober.

This is what I could be saying right now if I hadn't slipped up today around noon when a lack of self-control and a selfish, self-gratifying, and thoughtless impulse took over. And I say that in the kindest, and most understanding, way to myself. My mind spiralled, my thoughts became fixated, and my feet began to move almost as if they were controlled by something beyond myself. I made my way to the local liquor store and fucked up.

A half-dozen beer in my arms, I walked home; I could have tossed it, could have poured it out, could have run away, but my mind was fixated on the "What if?" What if it is different? What if you feel good? What if this makes you fulfilled? Loved? Confident? Proud of yourself? What if this makes your father say he's proud of you? Makes your mother much less stressed about her cancer?

What if? What if? The if never comes, and I can honestly say that the If that "What if I got sober?" or "What if I got my shit together?" is much better than the "What if?" of the nonsense that alcohol provides.

Day One, here I am. I am yours, and I'm not going back.

TL;DR I am struggling with parenthood with my C-PTSD diagnosis. High-needs child. History and rant follows.

Until the age of 25 I never, ever wanted to have children. I knew my parents had horribly traumatized and neglected me and I didn’t have the skills to parent.

Then I accidentally got pregnant and had a traumatic, painful abortion. After that, my body wanted to be pregnant but I kept fighting with logic, telling myself I shouldn’t have kids.

Anyways I got in a relationship at 27 with a long term FWB who told me he wanted to have children with me. He promised stability & love and like an idiot I ignored any red flags and quickly became pregnant. We both wanted this child very much and made plans together with his family and it was such a joyful time.

Of course it all fell apart and I witnessed my partner hurting our 1 month old baby. I did all the right things— called the police and got custody and a restraining order. I moved with our baby across the country with no help from my family and the ire and abuse from the father’s family.

I was horribly traumatized and suicidal but knew I had to stay for my (AFAB diagnosed w gender dysphoria age 5) son. I sought professional help with a therapist and got on medication. Finally I was diagnosed with C-PTSD and MDD. Things would get better for periods of time, but the meds would stop working after 6 months or so and I’d have to switch. I got on disability when my son was 5 because symptoms were so severe I couldn’t work.

Now my son is 7 and was recently diagnosed with ADHD and ODD on top of being trans. He triggers me ALL THE TIME, every single day. Wants to fight and argue about anything and everything. Says cruel things, hits/kicks to hurt me or destroys my belongings when I take away TV/toys as a consequence. He is so much like his father (who he has never talked to or seen since 1 month old) that it makes me want to die. I am drowning in shame for picking his father, for choosing to get pregnant, and failing my child in whatever way has made him like this. Feels like 100% My Fault His Life Is Shit™️

I have been suffering the last 3 months waiting for a med change appointment, so my depression is absolutely out of control. For the first time in 10 years I have returned to self harm at a new level of violence. I wake up every day wanting to die and debating with myself how to provide a stable, safe future for my son …so I can go kill myself. Can’t send him to family or friends, won’t send him

It's like a constant drum beat for me. It drones on and on throughout most of my days.

I know depression is pretty high in the gay community. If you deal with this, how do you cope? What do you do to feel better in the moment?

On one hand, I'm happier than I've ever been. I accept myself for the first time. But I think about suicide almost daily, and on mornings like this, I wake up with the sole desire of doing it. "Do it" or "kill yourself" repeats in my head over and over.

I just spent like 45 minutes crying in the bathroom because I was so overwhelmed at my brain. It’s 2 am and I think my roomie who is home is asleep. There’s too many different things going on. I have to rehome my foster cat of 7 months in the next 2 weeks. I’m living with a roomie who we both liked each other but they set boundaries so now we practically avoid each other and it’s just hard not to think about and let it bother me. I just feel so worthless and puny and terrible. I feel so ugly. I’m sorry to be so blunt but I’m just letting out my sad inner voice right now. I’m so sad and depressed. I feel like nothing will be ok once I don’t have my cat. He’s my life but I don’t have the personal capacity to take care of him. Also I’m considering starting to take data analysis courses and do a grad degree because this psychology undergrad degree I’m finishing seems kinda worthless. But I’m overwhelmed at the prospect of working 9-5 and becoming an unhappy cog in the machine of capitalism, I never ever wanted to do that. I only recently thought it would be important since my business is not stable and I can’t afford my own health insurance which I’ll need for my chronic condition once I turn 26. Im 23 now. I’m just feel so sad, worthless, and overwhelmed. I had ideation for the first time in a while that intensely in the bathroom. My whole body was shaking and I couldn’t stop crying loudly. I think it was a meltdown. Then I was rocking my body. I didn’t make plans and I don’t but more just “I don’t wanna be here anymore” saying it out loud. I just don’t wanna sell my life but things feels so impossible in this dystopian world.

I was listening to an old episode of the pod the other day when somehow Dasha brought up that she was glad she didn't kill herself when she was younger, because things have picked up and gotten better.

She then goes on to explain how when she was in Thailand and at other times in her life she would think about killing herself, but didn't go through with it for some reason. If she had killed herself, we wouldn't have 75% of the pod, Wobble Palace, Softness of Bodies, or anything else that she's gone on to do which I've really enjoyed. I still think she should do a book of poetry.

I appreciate this perspective and raw emotional honesty from someone who I consider quite funny and odd in a good way, and it's one of the reasons why I will keep listening to the pod for a long time. The frankness in these reveals gives me perspective on other things in my own life, and is above a lot of cultural bullshit that I could give two hoots about.

"[Daydreaming] is common in people's daily life, shown by a large-scale study in which participants spend 47% of their waking time on average on daydreaming." (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daydream)

Do you ever use game development ideation as a productive replacement for daydreaming? For example, when your mind wanders, does it think of new content and features for the project you are working on?

Game developers have the rare capability of bringing their daydreams to life, so it's an easy habit to form, but I'm wondering if it is unhealthy to attempt to monetize our downtime like this. A few minutes of daydreaming can generate years worth of development work, which causes frustration when the ideas start piling up and wears away at motivation to continue working on older ideas.

CW: suicidal ideation (obviously)

As I transition I'm gaining more perspective on my past and how mentally unhealthy I was. Looking back it's really distressing to remember what I thought of as normal.

CW: Seriously, if you don't want to read someone's disturbing thoughts, click away.

Like, I used to really enjoy thinking about getting in airplane, filling it with gas, pointing the nose out to sea, turning off the radios, and waiting for the inevitable. After about 3 hours there'd be no possibility of getting back to land. I'm a pilot who lived near the Pacific so this was completely doable. I really enjoyed thinking through all the details of how to make sure no one had any chance of tracking me for search and rescue. Daydreaming about the second half of the flight where the end was inevitable just felt so peaceful.

I thought this was normal!! When I started therapy for transition I honestly answered that I'd never had suicidal thoughts. I'd never made an attempt or a specific plan and I figured everyone had thoughts and fantasies like that. Compare that to now, where in nearly 2 years of transitioning I can remember exactly 1 instance of intrusive thoughts about it.

So now I'm left with this confusing mix of grief for how I lived and guilt for thinking those thoughts. How do I find compassion for the part of me that wanted to end me? How do I trust that I won't slip back into those thoughts?

I’m a new mental health worker at a community mental health clinic. I typically do bio psycho socials on new clients who are initiating services. When I am doing the assessment, if a client is expressing suicidal thoughts with no intent or plan, we create a safety plan and ensure they have the number for our after hours crisis number, they have identified supports in place, and things they can do to calm down

If someone is still expressing SI with a plan to hurt themselves, we will have one of our doctors assess and then send them to the local hospital if they determine it’s necessary.

That happened in one of my intakes. The client reported that they attempted suicide a few nights prior and it was unsuccessful, and they said they were going to try again that night. The client then went to the local hospital after speaking to a MD. One of the doctors at the hospital was irritated with our clinic that the client was sent to the hospital when the client was coming into the clinic for help.

So my question is, what is your protocol when someone is expressing SI with a plan of intent? Is it typical that the client would be sent to the hospital? I am very new to the field (finishing up my MSW in the spring) so any feedback is much appreciated!

I feel like setting my house on fire or doing a mass shooting somewhere

(These are just thoughts/urges) (I have no arson stuff or guns or anything)

I never had these thoughts, but since last year i have them, since i accepted my illness. I want to know why this is happening?

I’d say I think about it every 20 minutes or so. Usually just a fleeting comment that goes through my mind that maybe I should just end this all. It doesn’t elicit much of an emotional response and I don’t feel much different.

When I was doing the journals for CBT, I would have pages and pages of different ways, 70% of all my automatic thoughts are related in someway. But the emotional and physical response was negligible or at least not noticeable. I think about it hundreds of times a day.

But I don’t actually see it as a problem or a risk, I couldn’t do it if I wanted to. Which I think is why I crave it, it’s an escape in a world where none of the actual escapes work for me anymore. Whenever I get asked that question by a therapist or nurse, “do you think about suicide?“ I fake chuckle and say yes. Just be sure to tell them you don’t have a plan.

I know it went away when I had a few good months back in 2019 so I’m probably just ridiculously unhappy. Shocker

I'm sort of at a loss at the moment. I got through a bit of a rough patch a while ago and now I'm in a good groove. I taken to studying Bahasa Indonesian and found that I'm actually incredibly good at it so far. I've begun writing again and I've even received a few short story commissions. Things are going better now than they have in quite some time.

So... why am I still suicidal? Why do I often think "well this is great, but suicide will come at some point and it'll be a shame when it does because this is fun."? My trauma still bugs me constantly of course but I've accepted that as an unfortunate constant in my life for some time now.

I feel like I've just given up entirely. Even when I'm doing well, even when I'm becoming "normal" so to speak, all I can think of is how it'll suck that at some undetermined point, I'll take my life. It's never "well it's a possibility" it's an inevitability.

I just don't get what I'm doing wrong. I'm doing everything I'm supposed to. Meds, therapy, hobbies, friends, the whole nine yards. And it's not even to say I'm unhappy, lately I've been quite upbeat. So why is it that, even when I'm happy, my thoughts are never far from that? Does this just never go away like my trauma?

The other mental health group I post in the most is literally full of suicidal ideation posts right now- imagine that.

So I just decided to tell y'all.

I hadn't been working up to a big holiday plan. But it was close for a fucking minute there, drinking alone and feeling the pain of touch starvation like never before. Imagining being able to go out and throwing up imagining male bodies brushing up against me. Feeling the disgust of being trapped in the body that did all those things.

New Year's is still fucking stupid.

Nothing will be new. The only things that matter already happened. Nothing will change it. I am an empty rag doll serving no purpose until I assume someone will come along and traffic me again because is that is why I exist. I wish to my core that I didn't have to.

Not in danger.

i am forcing myself to stay alive for my girlfriend (and only her, i have no one else 🙃) at this point. i wake up everyday out of obligation. i have nothing in life that brings me even an ounce of joy anymore. no goals. no hopes. not even a fucking hobby. as far as i'm concerned, the future doesn't even exist. circumstances might change but after you're robbed of your childhood it kinda feels like there is absolutely nothing left to look forward to. idk if that makes sense to anyone, it's just like my childhood should have been the most carefree and happy time in my life, but all i remember is terror? so how am i ever supposed to think things will get better? the shit most people reminisce about, i'm crying about in therapy every week. it's so stupid. i feel so pathetic for trying

i don't know what there is left for me to do. i go to therapy every week and take my stupid meds. tried journaling but i can't keep up with it. tried doing art but i hate everything i draw. my main coping mechanism is getting stoned and staring at a wall until it's time to go to bed, and even then i usually only sleep for 4-5 hours and wake up just as broken as i was when i went to bed. not even sleeping feels good. it's just another thing i have to do, like eating, to keep my body going so my gf is happy.

everyone who says it gets better is lying. you might learn to cope better but the nightmares and the flashbacks never go away. i don't really see the point in a life that is going to be so difficult. maybe if i enjoyed some small part of it i wouldn't care that it's so goddamn hard to simply get out of bed in the morning, but there isn't shit here for me. just my girlfriend. and relationships aren't forever, or she'll fucking die, or what the hell ever will happen, and i'm gonna just be alone again anyway. i don't see the point in human connection. just another opportunity for pain.

i'm so tired of being told it will get better. i am nearly 30. it doesn't fucking get better. and i'm so angry at all the people who've lied to me over the years, like my therapist and other mental health "professionals" who's only interest is my money anyway. they've made it really clear that i'm not worth salvaging. no talents. not pretty or kind or anything useful to the world. but they keep fucking with me and saying that time will heal it or whatever the fuck, y'know, because we live in a society where we aren't allowed the dignity to fucking DIE when we want to.

just been crying for da

Convince yourself life isn’t worth living? Everyone hates you? Feel paranoid?

I’m going through absolute hell already, I’m in withdrawal from medication and suffering from a long-term adverse reaction to an anti biotic. Luteal phase on top of this is pushing me to my absolute limit.